Quotes from the book golden calf. Life is beautiful, despite the shortcomings: a selection of quotes from the movie The Golden Calf

You are a dude, - repeated Ostap, - and the son of a dude. And your children will be dudes. Boy! What happened this morning is not even an episode, but just a pure coincidence, a whim of an artist. Gentleman in search of ten. Catching such meager odds is not in my nature. And what kind of profession is this, God forgive me! Lieutenant Schmidt's son! Well, another year, well, two. And then what? Further, your red curls become familiar, and they will simply start beating you.
- So what to do? Balaganov got worried. - How to get daily bread?
"We must think," said Ostap sternly.

Are you at Studebaker?
“You can consider our car a Studebaker,” Ostap said angrily, “but until now it was called Lauren-Dietrich.” Are you satisfied?
But the amateur driver was not satisfied.
- Excuse me, - he exclaimed with youthful importunity, - but there are no Lauren-Dietrichs in the run! I read in the newspaper that there were two Packards, two Fiats and one Studebaker.
- Go to hell with your Studebaker! shouted Ostap. - Who is Studebaker? Is this your cousin Studebaker? Is your dad a Studebaker? What are you stuck to man?! They tell him in Russian that the Studebaker was replaced by Lauren-Dietrich at the last moment, and he fools his head! Studebaker! Studebaker!
The young man has long been pushed aside by the stewards, and Ostap for a long time... →→→

And how is Rio de Janeiro, - Balaganov asked excitedly. - Shall we go?
- Well, to hell with it! - Ostap said with unexpected anger. - All this is a fiction, there is no Rio de Janeiro, and there is no America, and there is no Europe, there is nothing. And in general, the last city is Shepetovka, on which the waves of the Atlantic Ocean break.

Yesterday, an old woman approached me on the street and offered to buy an eternal needle for a stove. You know, Adam, I didn't buy it. I don't need an eternal needle, I don't want to live forever. I want to die. I have all the vulgar signs of falling in love: lack of appetite, insomnia and a manic desire to compose poetry. Listen to what I sprinkled last night in the flickering light of an electric lamp: "I remember a wonderful moment, you appeared before me, like a fleeting vision, like a genius of pure beauty." Really, okay? Talented? And only at dawn, when the last lines were completed, I remembered that this verse had already been written by A. Pushkin. Such a hit from a classic!

It's good to live in the world! Balaganov said. - Here we go, we are full. Maybe happiness awaits us...
- Are you sure of that? asked Ostap. - Happiness awaits us on the road? Maybe he's still flapping his wings with impatience? Where, he says, is Admiral Balaganov? Why has he been gone for so long? You are crazy, Balaganov! Happiness waits for no one. It roams the country in long white robes, singing a children's song: "Ah, America is a country, they walk and drink without a snack." But this naive baby needs to be caught, she needs to be liked, she needs to be looked after. And you, Balaganov, will not have an affair with this baby. You are a rogue. Look, who do you look like? The man in your suit will never achieve happiness.

Here I am a millionaire! Ostap exclaimed with cheerful surprise. - Dreams come true idiot!
Ostap suddenly became sad. He was struck by the everydayness of the situation, it seemed strange to him that the world did not change that very second and that nothing, absolutely nothing happened around him. And although he knew that no mysterious caves, barrels of gold and Aladdin's light bulbs were supposed to be in our harsh time, he still felt sorry for something. He became a little bored, like Roald Amundsen, when, flying in the Norge airship over the North Pole, to which he had made his way all his life, he said without enthusiasm to his companions: “Well, here we are.” Below was broken ice, cracks, cold, emptiness. The secret is revealed, the goal is achieved, there is nothing more to do, and it is necessary to change the profession.

That's not how things are done,' said Koreiko with a merchant's smile.
“Perhaps,” Ostap sighed, “but, you know, I am not a financier. I am a freelance artist and a cold philosopher.
- What do you want to get money for? I earned them, and you...
- I not only worked. I even got hurt. After talking with Berlaga, Skumbrievich and Polykhaev, I lost faith in humanity. Isn't it worth a million rubles, faith in humanity?

I need five hundred thousand. And whenever possible at once, but not in parts.
- Can you still take parts? - asked the vengeful Balaganov.
Ostap looked attentively at his interlocutor and quite seriously replied:
- I would take parts. But I need it right now.

The June morning was just beginning to take shape. The acacias trembled, dropping cold tin dew on the flat stones. Street birds chirped some merry rubbish. At the end of the street, below, behind the roofs of the houses, a molten, heavy sea was burning. Young dogs, sadly looking around and clattering their claws, climbed onto the dustbins. The hour of the janitors has already passed, the hour of the milkmaids has not yet begun.
There was that interval between five and six o'clock when the janitors, having swung their prickly brooms to their heart's content, had already dispersed to their tents, the city was bright, clean and quiet, like in a state bank. At such a moment, one wants to cry and believe that curdled milk is actually healthier and tastier than bread wine; but distant thunder is already heard: milkmaids with cans are being unloaded from suburban trains. Now they will rush into... →→→

Sky! - said Ostap. - The sky is now deserted. Not that era. Not that period of time. Angels now want to land. It’s good on earth, there are utilities, there is a planetarium, you can see the stars, accompanied by an anti-religious lecture.

A long and strong cannon full blow caused vibrations of the ice surface. A warm wind was blowing. Bender looked down and saw a large green crack in the ice. The ice plateau on which he was swayed and began to crawl under the water at an angle.
The ice has broken! - the great strategist shouted in horror. - The ice has broken, gentlemen of the jury!
He jumped over the parting ice floes, hurrying with all his might to the country from which he so arrogantly said goodbye an hour ago. The fog rose importantly and slowly, revealing a bare floodplain.
Ten minutes later, a strange man came out on the Soviet coast without a hat and in one boot. Addressing no one, he said loudly:
- No applause needed! The Count of Monte Cristo did not come out of me. We'll have to retrain in the janitors!

There are people who do not know how to suffer, somehow it does not work out. And if they do suffer, they try to do it as quickly as possible and inconspicuously to others. Lokhankin, on the other hand, suffered openly, majestically, he lashed his grief with tea glasses, he reveled in it. Great grief gave him the opportunity to once again reflect on the significance of the Russian intelligentsia, as well as on the tragedy of Russian liberalism.

To you, Shura, I will tell everything as if it were my own.
Since the last conversation with the sub-inspector of the Criminal Investigation Department, no one has addressed Balaganov as if he were his own. Therefore, he listened with satisfaction to the words of the courier and flippantly allowed him to continue.

All your troubles come from the fact that you are a truth seeker. You're just a lamb, a failed Baptist. It is sad to observe such decadent moods among drivers. You have a car - and you don't know where to go. Things are worse for us - we don't have a car. But we know where to go.

I'm dying of boredom, we've only been talking for two hours, and you're already tired of me as if I've known you all my life.

Taking advantage of the fact that the starving man's mouth was open for a moment, Varvara deftly squeezed the sandwich into the hole that had formed between the Pharaoh's beard and the shaved Muscovite mustache. But the starving man shook the food out with a strong blow of his tongue.
- Eat, you bastard! Varvara shouted in despair, poking at her sandwich. - An intellectual!
But Lokhankin averted his face and mumbled negatively.

Our Black Sea branch also has its weaknesses, its problems in the assay tent, but such bureaucracy as in Hercules!

You won't get far in this carriage of the past!

What if they aren't gold? - No, you saw it, didn't you?! And what do you think they are?

A bloody boys will not bother?

Take me, I'm good, I'll never be again!

Here I am a millionaire! So shoot me in a movie, idiot's dreams come true!

You can't beat!.. Bender won't let you!

Closer to the body, as Maupassant said! I'll put in my gold teeth and get married!

And you have seen everything, you are all witnesses!

You don't know Panikovsky yet! Panikovsky will sell you all, and buy you, and sell you again, but at a higher price!

You know the news, Adam, every citizen, even a party member, is under pressure from an atmospheric column weighing two hundred and fourteen kilos!

The wreckage of a shipwreck floats in this naval borscht.

Fly, falcons, eagles!

You will know how much I love the goose! I kill him with one blow, like a bullfighter, I kill him!

Are you a thinker? What is your last name, thinker? Jean-Jacques Rousseau? Marcus Aurelius? Spinoza?

Have you been to the bishop's birthday party?

Maybe you want to stab me, cut my body into pieces, send me at low speed to different cities, and ferment my head in a barrel of cabbage?! So I'm against it.

Where were you brought up, Shura!

Materialization of spirits and distribution of… elephants! We have big fights ahead of us!

I will not disturb you. This will prevent you from properly secreting gastric juice, which is so necessary for health.

You're a tramp, Shura, the Gorky type! You need to dress up, wash, give you a major overhaul.

And there is a hole in the face of an old woman, as the Polish beauty Inga Zayonc said a month after her marriage to my childhood friend Kolya Ostenbaken.

And only in the morning, at dawn, I suddenly remembered that this verse had already been written by A. Pushkin. What a hit from a classic!

Excuse me, girl, did you live in 1898 near Marseille?

You are an interesting person, Alexander Ivanovich! Everything is fine with you! Marvelous! With such happiness - and free!

Citizen, you are poisoned!

Give me a million! Give me one mi-lyon!.

Girls love young long-legged and politically literate!

For a good person and a million is not a pity!

You are not descended from a monkey, like all other citizens, you are descended from a cow: you think hard.

Life dictates its harsh laws to us.

Zaburel! Burel, huh! Zaburel!

The meeting continues, gentlemen of the jury!

Connoisseur! You need to kill such connoisseurs!

You have nothing to lose but spare chains.

I will tell you like a family, Shura, you know how I respect you, how I love you, Shura ...

What a femi… oh, femina, my God!.

I will never achieve from you what my childhood friend Kolya Ostenbaken achieved from my childhood friend, the Polish beauty Inga Zayonc: he achieved love from her.

I will lead the parade!

You are a dude, son of a dude and your children will be dudes!

Homer, Milton and Panikovsky - warm ... warm company!

Money should be parted easily, without groans.

Crying, he will climb into the sideboard and get out a plate with blue ... what? - Kaemochka!

Who is against? - I! - Unanimously!

Who is Kozlevich, what to share with him?! We do not know any Kozlevich!

Okay, live, I forgive you!

Personally, I have four hundred relatively honest ways to take money!

Mom, let's go to the bins ..

Will you drink vodka? You won't dance naked in the moonlight?

The lieutenant had three sons: two smart, the third fool.

I have a wife, children and another woman in Rostov-on-Don.

You need to kill such Tolstoyans!

One and a half million people, and all without exception in white pants!

It's time to start working bourgeois life in Rio de Janeiro!

I need five hundred thousand and if possible at once, and not in installments. - Maybe you can still take parts, m-m?

I don't need an eternal needle. I don't want to live forever, I want to die.

A beautiful widow with Persian eyes will not sit on your grave, and crying children will not cry: “Daddy! Dad, can you hear us?!"

Do not make food a cult!

No applause needed! The Count of Monte Cristo did not come out of me.

When will we share our money?

There is no Rio de Janeiro, neither America nor Europe. There is nothing. And in general, the last city on earth is Shepetovka, on which the waves of the Atlantic Ocean break.

No, this is not Rio de Janeiro!

Saw, Shura, saw!

Complete peace of mind can give a person only an insurance policy.

Write, look! Ilf and Petrov!

From ten to four you are for Soviet power, But I am the only one who knows about your second life, from four to ten.

Panikovsky is not obliged to believe everything, Shura!

The defendant tried to kill me, but, of course, only out of pure curiosity: he just wanted to know what I had inside.

No, you go and ask, and they will answer you that before the revolution Panikovsky was blind, Shura!

After getting to know your past and present, I lost faith in humanity. Isn't it worth a million rubles?! ..

You can not recalculate, I have, as in a bank.

Since banknotes roam in the country, then there must be people who have a lot of them.

Do I look like a person who has relatives? !

The most important thing is to bring confusion to the enemy camp. The enemy must lose his mental balance.

Today, on the train and - to the West, to large cultural centers.

This is the end! - This is the end of the first series, student.

I am a poor student, I am a correspondence student. I do not have money! A poor childhood in Kremenchug! My uncle breastfed me!

Workers from you are like a sieve from a dog's tail!

Now many people forget the names of the heroes of the revolution.

Mulattos, millionaires, the cove, exporting coffee, Charleston called "My girl has a little thing"! What to talk about!

How much money do you need to be happy? - Six thousand four hundred.

I am the son of a Turkish subject, therefore, a descendant of the Janissaries, and the Janissaries do not know pity either for women, or for children, or for underground Soviet millionaires.

Take off your hats! Bare your heads! Now the removal of the body will take place!

The Soviet millionaire cannot be found even by the Nar-komfin with its super-powerful tax apparatus.

Our Skumbrievich confessed, he could not stand the confrontation. Let me down!

You can immediately see a person from an early time.

Only theft. - Just a robbery. - Only theft, Shura! - Just a robbery!

Don't you have a cold cutlet in your bosom?

Let's hit the rally on the roads, sloppiness and bureaucracy!

Do you recognize, do you recognize brother Kolya? - I recognize, I recognize brother Kolya!

I'm very poor... I haven't been in a bathhouse for a year... I'm old... girls don't like me...

Trade Union of the Proletarians of Intellectual Labor!

I ask the nervous to leave the room!.

I come in from the left side and you come in from the right side. I press him on the left side to the side, and you press him on the right side to the side. I bang him at this time!..

I beg you, do not eat raw tomatoes at night, so as not to harm the stomach.

I am not a cherub, I have no wings, but I honor the criminal code - this is my weakness.

It was a good folder! It's a pity to give, but the money is needed!

What do you yell like a polar bear in warm weather?

What will happen now! What will I do with him!

They took the girl away! Taken straight from the stall!

It was a former blind man, an impostor and a goose thief.

I only serve on Saturdays..

I'm buying a plane! Wrap it in paper!

I sat under Alexander II, the liberator; I sat under Alexander III, the peacemaker; I sat under Nicholas II, bloody; under Kerensky, hmm! I sat too! Under war communism, I did not sit: there was no work.

I am the son of Lieutenant Schmidt. Remember? Ochakov.

Raise the golden haze! Not a single speck of gold should go to waste!

The defendant tried to kill out of scientific interest. He quickly wanted to find out the structure of my body. Especially the internal organs. Everything that is under my skin evokes a lively, or rather, animal, genuine interest in him.

Do no harm to your stomach. Do not eat in the evening, at night, overripe tomatoes! - Golden calf

What amount will satisfy you, Shura? Maybe a hundred rubles? For happiness, Shura, how much do you need?

Will you drink vodka? Will you dance naked on the table under the moon? Kozlevich

About four hundred easy ways of taking money I know to take possession of other people's money!

Give me a million! Give me my million! Give me a million! Give! Give me my million! Panikovsky

Action from a purely land turns into a sea! Ostap - Golden Calf

You can't count the banknotes in vain. I have everything taken into account, penny to penny, just like in a bank. Koreiko

With screams and weeping, he will open the sideboard, shake off the dust and take out a porcelain plate with blue, ornate, golden ...? Kaemochka! Balaganov, Bender

Why are you deafeningly roaring like a polar bear awakened from its winter hibernation in the spring? Ostap

Shura! You are a Gorky tramp! You urgently need a major overhaul - put on shoes, dress, wash off the road! Ostap

Read the continuation of the best aphorisms and quotes from the “Golden Calf” on the pages:

We have big fights ahead of us! Ostap.

Kozlevich was fooled by priests

The lieutenant had three sons: two smart, the third fool. Ostap.

I am an ideological fighter for banknotes!

I ask the nervous to leave the room!

The Soviet millionaire cannot be found even by the Narkomfin with its super-powerful tax apparatus. Ostap.

Take off your hats! Bare your heads! Now the removal of the body will take place! Ostap.

Rio de Janeiro is my dream and don't you dare touch it with your dirty paws!

Will have to retrain as a manager...

It was a former blind man, an impostor and a goose thief. Ostap.

I don't need an eternal needle. I don't want to live forever, I want to die. Ostap.

Comrades!... The political situation in Europe... Our answer to Chamberlain...

Beer is sold only to union members

Gasoline is yours, but our ideas! Ostap.

I am not a cherub, I have no wings, but I honor the criminal code - this is my weakness. Ostap.

You are not in the church, you will not be deceived. There will be a task. Over time. Ostap Bender

I ask the nervous to leave the room! Ostap.

Contact the worldwide sex reform league. Maybe they'll help...

Happiness waits for no one. It roams the country in long white robes, singing a children's song: Oh, America is a country, they walk and drink without a snack. But this naive baby needs to be caught, she needs to be liked, she needs to be looked after. Ostap Bender

No… This is not Rio de Janeiro. It's much worse!

Mulattos, millionaires, the cove, exporting coffee, Charleston called “My girl has a little thing”! What to talk about! Ostap.

Saw, Shura, saw!

No, this is not Rio de Janeiro! Ostap.

Well, let's get started, based on this, in the end,

That's what these Marx and Engels have done!

Ostap Ibrahimovic, when will we share our money?

I'll tell you like a family, Shura, you know how I respect you, how I love you, Shura ... Panikovsky.

Only I beg you, you do not eat raw tomatoes at night, so as not to harm the stomach ...

It's all about who the father is. I am the son of Lieutenant Schmidt...

I serve only on Saturdays. Ostap.

Money should be parted easily, without groans. Koreiko.

Our Skumbrievich confessed, he could not stand the confrontation. Let me down! Episode.

A car, comrades, is not a luxury, but a means of transportation! Ostap.

And Kozlevich?! By justice!

And the third syllable will help God to know that this is a pretext

Abroad is a myth about the afterlife. Whoever gets there does not return. Ostap Bender

The most important thing is to bring confusion to the enemy camp. The enemy must lose his mental balance. Ostap.

then such Kozlevich!? I don't know any Kozlevich!

Saw, Shura, saw! Panikovsky.

on a plate with a blue border Balaganov, you vulgar!

Fly, falcons, eagles! Ostap.

They took the girl away! Taken straight from the stall! Ostap.

Where were you brought up, Shura! Hands right away! What! Panikovsky.

Skumbrievich let us down! Couldn't stand the challenge..

Get away from me with this iron! I despise you!

Raise that goose thief

Our Black Sea branch also has its weaknesses, its problems in the assay tent, but such bureaucracy as in "Hercules"! .. Ostap.

You won't get far in this carriage of the past! Ostap.

Here I am a millionaire! So shoot me in a movie, idiot's dreams come true! Ostap.

Today, on the train and - to the West, to large cultural centers. Ostap

It was a good folder! It's a pity to give, but the money is needed! Ostap.

But, you know, I'm not a financier. I am a freelance artist and a cold philosopher...

Kozlevich was fooled by priests

Is it a plate?! - Yes Yes. With a blue border!

I need five hundred thousand and if possible at once, and not in installments. “Maybe you can still take it in parts, hmm?” Ostap, Balaganov.

Have you been to the bishop's birthday party? Ostap.

Take me, I'm good, I'll never be again! Panikovsky.

So what to do? How to get daily bread?

I am a poor student, I am a correspondence student. I do not have money! A poor childhood in Kremenchug! My uncle breastfed me! Ostap.

You are a dude, son of a dude and your children will be dudes!

Mother, let's go to the bins. Ostap.

Complete peace of mind can give a person only an insurance policy. Ostap.

Workers from you are like a sieve from a dog's tail! Ostap.

Parallel to the big world, in which big people and big things live, there is a small world with small people and small things.

Damned country! A country where a millionaire cannot take his fiancée to the cinema. Koreiko

The fact that the old will return, Koreiko never doubted. He saved himself for capitalism.

Since you live in a Soviet country, then your dreams must be Soviet. Ostap Bender

Here I am a millionaire! Dream come true idiot! Ostap Bender

What do you yell like a polar bear in warm weather? Ostap.

I will never get from you what my childhood friend Kolya Ostenbacken did from my childhood friend, the Polish beauty Inga Zayonc: he got love from her. Ostap.

Drop the bird! Drop the bird, I say! Ostap.

After getting to know your past and present, I lost faith in humanity. Isn't it worth a million rubles?!.. Ostap.

There is no Rio de Janeiro, and there is no America, and there is no Europe. There is nothing. And in general, the last city on earth is Shepetovka, on which the waves of the Atlantic Ocean break. Ostap!

You have nothing to lose but spare chains. Ostap.

Now many people forget the names of the heroes of the revolution. Ugar NEP. No more enthusiasm! Ostap.

This is the end! - This is the end of the first series, student! First series! Panikovsky, Ostap.

As a child, people like you, I killed on the spot. From a slingshot

Get up, count, you are called from the dungeon. Ostap.

A beautiful widow with Persian eyes will not sit on your grave, and crying children will not cry: “Daddy! Dad, can you hear us?!” Ostap.

Are you a thinker? What is your last name, thinker? Jean-Jacques Rousseau? Marcus Aurelius? Spinoza? Ostap.

The smaller the city, the longer the welcoming speeches. Ostap Bender

Let's hit the rally on the roads, sloppiness and bureaucracy! Ostap.

The meeting continues, gentlemen of the jury!

Maybe you want to stab me, cut my body into pieces, send me at low speed to different cities, and ferment my head in a barrel of cabbage?! So I'm against it. Ostap.

Panikovsky will sell you all, buy you and sell you again

Closer to the body, as Maupassant said! Ostap.

Do not make food a cult!

You are not descended from a monkey, like all other citizens, you are descended from a cow: you think hard. Ostap.

Keep in mind, dear Shura, I don't intend to feed you for nothing. For every vitamin I feed you, I will demand many small favors from you. Ostap Bender

Have you seen? Ta-ak! Have you seen? Everyone saw! And you saw everything too! And you have seen everything, you are all witnesses! Panikovsky.

Don't fuss! I will lead the parade!

You know the news, Adam, every citizen, even a party member, is under pressure from an atmospheric column weighing two hundred and fourteen kilos! Ostap.

Do you miss Soviet films, playing your favorite characters and their catchphrases? Today we invite you to recall the most striking fragments from the legendary film The Golden Calf. In our selection you will find the legendary phrases from the film, which are still on everyone's lips today.

The plot of the Golden Calf is a logical continuation of the Twelve Chairs. Ostap Bender, who miraculously survived the assassination attempt on him by Kisa Vorobyaninov, continues to hunt for easy money and play with fate.

This time, Ostap chooses a certain citizen Koreiko from Chernomorsk as a profit. Koreiko had an impressive wealth, but he does not want to share his million with anyone and carefully hides it. Ostap has always been distinguished by resourcefulness and ingenuity, therefore, with a lot of effort, he still manages to get the coveted million, but as it turned out, money does not bring him happiness, and in the end, Bender was simply left with nothing.

The film was shot in 1968 by director Mikhail Schweitzer based on the novel of the same name by Ilf and Petrov. The role of Ostap Bender was played by Sergei Yursky, Shura Balaganov by Leonid Kuravlyov, and Zinovy ​​Gerdt starred as Panikovsky.

Quotes

Pedestrians must be loved. Pedestrians make up the majority of humanity. Moreover, the best part of it. Pedestrians created the world.

It is not necessary to love pedestrians, it is enough just to let them through, and not to knock them down on the roads ...)

It should be noted that the car was also invented by pedestrians. But motorists somehow immediately forgot about it. Meek and smart pedestrians began to crush. The streets created by pedestrians have passed into the power of motorists.

It turns out that the one who is faster is stronger, or rather the one who is in the car ...

Your gasoline - our ideas.

So you still have to pay for gasoline ...

A car is not a luxury, but a means of transportation.

Looking at the Porsche, I actually thought so ...)

Cold soft-boiled eggs - the food is very tasteless, and a good, cheerful person will never eat them.

What does it mean that I'm bad and boring?!))

Alexander Ivanovich did not eat, but ate. He did not have breakfast, but performed the physiological process of introducing the proper amount of fats, carbohydrates and vitamins into the body.

And all these fats, carbohydrates and vitamins were not in food, but in food, right?)))

The iron horse is replacing the peasant horse.

Soon the horse will be seen only in the zoo...)

Real life flew by, trumpeting joyfully and flashing its lacquered wings.

Since you say this, it means that life has not yet passed by ...))

Workers from you are like a sieve from a dog's tail.

So I would have said: “none”, why pull the dog’s tail?)

I am an ideological fighter for banknotes!

I see that you are not only a fighter, you are also a collector of banknotes ...)

All great modern fortunes are acquired in the most dishonorable way.

It’s immediately obvious: who is poor is honest, who is rich is dishonest.

You have a car and you don't know where to go. We don't have a car. But we know where to go.

The car moves not only due to gasoline, it is also driven by ideas ...)

Socks with a double heel are not just the products of some cooperative artel of pseudo-disabled people, but a kind of symbol of a happy marriage, legalized by the registry office.

And if there were also double pantyhose, then not a single marriage would break up ...)))

I did this not in the interests of the truth, but in the interests of the truth.

And the truth and the truth, what do you think, are so far away?)

I am a freelance artist and a cold philosopher.

I might not have said it, we already noticed it ...)

By the way, about childhood. As a child, people like you, I killed on the spot. From a slingshot.

Calm down, you are not a child, you can miss ...)

He will bring me his own money, on a silver platter.

What will it bring, I have no doubt, but exactly with a blue border?)

Here I am a millionaire! Dream come true idiot!

Once again I was convinced that normal people do not become millionaires ...)

Do not knock your bald head on the parquet!

It's not me, it's all thoughts dancing ...)

With money you need to part easily, without groans.

Especially when there is nothing to part with ...)

I will lead the parade!

Sounds kinda ominous...)

You are not in the church, you will not be deceived.

Yes, they seem to go to church for the truth ...)

Have you noticed I have gray hair?
- Not.
- They will. We have great things ahead of us.

Gray hair appears during the accomplishment of great feats ... well, or dark deeds ...)))

You don't dare to touch me, I have exhaustion of the nervous system...

And I thought you had exhaustion of the mind ...

I'm old. Girls don't like me.
- Contact the Sexual Reform League.

Write a complaint, how dare they not love you at all ...)

No applause needed! The Count of Monte Cristo did not come out of me. You will have to retrain as a manager.

Are you sure that the manager of the house will come out of you?)

Fate plays the man, and the man plays the trumpet.

Because he can't play anything anymore...)

For a good person, a million is not a pity.

In general, there will be an extra million, you know - I'm a good person ...)))

Get up, count, you are called from the dungeon.

Are you sure you're right in the head?

The wreckage of a shipwreck floats in this naval borscht.

Say thank you for not cockroaches ...)

That's right, sometimes...)

When will we share our money?

What makes you think that they are also yours?))

I have a wife, children and another woman in Rostov-on-Don.

In general, soon there will be more children in Rostov-on-Don ...)

The Golden Calf, a novel by Ilya Ilf and Yevgeny Petrov, was filmed in 1968 by director Mikhail Schweitzer. The film immediately fell in love with the audience, each phrase became winged and was heard throughout the country.

Editorial Interesting to know invites you to remember some of the best quotes from the cult film.

1. "A car, comrades, is not a luxury, but a means of transportation!" Ostap

2. “Gasoline is yours, but our ideas!” Ostap

3. "As a child, people like you, I killed on the spot with a slingshot." Ostap

4. “Rio de Janeiro is the crystal dream of my childhood. Don't touch her with your paws."

5. "Comrades! .. The political situation in Europe .. Our answer to Chamberlain ..."

6. “You have to think. For example, I am fed with ideas.”

7. “There are people who do not know how to suffer, somehow it does not work out. And if they suffer, they try to do it as quickly as possible and inconspicuously to others.

8. “Keep in mind, dear Shura, I don’t intend to feed you for free. For every vitamin I feed you, I will demand many small favors from you.”

9. "People who do not read newspapers should be morally killed on the spot."

10. “In the big world, people are driven by the desire to benefit humanity. The small world is far from such lofty matters. Its inhabitants have one desire - to somehow live without feeling hungry.

11. “When I see this new life, these shifts, I don’t want to smile, I want to pray!”

12. “Saw! Saw, Shura! Saw!"

13. "You are not descended from a monkey, like all other citizens, you are descended from a cow: you think hard."

14. “He will bring me his own money, on a silver platter.”

15. “What a cold country we live in! We have everything hidden, everything is underground. A Soviet millionaire cannot be found even by the Narkomfin with its super-powerful tax apparatus.”

16. "In our vast country, an ordinary car, designed, according to pedestrians, for the peaceful transportation of people and goods, has taken on the formidable outlines of a fratricidal projectile."

17. “There is no such girl in the world who would not know, at least a week in advance, about the impending expression of feelings.”

18. "Why are you yelling like a polar bear in warm weather?"

19. "Women love: young, politically literate, long-legged .."

20. “You are a dude, the son of a dude and your children will be dudes!”

21. "Did you see? Ta-ak! Have you seen? Everyone saw! And you saw everything too! And you saw everything, you are all witnesses!”

22. “The financial abyss is the deepest of all abysses, you can fall into it all your life.”

23. "And you, Brutus, sold out to the Bolsheviks!"

24. “Here I am a millionaire! So shoot me in the movies, the dreams of an idiot came true!