Writing. "To live honestly, you have to break, get confused, fight, make mistakes ..." (Leo Tolstoy). (Based on the novel by Leo Tolstoy "War and Peace")

Problems of morality and spirituality have always been the most important in the literature of the 19th century. Writers and their heroes were constantly worried about the deepest and most serious questions: how to live, what is the meaning of human life, how to come to God, how to change for the better not only your life, but also the lives of other people. It is these thoughts that overwhelm one of the main characters of the novel by L.N. Tolstoy's "War and Peace" by Pierre Bezukhov.
At the beginning of the novel, Pierre appears before us as a completely naive, inexperienced young man who lived all his youth abroad. He does not know how to behave in a secular society, in the salon of Anna Pavlovna Sherer he causes the hostess's anxiety and fear: “Although Pierre was indeed somewhat larger than the other men in the room, this fear could only refer to that intelligent and at the same time timid, observant and natural look that distinguished him from everyone in this living room. " Pierre behaves naturally, he is the only one in this environment who does not wear a mask of hypocrisy, he says what he thinks.
Having become the owner of a large inheritance, Pierre, with his honesty and faith in the kindness of people, falls into the nets set by Prince Kuragin. The prince's attempts to take possession of the inheritance were unsuccessful, so he decided to get the money in another way: to marry Pierre to his daughter Helene. Pierre is attracted by her external beauty, but he cannot figure out whether she is smart or kind. For a long time he hesitates to propose to her, in fact, he does not make it, Prince Kuragin decides everything for him.
After marriage, there comes a turning point in the hero's life, a period of comprehension of his whole life, its meaning. The culmination of these experiences of Pierre was a duel with Dolokhov, Helene's lover. In the good-natured and peace-loving Pierre, who learned about the insolent and cynical attitude of Helen and Dolokhov towards him, anger boils, "something terrible and ugly arose in his soul." The duel highlights all the best qualities of Pierre: his courage, the courage of a man who has nothing to lose, his philanthropy, his moral strength. Having wound Dolokhov, he is waiting for his shot: "Pierre, with a gentle smile of regret and remorse, helplessly spreading his legs and arms, stood with his broad chest in front of Dolokhov and looked sadly at him."
The author compares Pierre with Dolokhov in this scene: Pierre does not want to harm him, let alone kill him, and Dolokhov laments that he missed and did not hit Pierre. After the duel, Pierre was tormented by thoughts and experiences: "Such a storm of feelings, thoughts, memories suddenly arose in his soul that he not only could not sleep, but could not sit still and had to jump off the couch and walk around the room with quick steps."
He analyzes everything that happened, the relationship with his wife, the duel and realizes that he has lost all values ​​in life, he does not know how to live on, he only blames himself for making this mistake - marrying Helen, reflects on life and death: “Who is right, who's guilty? No one. And live - and live: you will die tomorrow, as I could have died an hour ago. And is it worth it to suffer when there is only one second left to live in comparison with eternity? ... What's wrong? What well? What should I love, what should I hate? Why live and what am I? What is life, what is death? What is the power that controls everything? " In this state of moral doubts, he meets the freemason Bazdeev at an inn in Torzhok, and the “strict, intelligent and shrewd expression of his gaze” amazes Bezukhov.
Bazdeev sees the cause of Pierre's misfortune in his disbelief in God: "Pierre, with a sinking heart, gazing into the face of the Mason with shining eyes, listened to him, did not interrupt, did not ask him, but with all his soul believed what this stranger told him." Pierre himself enters the Masonic lodge and tries to live by the laws of goodness and justice. Having received the life support in the form of Freemasonry, he gains self-confidence and purpose in life. Pierre drives through his estates, trying to make life easier for his serfs. He wants to build schools and hospitals for the peasants, but the cunning manager deceives Pierre, and there are no practical results of Pierre's trip. But he himself is full of faith in himself, and during this period of his life he manages to help his friend, Prince Andrei Bolkonsky, who is raising his son after the death of his wife.
Prince Andrew is disappointed in life after Austerlitz, after the death of the little princess, and Pierre manages to stir him up, awaken interest in his surroundings: “If there is God and there is a future life, that is, truth, there is virtue; and man's highest happiness is to strive to attain them. We must live, we must love, we must believe that we are not living now only on this piece of land, but we have lived and will live forever there, in everything. "
Tolstoy shows us how the period of reflection on his life can be replaced by complete disappointment and despair, which is what happens to his beloved hero. Pierre loses faith in the teachings of the Freemasons when he sees that they are all engaged not in organizing the world, but in their own career, prosperity, and the pursuit of power. He returns to secular society and again lives an empty, meaningless life. The only thing that he has in life is love for Natasha, but an alliance between them is impossible.
The war with Napoleon gives meaning to Pierre's life: he is present at the Battle of Borodino, he sees the courage and heroism of Russian soldiers, he is next to them on the Rayevsky battery, brings them shells, helps them in whatever he can. Despite his absurd appearance for battle (he arrived in a green tailcoat and a white hat), the soldiers were imbued with sympathy for Pierre for his courage and even gave the nickname "our master".
Pierre was struck by the terrible picture of the battle. When he sees that almost everyone on the battery has died, he thinks: "No, now they will leave it, now they are terrified of what they did!" After the battle, Pierre reflects on the courage of the Russian soldiers: “Be a soldier, just a soldier! To enter this common life with the whole being, to be imbued with what makes them so ... The most difficult thing is to be able to unite the meaning of everything in your soul ... No, not to unite. It is impossible to combine thoughts, but to combine all these thoughts - that's what you need! Yes, you need to pair, you need to pair! "
To connect his life with the life of the people - this is the idea that Pierre comes to. Further events in Pierre's life only confirm this idea. An attempt to kill Napoleon in burning Moscow turns into saving the life of a French officer, and saving a girl from a burning house and helping a woman - taking prisoner. In Moscow, Pierre performs his feat, but for him this is a natural human behavior, since he is brave and noble. Probably the most important events in Pierre's life take place in captivity.
Acquaintance with Platon Karataev taught Pierre that necessary life wisdom, which he lacked. The ability to adapt to any conditions and not lose humanity and kindness at the same time - this was revealed to Pierre by a simple Russian man. “For Pierre, as he presented himself on the first night, an incomprehensible, round and eternal personification of the spirit of simplicity and truth, this is how he remained forever,” Tolstoy writes about Platon Karataev. In captivity, Pierre begins to feel his unity with the world: “Pierre looked into the sky, deep into the departing, playing stars. "And all this is mine, and all this is in me, and all this is me!"
When Pierre is released, when a completely different life begins, full of new problems, everything that he has suffered and felt is preserved in his soul. Everything Pierre experienced did not pass without leaving a trace, he became a person who knows the meaning of life, its purpose. A happy family life did not make him forget about his destiny. The fact that Pierre enters a secret society, that he is a future Decembrist, is natural for Pierre. Throughout his life, he has suffered the right to fight for the rights of other people.
Describing the life of his hero, Tolstoy shows us a vivid illustration of the words that he once wrote down in his diary: “To live honestly, you have to torn, get confused, fight, make mistakes, start and quit, and start again, and quit again. and forever fight and lose. And calmness is spiritual meanness. "

To live honestly, you have to torn, get confused, fight, make mistakes 8230 Based on the novel by Tolstoy War and Peace

Problems of morality and spirituality have always been the most important in the literature of the 19th century. Writers and their heroes were constantly worried about the deepest and most serious questions: how to live, what is the meaning of human life, how to come to God, how to change for the better not only your life, but also the lives of other people. It is these thoughts that overwhelm one of the main characters of the novel by L.N. Tolstoy's "War and Peace" by Pierre Bezukhov.

At the beginning of the novel, Pierre appears before us as a completely naive, inexperienced young man who lived all his youth abroad. He does not know how to behave in a secular society, in the salon of Anna Pavlovna Sherer he causes the hostess's anxiety and fear: “Although Pierre was indeed somewhat larger than the other men in the room, this fear could only refer to that intelligent and at the same time timid, observant and natural look that distinguished him from everyone in this living room. " Pierre behaves naturally, he is the only one in this environment who does not wear a mask of hypocrisy, he says what he thinks.

Having become the owner of a large inheritance, Pierre, with his honesty and faith in the kindness of people, falls into the nets set by Prince Kuragin. The prince's attempts to take possession of the inheritance were unsuccessful, so he decided to get the money in another way: to marry Pierre to his daughter Helene. Pierre is attracted by her external beauty, but he cannot figure out whether she is smart or kind. For a long time he hesitates to propose to her, in fact, he does not make it, Prince Kuragin decides everything for him. After marriage, there comes a turning point in the hero's life, a period of comprehension of his whole life, its meaning. The culmination of these experiences of Pierre was a duel with Dolokhov, Helene's lover. In the good-natured and peace-loving Pierre, who learned about the insolent and cynical attitude of Helen and Dolokhov towards him, anger boils, "something terrible and ugly arose in his soul." The duel highlights all the best qualities of Pierre: his courage, the courage of a man who has nothing to lose, his philanthropy, his moral strength. Having wound Dolokhov, he is waiting for his shot: "Pierre, with a gentle smile of regret and remorse, helplessly spreading his legs and arms, stood with his broad chest in front of Dolokhov and looked sadly at him." The author compares Pierre with Dolokhov in this scene: Pierre does not want to harm him, let alone kill him, and Dolokhov laments that he missed and did not hit Pierre. After the duel, Pierre was tormented by thoughts and experiences: "Such a storm of feelings, thoughts, memories suddenly arose in his soul that he not only could not sleep, but could not sit still and had to jump off the couch and walk around the room with quick steps." analyzes everything that happened, relations with his wife, a duel and realizes that he has lost all life values, he does not know how to live on, he only blames himself for making this mistake - marrying Helen, reflects on life and death: “Who is right, who to blame? No one. And live - and live: you will die tomorrow, as I could have died an hour ago. And is it worth it to suffer when there is only one second left to live in comparison with eternity? ... What's wrong? What well? What should I love, what should I hate? Why live and what am I? What is life, what is death? What is the power that controls everything? " In this state of moral doubts, he meets the freemason Bazdeev at an inn in Torzhok, and the “strict, intelligent and shrewd expression of his gaze” amazes Bezukhov. Bazdeev sees the cause of Pierre's misfortune in his disbelief in God: "Pierre, with a sinking heart, gazing into the face of the Mason with shining eyes, listened to him, did not interrupt, did not ask him, but with all his soul believed what this stranger told him." Pierre himself enters the Masonic lodge and tries to live by the laws of goodness and justice. Having received the life support in the form of Freemasonry, he gains self-confidence and purpose in life. Pierre drives through his estates, trying to make life easier for his serfs. He wants to build schools and hospitals for the peasants, but the cunning manager deceives Pierre, and there are no practical results of Pierre's trip. But he himself is full of faith in himself, and during this period of his life he manages to help his friend, Prince Andrei Bolkonsky, who is raising his son after the death of his wife. Prince Andrew is disappointed in life after Austerlitz, after the death of the little princess, and Pierre manages to stir him up, awaken interest in his surroundings: “If there is God and there is a future life, that is, truth, there is virtue; and man's highest happiness is to strive to attain them. We must live, we must love, we must believe that we are not living now only on this piece of land, but we have lived and will live forever there, in everything. "

Tolstoy shows us how the period of reflection on his life can be replaced by complete disappointment and despair, which is what happens to his beloved hero. Pierre loses faith in the teachings of the Freemasons when he sees that they are all engaged not in organizing the world, but in their own career, prosperity, and the pursuit of power. He returns to secular society and again lives an empty, meaningless life. The only thing that he has in life is love for Natasha, but an alliance between them is impossible. The war with Napoleon gives meaning to Pierre's life: he is present at the Battle of Borodino, he sees the courage and heroism of Russian soldiers, he is next to them on the Rayevsky battery, brings them shells, helps them in whatever he can. Despite his absurd appearance for battle (he arrived in a green tailcoat and a white hat), the soldiers were imbued with sympathy for Pierre for his courage and even gave the nickname "our master". Pierre was struck by the terrible picture of the battle. When he sees that almost everyone on the battery has died, he thinks: "No, now they will leave it, now they are terrified of what they did!" After the battle, Pierre reflects on the courage of the Russian soldiers: “Be a soldier, just a soldier! To enter this common life with the whole being, to be imbued with what makes them so ... The most difficult thing is to be able to unite the meaning of everything in your soul ... No, not to unite. It is impossible to combine thoughts, but to combine all these thoughts - that's what you need! Yes, you need to pair, you need to pair! " To connect his life with the life of the people - this is the idea that Pierre comes to. Further events in Pierre's life only confirm this idea. An attempt to kill Napoleon in burning Moscow turns into saving the life of a French officer, and saving a girl from a burning house and helping a woman - taking prisoner. In Moscow, Pierre performs his feat, but for him this is a natural human behavior, since he is brave and noble. Probably the most important events in Pierre's life take place in captivity. Acquaintance with Platon Karataev taught Pierre that necessary life wisdom, which he lacked. The ability to adapt to any conditions and not lose humanity and kindness at the same time - this was revealed to Pierre by a simple Russian man. “For Pierre, as he presented himself on the first night, an incomprehensible, round and eternal personification of the spirit of simplicity and truth, this is how he remained forever,” Tolstoy writes about Platon Karataev. In captivity, Pierre begins to feel his unity with the world: “Pierre looked into the sky, deep into the departing, playing stars. "And all this is mine, and all this is in me, and all this is me!"

When Pierre is released, when a completely different life begins, full of new problems, everything that he has suffered and felt is preserved in his soul. Everything Pierre experienced did not pass without leaving a trace, he became a person who knows the meaning of life, its purpose. A happy family life did not make him forget about his destiny. The fact that Pierre enters a secret society, that he is a future Decembrist, is natural for Pierre. Throughout his life, he has suffered the right to fight for the rights of other people.

Describing the life of his hero, Tolstoy shows us a vivid illustration of the words that he once wrote down in his diary: “To live honestly, you have to torn, get confused, fight, make mistakes, start and quit, and start again, and quit again. and forever fight and lose. And calmness is spiritual meanness. "

1. The hero of the epic novel "War in Peace" Pierre Bezukhov.
2. Bezukhov's moral searches.
3. Spiritual and moral formation of Pierre Bezukhov.

Human life is complex and multifaceted. At all times there have been moral values, to step over which meant forever incurring shame and contempt. Human dignity is manifested in his striving for lofty goals. I would like to dedicate my essay to the hero of Leo Tolstoy's epic novel War and Peace, Pierre Bezukhov. This amazing person cannot but arouse interest. Pierre is focused on his personality, but he is not self-absorbed. He is keenly interested in life around him. For him, the question is very acute: "Why live and what am I?" This issue is very important and decisive for him. Bezukhov thinks about the meaninglessness of life and death, about the fact that it is impossible to find the meaning of being; about the relativity of all truths. Pierre is alien to secular society, in empty and meaningless communication he cannot find his truth.

The questions that torment Pierre cannot be resolved through theoretical reasoning alone. Even reading books cannot help here. Pierre finds answers to his questions only in real life. Human suffering, contradictions, tragedies are all integral parts of life itself. And Pierre is completely immersed in it. He approaches the truth, being in the epicenter of events, tragic and terrible * The spiritual formation of Bezukhov, one way or another, is influenced by the war, the fire of Moscow, the French captivity, the suffering of people with whom he is very close. Pierre has the opportunity to practically come to grips with the life of the people. And this cannot leave him indifferent.

On the way to Mozhaisk, Pierre was seized by a special feeling: “the deeper he plunged into this sea of ​​troops, the more he was seized by anxiety and anxiety and a new joyful feeling he had not yet experienced ... constitutes the happiness of people, the comforts of life, wealth, even life itself, there is nonsense, which is pleasant to cast aside in comparison with something ... ".

At the Borodino field, Pierre understood “... the whole meaning and all the meaning of this war and the upcoming battle ... , and which explained to him why all these people calmly and as if frivolously prepared for death. "

After Pierre was next to the soldiers, imbued with their courage, it seemed to him the most correct and wise to merge with them, with simple people, but wise in their understanding of life. It is no coincidence that he says: "To be a soldier, to be a simple soldier! ... To enter this common life with your whole being, to be imbued with what makes them so."

Throughout his life, Pierre had many hobbies and disappointments. There was a period when Pierre admired Napoleon; there was also a period of passion for Freemasonry. However, in the process of moral regeneration, Pierre abandons his former hobbies, comes to the ideas of Decembrism. Its formation was greatly influenced by communication with ordinary people. From the very first minutes of our acquaintance with Pierre, we understand that we have an outstanding, sincere, open nature in front of us. Pierre feels uncomfortable in a secular society, and society does not accept him as one of its own, despite even the rich inheritance that Bezukhov received from his father. He does not look like the regulars of secular salons. Pierre is too different from them to be his own.

In the process of communicating with the soldiers, mainly with Platon Karataev, Pierre Bezukhov begins to understand life better. Now his thoughts are no longer abstract, speculative. He wants to direct his energies to real actions that could help others. For example, Bezukhov seeks to help those who suffered from the war. And in the epilogue, he enters the secret society of the Decembrists. This decision was obviously influenced by everything he saw in the process of communicating with ordinary people. Now Bezukhov understands well all the contradictions of life, and, as far as possible, wants to fight them. He says: “There is theft in the courts, there is only one stick in the army: shagistika, settlements, they torture the people, stifle enlightenment. What is young, honestly, is ruined! "

Pierre does not just understand and condemn all the contradictions and shortcomings of life. He has already achieved that moral and spiritual development, when the intentions to change the existing reality are obvious and necessary: ​​“let there be not one virtue, but independence and activity”.

The moral searches of Pierre Bezukhov make his image especially interesting for us. It is known that the very fate of Pierre served as the basis for the idea of ​​the novel "War and Peace". The fact that the image of Pierre is shown in development speaks of the author's special disposition towards him. In the novel, static images are those that do not evoke warm feelings from the writer.

Pierre cannot but delight readers with his kindness, sincerity, and directness. There are times when his abstract reasoning, detachment from life, seem incomprehensible. But in the process of his development, he overcomes the weaknesses of his nature and moves from the need for reflection to the need for action.

To live honestly, you have to torn, get confused, fight, make mistakes 8230 Based on the novel by Tolstoy War and Peace

Problems of morality and spirituality have always been the most important in the literature of the 19th century. Writers and their heroes were constantly worried about the deepest and most serious questions: how to live, what is the meaning of human life, how to come to God, how to change for the better not only your life, but also the lives of other people. It is these thoughts that overwhelm one of the main characters of the novel by L.N. Tolstoy's "War and Peace" by Pierre Bezukhov.

At the beginning of the novel, Pierre appears before us as a completely naive, inexperienced young man who lived all his youth abroad. He does not know how to behave in a secular society, in the salon of Anna Pavlovna Sherer he causes the hostess's anxiety and fear: “Although Pierre was indeed somewhat larger than the other men in the room, this fear could only refer to that intelligent and at the same time timid, observant and natural look that distinguished him from everyone in this living room. " Pierre behaves naturally, he is the only one in this environment who does not wear a mask of hypocrisy, he says what he thinks.

Having become the owner of a large inheritance, Pierre, with his honesty and faith in the kindness of people, falls into the nets set by Prince Kuragin. The prince's attempts to take possession of the inheritance were unsuccessful, so he decided to get the money in another way: to marry Pierre to his daughter Helene. Pierre is attracted by her external beauty, but he cannot figure out whether she is smart or kind. For a long time he hesitates to propose to her, in fact, he does not make it, Prince Kuragin decides everything for him. After marriage, there comes a turning point in the hero's life, a period of comprehension of his whole life, its meaning. The culmination of these experiences of Pierre was a duel with Dolokhov, Helene's lover. In the good-natured and peace-loving Pierre, who learned about the insolent and cynical attitude of Helen and Dolokhov towards him, anger boils, "something terrible and ugly arose in his soul." The duel highlights all the best qualities of Pierre: his courage, the courage of a man who has nothing to lose, his philanthropy, his moral strength. Having wound Dolokhov, he is waiting for his shot: "Pierre, with a gentle smile of regret and remorse, helplessly spreading his legs and arms, stood with his broad chest in front of Dolokhov and looked sadly at him." The author compares Pierre with Dolokhov in this scene: Pierre does not want to harm him, let alone kill him, and Dolokhov laments that he missed and did not hit Pierre. After the duel, Pierre was tormented by thoughts and experiences: "Such a storm of feelings, thoughts, memories suddenly arose in his soul that he not only could not sleep, but could not sit still and had to jump off the couch and walk around the room with quick steps." analyzes everything that happened, relations with his wife, a duel and realizes that he has lost all life values, he does not know how to live on, he only blames himself for making this mistake - marrying Helen, reflects on life and death: “Who is right, who to blame? No one. And live - and live: you will die tomorrow, as I could have died an hour ago. And is it worth it to suffer when there is only one second left to live in comparison with eternity? ... What's wrong? What well? What should I love, what should I hate? Why live and what am I? What is life, what is death? What is the power that controls everything? " In this state of moral doubts, he meets the freemason Bazdeev at an inn in Torzhok, and the “strict, intelligent and shrewd expression of his gaze” amazes Bezukhov. Bazdeev sees the cause of Pierre's misfortune in his disbelief in God: "Pierre, with a sinking heart, gazing into the face of the Mason with shining eyes, listened to him, did not interrupt, did not ask him, but with all his soul believed what this stranger told him." Pierre himself enters the Masonic lodge and tries to live by the laws of goodness and justice. Having received the life support in the form of Freemasonry, he gains self-confidence and purpose in life. Pierre drives through his estates, trying to make life easier for his serfs. He wants to build schools and hospitals for the peasants, but the cunning manager deceives Pierre, and there are no practical results of Pierre's trip. But he himself is full of faith in himself, and during this period of his life he manages to help his friend, Prince Andrei Bolkonsky, who is raising his son after the death of his wife. Prince Andrew is disappointed in life after Austerlitz, after the death of the little princess, and Pierre manages to stir him up, awaken interest in his surroundings: “If there is God and there is a future life, that is, truth, there is virtue; and man's highest happiness is to strive to attain them. We must live, we must love, we must believe that we are not living now only on this piece of land, but we have lived and will live forever there, in everything. "

Tolstoy shows us how the period of reflection on his life can be replaced by complete disappointment and despair, which is what happens to his beloved hero. Pierre loses faith in the teachings of the Freemasons when he sees that they are all engaged not in organizing the world, but in their own career, prosperity, and the pursuit of power. He returns to secular society and again lives an empty, meaningless life. The only thing that he has in life is love for Natasha, but an alliance between them is impossible. The war with Napoleon gives meaning to Pierre's life: he is present at the Battle of Borodino, he sees the courage and heroism of Russian soldiers, he is next to them on the Rayevsky battery, brings them shells, helps them in whatever he can. Despite his absurd appearance for battle (he arrived in a green tailcoat and a white hat), the soldiers were imbued with sympathy for Pierre for his courage and even gave the nickname "our master". Pierre was struck by the terrible picture of the battle. When he sees that almost everyone on the battery has died, he thinks: "No, now they will leave it, now they are terrified of what they did!" After the battle, Pierre reflects on the courage of the Russian soldiers: “Be a soldier, just a soldier! To enter this common life with the whole being, to be imbued with what makes them so ... The most difficult thing is to be able to unite the meaning of everything in your soul ... No, not to unite. It is impossible to combine thoughts, but to combine all these thoughts - that's what you need! Yes, you need to pair, you need to pair! " To connect his life with the life of the people - this is the idea that Pierre comes to. Further events in Pierre's life only confirm this idea. An attempt to kill Napoleon in burning Moscow turns into saving the life of a French officer, and saving a girl from a burning house and helping a woman - taking prisoner. In Moscow, Pierre performs his feat, but for him this is a natural human behavior, since he is brave and noble. Probably the most important events in Pierre's life take place in captivity. Acquaintance with Platon Karataev taught Pierre that necessary life wisdom, which he lacked. The ability to adapt to any conditions and not lose humanity and kindness at the same time - this was revealed to Pierre by a simple Russian man. “For Pierre, as he presented himself on the first night, an incomprehensible, round and eternal personification of the spirit of simplicity and truth, this is how he remained forever,” Tolstoy writes about Platon Karataev. In captivity, Pierre begins to feel his unity with the world: “Pierre looked into the sky, deep into the departing, playing stars. "And all this is mine, and all this is in me, and all this is me!"

When Pierre is released, when a completely different life begins, full of new problems, everything that he has suffered and felt is preserved in his soul. Everything Pierre experienced did not pass without leaving a trace, he became a person who knows the meaning of life, its purpose. A happy family life did not make him forget about his destiny. The fact that Pierre enters a secret society, that he is a future Decembrist, is natural for Pierre. Throughout his life, he has suffered the right to fight for the rights of other people.

Describing the life of his hero, Tolstoy shows us a vivid illustration of the words that he once wrote down in his diary: “To live honestly, you have to torn, get confused, fight, make mistakes, start and quit, and start again, and quit again. and forever fight and lose. And calmness is spiritual meanness. "

LETTER TO A. A. TOLSTOY. 1857

Returning from abroad to Yasnaya Polyana, Tolstoy wrote a very important letter to his aunt on October 20:
“Eternal anxiety, work, struggle, hardship - these are necessary conditions, from which not a single person should dare to think to get out even for a second. Only honest anxiety, struggle and labor based on love is what is called happiness. But happiness is a stupid word; not happiness, but good; and dishonest anxiety based on self-love is unhappiness. Here is, in the most succinct form, a change in the outlook on life that has taken place in me lately.

It’s funny for me to remember how I thought and how you seem to think that you can arrange a happy and honest world in which you can calmly, without mistakes, without remorse, without confusion, live for yourself on the sly and do everything without haste, neatly, everything only good. Funny! You can't ... To live honestly, you have to break, get confused, fight, make mistakes, start and quit, and start again, and quit again, and always struggle and lose. And calmness is a spiritual meanness. This is why the bad side of our soul wants peace, not foreseeing that achieving it is associated with the loss of everything that is beautiful in us. "

Rereading in his last year, 1910, his correspondence with Alexandra Andreevna * prepared for publication *, Tolstoy responded about this letter in the Diary as follows: said another. "

PSS, v. 58, p. 23.

* L. N. Tolstoy and A. A. Tolstaya. Correspondence (1857-1903). - M., 1911; 2nd ed. - 2011.