How to recover from burnout at work. "I hate this job." How to understand that you are experiencing emotional burnout and it’s time to save yourself


Doctors say it is a condition in which a person feels exhausted morally, mentally and physically. It is very difficult for him to get up in the morning, to work, it is difficult to concentrate on his responsibilities and complete them on time. We have to lengthen the working day, as a result, the usual rhythm of life is disrupted and the situation worsens even more. Moreover, people tend to attribute everything to blues and depression, especially if it happens in the fall. Doctors say that it is very important to recognize the “bells” and signals of the body in order to quickly cope with the problem and not bring yourself to a nervous breakdown.

The essence of the phenomenon

Burnout syndrome is called a unique mechanism of psychological defense against stress, which occurs mainly in the work sphere. The first mention of “burnout” (literally “burnout” in English) can be found in sources dating back to 1974. This diagnosis was given to people who were forced to constantly be in an emotionally “loaded” atmosphere while working. As a result of such a load, they lost most of their physical and emotional energy, felt dissatisfaction with themselves and dissatisfaction, and lost a sense of understanding and sympathy for those people whom they were supposed to help as part of their duty.

Most often, teachers, health workers, business managers, sales representatives, social workers, etc. face this problem. The main reasons leading to emotional problems are routine, complex schedules, low wages, the desire to be the best in one’s profession, and other exhausting factors.

How to recognize

The signs of emotional burnout should be studied in detail in order to recognize the problem in time and get rid of it faster. Burnout is often confused with stress, although its clinical manifestations are somewhat different.

The picture of emotional burnout is represented by three groups of symptoms: physical, behavioral and psychological. In the first case, a person experiences:

  • Chronic fatigue syndrome
  • Headache
  • Digestive system disorders
  • Weight fluctuations
  • Sleep disorders
  • Nausea
  • Shortness of breath, etc.
As for psychological and behavioral symptoms, these include:
  • Loss of interest in one's own work
  • Unmotivated restlessness and anxiety
  • Guilt
  • Boredom and apathy
  • Diffidence
  • Suspicion
  • Increased irritability
  • Distancing from colleagues and loved ones
  • Feelings of loneliness, etc.
Also, a person susceptible to emotional burnout changes his behavior. There is almost no physical activity in his life, he increases his working hours, and he often develops bad habits.

Slow down and exhale

You shouldn’t try to overcome yourself, strain yourself and try to speed up the process of doing things, even very important ones. On the contrary, doctors are sure that if there is emotional burnout syndrome, a person needs to slow down his pace. This does not mean that you should give up doing your work, you just need to reconsider your approach to organizing your workday, adding more rest to it. If you can’t change your routine, you should ask for an emergency leave or even take sick leave for several weeks. This will allow you to analyze the situation, look at yourself from the outside and relax a little.

Planning with an analysis of the reasons will also be a great help. For example, if it is difficult to complete certain tasks, it is worth specifying in a conversation with your superiors what exactly is required of the employee; if you are not happy with the salary, you need to talk to management about an increase or try to look for another employment option. Such measures will allow you to learn how to set priorities, make it possible to understand who can help, and will be an excellent help in preventing new breakdowns.

How to warn

Prevention is also an excellent solution. It is worth remembering that this syndrome usually occurs against the background of physical and mental exhaustion of a person. This means that prevention issues should be approached comprehensively. An excellent solution would be a balanced diet with a minimum of fat, including a large amount of vitamins, fiber and minerals. It is also worth adding more physical activity and good sleep into your life. Of course, you also need to follow a daily routine.

From the point of view of psychological protection, you should give yourself a day off once a week, when you can do everything that you really want. In addition, meditation, auto-training and aromatherapy will be an excellent assistant in restoring mental balance.

When I hear about emotional (professional) burnout, I remember an old story. I don’t know what is true in it and what is fiction. What I bought for is what I sell for!

The boy's parents gave him a chameleon. He placed a red piece of paper under it, and the chameleon immediately began to show red camouflage spots. "Wow!" - said the boy and placed a sheet of blue paper on the chameleon. The chameleon immediately changed its color. And this cruel children's game continued for a long time. The chameleon changed its war paint a thousand times, and then stopped changing it. He got tired, froze, stopped breathing and died.

Reaction to stress

Stressful situation- this is a situation of threat or rapid, abrupt, unexpected changes for a person. Positive or negative is not so important in this case. It is important that it is fast and unexpected.

Stressful state- this is how a person reacts to a sudden change in the situation. Essentially, changes in our state are simply a response to changes around us. In the heat, our body sweats, actively releasing water, cooling itself. Until the water in the body runs out. And in the cold, the whole body trembles, trying to warm up, while there is energy for this trembling.

There are three human reactions to rapid change: hit, run, freeze. These are very ancient, archaic reactions. Perhaps primitive man invented them as soon as he began to walk on two legs.

  • If the enemy is weaker, strike and secure a peaceful sky above your head and additional loot.
  • If the enemy is stronger - "Run, Forrest, run..." and ensure your salvation and survival.
  • If you can't do either one or the other, freeze. Some predators do not feed on carrion and do not pay attention to stationary objects. This is how you will be saved.

The puzzle of our joyful and eventful life is that drastic changes are constantly happening around us. The change of day and night alone is worth it! You just crawled out from under the blanket, just washed your face, just exposed your sides to the ray of sunshine, and then - bam - it’s already a pitch-dark night! And I won’t even talk about the change of seasons - spring, summer, autumn, winter. This is clear to everyone.

Accordingly, we are constantly adapting, constantly spending our resources, our energy on this adaptation. Even the most modern cell phone needs to recharge its battery from time to time. And what can we say about the person! He also needs replenishment of resources.

Situation one. If resource costs are replenished in a timely manner, then exhaustion and death do not occur. Life goes on. There is joy in life. And if not? Then things are bad. Exhaustion and even illness are not far away.

Situation two. Many of our aggressive or sexually charged actions are taboo and are under the vigilant control of the all-powerful and all-seeing Big Brother - society (starting with parents, educators and teachers). You can't fight. Taking what you want to take right now is prohibited. Crying, making noise and eating gingerbread in one person is indecent. What about the rights of our sovereigns to declare? God forbid! Good boys and girls don’t do this at all. Not accepted here. One word - culture! At first, the child learns to walk and talk, and then to sit and remain silent.

The habit of freezing, of not outwardly expressing what is happening inside, can become a very bad habit. Overvoltage, which has not found a way out or release, accumulates in the body, poisons and destroys our body, and over time turns into bodily blocks and clamps. The body also spends a huge amount of energy maintaining blocks and clamps. In addition, we cease to belong to ourselves. We forget who we really are. We become a cog in a mechanism that is alien to us. And we solemnly call all this “work” (from the word “slavery”).

And the most important thing here is to notice in time that something wrong is happening to you. And take action in time.

Signs of burnout

  1. Do you enjoy any break in work? like a child eating chocolate. “Is the electricity in the office turned off? What a joy! Let's smoke bamboo! If half of the posts on your social media page are filled with passionate desire, literally lust for the Friday carnival and bacchanalia, and the second half of the posts are about the funeral mood of Monday, it’s time to urgently pay attention to yourself and your condition.
  2. You, with a constancy worthy of better use, with your whole being you feel the meaninglessness of what is happening around you. Every day is like Groundhog Day. Got up alive, went to work, came back dead, went to bed. Tomorrow will be a day no better than today. What am I doing here? Why do I need all this? Who benefits from this? Who needs all this? My company commander sternly looked at the formation of us, worn-out soldiers, and said with a sigh: “Oh, routine!”
  3. Fatigue and heaviness throughout the body become almost a permanent state of yours.

I remember a bearded joke:

- Why are you so sad?
- Is it really fun to carry bags of cement to the 17th floor without an elevator?
- How long have you been like this?

- I’ll start tomorrow...

  1. Even when there is an opportunity to relax, switch gears, go on vacation or spend a day off in the company of carefree friends, a person cannot take full advantage of this. At work he dreams of relaxation. And, while on vacation, he thinks about work.“I have my phone with me even in the pool, because I have a responsible job, they can call me at any minute.”. And this is not said by a bodyguard, not a fireman, but by the director of the company. Because the people around you cannot tolerate the idea that you belong only to yourself and rest. “Don’t just sit on the toilet, think about something”.
  2. You notice that you are too lazy to amuse yourself, entertain yourself, you have no strength for emotions. There is no strength to be angry at the stupidity of your superiors or subordinates. I don't have the strength to enjoy my birthday. The usual rock music concert, where you used to have a blast, is now annoying with its grinding, causing a feeling of drowsiness, lethargy, foggy vision, stuffy ears and complete devastation. Indifference and insensitivity to emotional signals is a very alarming sign. This is already an SOS signal.
  3. If you used to endure any flu on your feet, without taking time off, now the slightest increase in temperature is perceived as a disaster, you lie flat, without raising your head from the pillows, exhausting your household with the pitiful moan of a hypochondriac.
  4. It's stalking you pursued by irritability. All the people around you “either they sit wrong or they whistle wrong”. As Gromozeka used to say: “I ordered four hundred drops of valerian, but here it’s four hundred and two.”. But before, these were pleasant and helpful people in all respects. They couldn’t all just take it and change at once. This means only one thing - that you are tired! And it’s time to take yourself and your condition seriously.

How to help yourself: the simplest solutions

The simplest thing is to organize an event for yourself, or even better, several events that you know are pleasant and definitely fill you up and recharge your batteries. Some people visit a temple, some look for a place of power, some go out into nature and turn off their phones. Someone fills a karaoke bar with nightingale trills, someone goes to the bathhouse with friends. And for some, just a sweet sleep or a delicious meal in pleasant company is a great switch and adventure. Maybe you just need to get some sleep...

The essence of the solution: an obviously pleasant pastime, by definition, does not require adaptive reactions or energy expenditure from you. On the contrary, it charges you with habitually pleasant experiences and serves as a psychological stroke for yourself.

  1. Let off steam. It is very important not to keep it to yourself, to react, to express your tensions, your emotions. Yes, you can’t shout in your boss’s face - you could lose your job. But, as soon as the meeting is over, you urgently need to go to the nearest sports ground and give free rein to your muscles and vocal cords.

Many grown-ups don’t play football to win or score goals. The main thing for them is to shout. They run around the field the whole game, waving their arms, shouting at the top of their lungs: “You idiot, where are you going to hit me, I’m standing open right in front of the gate...” They run, jump, and return home or to the office tired but happy.

The essence of the solution: burn down at the physiological level the adrenaline that is caused by a stressful situation, so that it does not accumulate and destroy the delicate balance of substances in the body. Regularity in this matter, as you yourself understand, significantly increases the usefulness of the procedure.

  1. Emotional stroking. For women, a very good procedure for throwing out the negativity that poisons their lives, depleting their resources, to speak out and ease their souls in a safe space is a meeting of the women’s council, or simply a bachelorette party.

The action is often very, very expressive and theatrical. “Girls, can you imagine what my boss told me yesterday?!” And then there are 18 exclamation marks for three words of text. And in response: "What?"- and then 18 question and exclamation marks. “And that’s what!” And so on in a circle. In a couple of hours, they will wash the bones of all their boyfriends, bosses, subordinates, girlfriends, and rivals.

No advice, no expert opinions, no solutions. Only the exchange of emotional signs of sympathy and support, or, as smart psychologists say, the exchange of psychological strokes. They will get up from the table or the sofa, and the tension will be gone. Like sand through your fingers, like water in the sand, tensions and resentments evaporated. Everyone felt better.

The essence of the solution: in a chronic stressful situation, in a state of exhaustion, self-esteem very often suffers ( “I can’t cope!”, “I’m not competent enough!”, “I can’t help it!” etc.). Psychological strokes: attention, sympathy, sharing pain and resentment among all interlocutors, warm words of support - inspire women, restore their opinion of themselves, and they are again ready to enjoy life in all its manifestations.

But in difficult cases, of course, you need the help of a professional.

What do you encounter in your practice?

The man has driven himself to the brink, crawled to the therapist half-bent, and cannot even breathe deeply. And he already knows the diagnosis: “Doctor, I’m burning out!”

I offer such clients a minimum program: it is necessary to work out the life situation in several important aspects.

By the way, you can do this yourself. All tips are given below.

  1. Eliminate energy leakage.

Eliminating “vampirism” means clearing the space around you, freeing yourself from relationships with people who “they like to eat me, but not very much”. Is it easy to do? Of course it's not easy. But you need to take at least the first step.

Solution. To do this, you need to find a safe place where no one will distract you from the process, turn on your imagination, imagine in your mind’s eye a specific person who really annoyed you, and tell him: “Dear comrade, I came to talk. And the question is very serious, it concerns my health, happiness and success. I suspect that some of my energy constantly goes to you. I do not like it. I am categorically against it. I am not your donor, sponsor or soup kitchen. I'm just your colleague. Today I’m ending such an exploitative relationship with you, I’m returning my energy to myself, I’m returning yours to you, I don’t need someone else’s. If you want to communicate, let’s communicate without manipulation, without use and exploitation, on a mutually beneficial basis. I don’t burn bridges, today I’m ending bad relationships and inviting you to new relationships, to cooperation.”

  1. Get rid of guilt.

The fact is that it is impossible to force a person to simply donate his time, energy and other resources to someone. As a rule, a person begins to give away his resources left and right under the pressure of a feeling of guilt or debt. It is necessary to get to the root of these feelings and transform the situation.

Solution. You can firmly and decisively say to yourself: "Im free person. I am the author of my life. I'll do it as I want. As I do, so it will be. It's up to me to decide. This is my life and only my life. My energy belongs to me and only me by birthright. I am not guilty of anyone. I do not owe anything to anyone. I won’t allow anyone to steal my resources.”

  1. Get out of the wrong roles.

A daughter or son cannot replace the mother of a husband, lover, brother or sister, father or mother, or unborn children. A daughter or son cannot be a container for the unprocessed negative feelings of a mother or father. A daughter or son cannot follow the goals of their parents and completely forget about their own. This is at least unnatural. They can't do it. But in childhood, parents assign many additional roles to the child, thus solving their psychological problems.

“I’m so worried that my first-born boy died in childbirth, you, daughter, will replace him in everything!”- the daughter absorbs this unconscious message from her mother from a young age. And the role of the dead is not a pound of raisins. This is a risk that symptoms of burnout will haunt the girl from childhood. The dead don't jump, don't run, don't make noise, don't have fun. They lie quietly.

Solution. You can imagine your parents in your mind's eye and tell them clearly and decisively: “Dear parents, dad and mom, I am only your son or your daughter. I can't replace anyone else for you. I can't solve your problems for you. I am not Atlas who holds your sky. I need to mind my own business. I will go".

  1. Get rid of imposed beliefs and suggestions.

Sayings from relatives: “A little bit of good,” “We haven’t lived well, so there’s nothing to start with,”- only at first glance they are harmless. If they call you a pig a thousand times, you will grunt. If a negative statement is said many times, even just in passing, it can become a belief and become lodged in the brain like a monolithic block.

A negative template is harmful precisely because it turns into a kind of filter that recolors the color of life in its own way. “The city became emerald after all residents were given glasses with green lenses.”. In the same way, you can make your whole life hopelessly gray by simply installing a gray filter. It is very useful to notice the manifestations of such limiting filter-beliefs and return them to where they came from.

Solution. You can remember who you first heard a negative phrase from, and return what you heard back. “Dear grandfather, today I return to you your conviction and your saying “little by little is good”. It's only yours. You have the right to your opinion and your way of life. I respect your choice. And I myself will live my life and follow my convictions. My new belief: “Every day I accept with joy and gratitude all the gifts of the universe. Every day I use more and more diverse resources for my benefit. Every day the effectiveness of my actions is growing. Every day my results are getting better and better. Every day I increase my ability to enjoy and enjoy life. It is my choice. This is my life. I'll do it as I want. As I do, so it will be.”

  1. Formulate and test your personal goals and plans.

Among other things, it is very important for self-help in a situation of burnout to clearly clarify your goals, plans and priorities. They set the vector of movement. They concentrate their forces. They prevent interference from interfering. They discipline both themselves and the people around them.

And setting goals and developing priorities begins with simple introspection. Do I like what I'm doing now? Do I want to be where I am now? Am I ready to continue communicating with this person, does it burden me or fill me?

The actually formulated goal consists of several important elements:

  1. What to me I do not like in my life now (here it is important to get angry in a good sense of the word).
  2. What exactly I want to achieve in the near future (specifics are very appropriate here).
  3. Trajectory of movement between them (a list of tasks and actions tied to deadlines is very appropriate here).

The essence of the solution: When you have clear and conscious goals and priorities in your life, it is very easy for you to say no to everything unnecessary, to everything that distracts you from the main thing. Professor Preobrazhensky from Bulgakov’s “Heart of a Dog” gave an excellent example of rebuffing parasites and parasites:

“I would like to suggest you,” here the woman pulled out several bright and snow-wet magazines from her bosom, “to take several magazines in favor of the children of Germany.” About fifty dollars a piece.

“No, I won’t take it,” Philip Philipovich answered briefly, glancing sideways at the magazines.

Complete amazement was expressed on their faces, and the woman became covered with a cranberry coating.

- Why do you refuse?

- Don't want.

-You don’t sympathize with the children of Germany?

- Sorry.

- Do you regret fifty dollars?

- No.

- So why?

- Don't want.

It’s just that the professor knew exactly his priorities. He himself knew and told us to know. For a better life. An easy, beautiful, healthy, happy, rich life!

what to do if work is already very annoying, but you still have to go to the office? Will a vacation in a sanatorium help if stress even affects libido? kyky, together with Belarus guide vetliva, asked psychologist Sergei Khonsky the most popular questions: how to survive emotional burnout, not go crazy and keep your job, having managed to put a trash can on your boss’s head.

Emotional burnout begins due to repeated stress, frequent tension, and sometimes simply due to repetition of stereotypical operations. A person may not work anywhere, but will burn out from caring for a paralyzed relative. At some point, there are simply no longer enough resources to overcome the crisis.

Those who communicate a lot with people are most susceptible to burnout. Initially, it was believed that medical workers were the most “burnout” category. Why? A large flow of people, colleagues, plus frequent trials, complaints from clients - all this is reinforced by the lack of normal payment. But now many professions are related to communication. Everyone has an equal chance to earn this burnout. It is no longer possible to say that a programmer constantly works behind a monitor, does not go anywhere, does not communicate with anyone, and therefore will be less susceptible to emotional burnout. Even communication with loved ones can be the cause of burnout.

I'm tired of work, but I can't leave. What to do?

You need to find out if the organization has a psychologist. If this is not the case, how can the employee protect himself? Sometimes these are banal “reacting” techniques: a client or boss is rude to you - try to visualize how you throw something at him, put a trash can on his head. If you start expressing all this to his face, you may even lose your job. If now is not the situation when you can leave, and you need money, you have to work with your emotional competence.

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There is a situation of “reacting” of a different kind: if the working day is over, try not to take the work with you, but devote time to yourself. It’s good if a person plays sports - this is a channel for the release of unreacted energy. By analogy, some aggressors who work with children suggest giving them foam toys. It is important here: a) develop the skill of switching, b) evaluate your emotions, and c) learn to cope with these emotions.

Offices of successful IT companies are best suited for preventing burnout. People even have a separate lounge there. And in one Russian bank, employees have a so-called “screaming room” - after a difficult client, they can come there and scream in a soundproofed room, beat a pear, throw darts.

You can invite a person coming to the workplace to virtually try on a mask. In the Netherlands this is called "workwear technique". Can you imagine: today, let’s say, I’m not Anya, and I’m not 27 years old, I’m Oksana, I’m 40, I’m a mother of three children. And all day long you behave like this Oksana. You are trying to copy non-existent elements of her behavior. The day ends - you are Anya again. Such a banal technique allows you to separate the personal self and the professional self. It will be useful to everyone, especially to trust service employees or rescuers.

Sanatorium “Praleska” is the closest sanatorium to Minsk. It is only 8 kilometers from the city. You will have time to get there and not burn out completely from your burnout.

In general, the greatest punishment for a person is to entrust him with meaningless work. A person with a high level of awareness will understand: do it or don’t do it – it won’t lead to anything anyway. These are banal words, but we need to learn to ask ourselves simple questions: “What do I want?”, “What is my goal?”, “What motivates me?”, “What is my purpose?” If all the answers lead to the idea that you cannot achieve any of your goals at work, then it’s time to leave.

What should I do if I'm already starting to burn out?

Firstly. Take a break from the area in which you are burning out. Not everyone's problems are related to work. If a person is involved in computers or sales, then his hobby should not be in any way connected with computer games or traveling to conferences. The hobby should be radically different.

Secondly. You will need autogenous training - perhaps now is the time to take up yoga.

Third. Connect with friends from whom you can get an emotional response. Discussing an exciting topic leads to a decrease in the release of the hormone cortisol, which is responsible for stress. Friends, family, children are a good way to both prevent and combat emotional burnout.

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Fourthly. Take courses and trainings that develop stress management skills and emotional intelligence. Learn to manage your emotions.

In the Yunost sanatorium, you can extinguish the flames of your burnout with water from the Zaslavsky reservoir. In addition, there is the Transfiguration Church of the Savior from almost the 16th century and the Church of the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary from the 18th century nearby. Look at the sights.

Fifthly. Read about stress-productive eating. Fatty foods rich in vitamins and minerals can also save you from burnout. Some people advise eating foods that remind us of childhood: those containing vanilla, such as cookies or milk. Our olfactory brain is very ancient, so experts recommend aromatherapy and even animal therapy - communication with animals.

At sixth. Engage in bodily practices. It can be difficult for us to relax due to elementary stiffness in the body. Massages and baths, for example, in a sanatorium, allow you to remove such clamps.

Seventh. Have sex. Sexual relationships are one way to resist burnout, as long as they do not carry difficult emotions. But that is another story.

Eighth. Approach the problem consciously - regular or one-time meetings with a psychologist are unlikely to harm you.

How to learn to relax if you are so burned out that you don’t want anything

A short-term vacation will help you avoid problems and never hear about burnout again. But this is only if, upon returning from vacation and finding himself in the same environment, a person changes something in his work. Going away even for three days is an effective method for dealing with any stress. Moreover, three days is the minimum we need. Often any unfamiliar environment helps: it could be a village, a new city, a sanatorium. It is not necessary to purchase a large package of procedures at this sanatorium. Even geographical distance from the stressor that causes burnout is already beneficial.

Fatigue is a physiological state. Fatigue is a psychological assessment of what is happening to us. Sometimes fatigue goes away without fatigue. That is, the body is tired, worn out - this is expressed in colds, joint pain, fever - we do not attach any importance to this. For example, you have a very cool job, and you don’t want to leave your team even while on sick leave. You do not notice the signals of fatigue and continue to perform your function, constantly encountering stress. It is very important to pay attention to signs from the body that were not there before: colds, stomach problems, joint pain.

“Energetik” is your option if you really need to catapult from the city into nature. Sosnovy Bor, next to the large Volpyanskoe reservoir... Well, if nature tires you, you can always escape to Grodno - look at the Farny Church, or take a walk along the bar street.

You have to watch how what you used to be passionate about, what you could move mountains for, suddenly ceased to be important and interesting. You should ask yourself the question: why am I not interested in this now? Why am I not showing the same results? You may realize that you are just sitting too long and need a higher jump. Although, if a person is already truly burnt out, it will be difficult for him to even ask himself these questions. Then you need to be more attentive to outside assessments. If everyone around you is telling you that you look tired, it's time to listen to people.

Do alcohol and sex help relieve stress?

Many people say that they can relax and forget themselves only by drinking alcohol. Few people know that after a small dose of alcohol, a state of mild euphoria lasts 8-10 minutes. Next comes the depressive phase. This is not so obvious to us, but others notice that at this moment we want to complain about life and talk about how bad everything is for us. If no one is around, then we digest the negativity within ourselves. Of course, we can drink more to experience euphoria again, but most often this does not lead to anything good. I'm not saying that alcohol should be eliminated, but it should not be considered as a way of coping with emotional burnout. If a person realizes that only alcohol helps him to distract himself, then this is already a signal that he needs professional help.

The Ruzhansky sanatorium is located far from Minsk - as much as 240 kilometers. On the other hand, maybe this is good? Distance heals. And a holiday here will obviously cost less than an alcoholic weekend in Vilnius.

Sex is good prevention. But if burnout has already occurred, then sex may not happen. And no change for the better will happen until we find the root of the problem. Problems with libido can just happen due to burnout. If your libido drops, bring something new into your life, go somewhere on vacation with your partner. It is quite possible that in a home in which everything reminds you of work (if that is where you experience stress), you may have problems even in bed.

The main thing: you can experiment as much as you like, but without working through the problem, the effect of novelty will not last long. Over time, a person may begin to evaluate this side of his life as dull and uninteresting. And this is already a dead end, or rather, a reason to go to a psychologist.

How to stop freaking out and learn to live

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Sooner or later, a person may develop depersonalization - he does not express emotions in any way, he may not emotionally connect to the outside world. Neurotic states and emotional breakdowns can often occur. In addition to depersonalization, a reduction in professional responsibilities may occur - then you begin to do everything carelessly, and the motivational sphere suffers. But while some emotions disappear, others, on the contrary, become sharper and appear more often. For example, a person more often experiences uncharacteristic anger. The most severe clinical forms of burnout are associated with nervous exhaustion. Here both motivation and the function of expressing emotions really suffer.

“Primorsky” - Located on the shores of the Minsk Sea - such a pleasant self-deception for those who really want to be “at the sea”.

We can “play the rollercoaster” for a long time: burnout increases - we go on vacation, it seems like the problem goes away, manifests itself in a hidden form. Then work resumes. Not even three months have passed, and we are again approaching a borderline emotional state, because we have not worked through the first problem. We become even more susceptible to burnout.

Many of us feel that there are few sources of joy in life. Not everyone can even answer the question: “What does it mean to rejoice?” There is a book “Joy on Demand”, the author of which explains that you also need to be able to rejoice. We sometimes don't pay attention to small events simply because we can't even imagine that there is a source of joy in them. Sometimes a stranger can become an example for us, a “teacher of joy.” Agree, we don’t know how to rejoice alone. Events can be much more fun if there are two, three, or four of us. Have you noticed that we offer courses in anger management, overcoming fears and advanced training? But no one teaches us to rejoice. And in vain.

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When a person takes on too many responsibilities, strives for ideals in work and relationships, and at the same time experiences constant stress, his strength can be depleted. Then he begins to feel inferior, loses interest in everything that happens around him, becomes lethargic and apathetic. Symptoms such as irritability, anger, depression, and a feeling of lack of time may also appear. The result is a deterioration in the quality of life, illness, nervous breakdowns. Career is under threat, family is almost destroyed, there is no desire to do anything... What is this?

Psychologists call this state emotional (or professional) burnout. In scientific terms, emotional burnout syndrome (from English burnout - literally “exhaustion of physical and spiritual strength”) is a condition characterized by a gradual increase in fatigue and overwork, indifference to one’s responsibilities at home and at work, a feeling of one’s own failure and incompetence in the profession.

The Pursuit of Happyness

On CT scans of people exposed to long-term stressors, large white spaces may be seen where brain tissue would normally be. Nightmare? Probably evolution.

The problem is that humans were not designed to live at the fast pace of the 21st century. The body simply does not have a huge reserve of ability to withstand chronic stress. And why were they needed before? Even in the Middle Ages, rarely anyone lived to be 35 years old. This is probably why we resist stress well when we are young. But our “protective system” is not designed for a longer period.

In recent years, even the much-loved American dream has been crumbling, and those who strived for it have been thrown to the margins of life. People become disillusioned and their anger and resentment turn into self-destructive behavior. “Burn everything with fire! Life has failed, and I’m giving up trying!” - people who experience all the delights of emotional burnout argue in this vein.

But our grandparents perceived life differently. However, then it was more predictable. They knew how to be happy and enjoy life, although they understood that it was impossible to be in high spirits all the time.

Cure for stress

According to statistics, the less we strive for career growth, the happier we feel. Moreover, people who focus on financial well-being are more disappointed in their work and family life than others. What to do if there are only problems around? How to overcome stress?

1. Admit you are facing difficulties.

Don't beat yourself up. Recognizing the problem means half winning the battle. Sometimes we think that everything is our fault. But let me point out: the modern world sometimes places too high demands on everyone, so it’s normal to burn out.

2. Ask your loved ones for help

3. Regain your hope

Relax - you won't become rich by age 40, and Prince Charming has a boyfriend. That's it, the fight is over. You set the bar too high and worked too hard. But life is not over there: the goal was simply unrealistic.

4. Find an outlet

Whatever way you choose to deal with the vicious circle of stress, there is always a chance to break it. Meditation, physical education, changing views, new goals, openness to the world - any positive change can set in motion a spiral of adaptation, when each subsequent change strengthens what has been achieved. Our reaction to a positive event makes something else more likely - good attracts good.

5. Develop awareness

Try to monitor your thoughts and feelings. Anger often masks fear, and jealousy can be an expression of insecurity. Do not give in to impulses, but focus on deeper and, most importantly, true feelings and motives for your behavior.

6. Don't give in to emotional impulses

Do you want to take a sedative or get drunk at the nearest bar? Don't give in to your immediate desires! Wait 10-15 minutes, and then think again - do you need it?

Before you argue with your boss or be rude to your family, step aside and calm down. You will certainly regret your rash action. It's better to warn him!

7. Play sports

Movement changes thoughts. Make it a rule to go to the gym twice a week, swim or run. Ride horses, walk, play tennis - anything to take your mind off bad thoughts.

Instead of a conclusion

And one last thing. When you really can't bear it, develop an escape plan. Take a long-term vacation or look for another job altogether. Go on a trip or talk to your family about moving to another city. Just remember: “This too shall pass.”

Based on materials from the book “The Psychology of Bad Habits” by Richard O’Connor

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Crazy people are those who spend their whole lives doing nothing but have no strength and no purpose.
Marcus Aurelius

New Job- it is always a source of new hopes, a look full of confidence into a wonderful future full of career achievements. But some time passes, and something inside suddenly changes. Instead of the pleasure that we received in the first months of work, some strange apathy comes. Every morning it becomes more and more difficult to get up from such a soft and cozy bed, and the alarm clock turns from an assistant into an executioner.

What happened? It seems that career growth is still promised, and the salary is good and the team is the same. But the obsessive thought that you need to run away from this company, wherever you look, does not leave your head. What it is? Is it really time to quit, or should this obsession be curbed and not interfere with your professional development?

Well, before answer To answer this question, you need to sit down at the table, take a minute in complete silence and answer the questions in detail in writing to yourself:

1. Is this the kind of job I expected when I joined the company?
2. What exactly is wrong?
3. How significant are the differences? Is it worth leaving because of them?

First question- the simplest one, most people with the described problem will answer negatively. No! This is not what we expected. Somewhere we were deceived, and big time. But the second question is much more tricky and complex. If you suddenly find that there are no actual changes between what you expected and what you received, then this is a reason to assume that you are “burned out.” The third question is of a clarifying nature. You understand, if you were promised twenty-two days of rest a year, but were given only twenty, but they promised to add two next year, this is a dubious reason for leaving.

But what does it mean - " burn out"? This is a scientific term introduced by Herbert Freudenberg back in the eighties. Initially, it described a syndrome that occurs in people whose profession is to professionally help other people. For example, nurses, psychiatrists (and any doctors in general), social workers Over time, their work begins to drain them emotionally, which causes problems with sleep, and their psyche is protected by cynicism, which results in hatred of everyone around them, primarily the clients themselves.

But with time syndrome Burnout has become characteristic of many other professions. This is due to the ever-increasing workload on any average office worker. A psychological breakdown occurs when, without any serious objective reasons, a person begins to receive only irritation, disappointment and depression from his once beloved work.

What to do? First, you need to minimize and eliminate all the reasons that lead to this very burnout. For example, deal with excessive load. Explain to your bosses and colleagues that if you continue to be loaded like this, you will simply break down and have to quit. Stop constantly taking work home, stop thinking about it in your free time. Occupational hygiene is very important, so do not neglect it. Strictly forbid yourself to sit in front of the TV in the evening, while simultaneously checking the latest report, corresponding with a similarly workaholic colleague about tomorrow’s plans, and the like. You need to throw out everything from your bedroom that is somehow related to work. Simply turn off your phone when you get home, make it your principle.


As mentioned above, burnout leads to an avalanche-like leap of cynicism in a person and he begins to behave like an entrance guard embittered with his life. If you have never seen such a watchman, then try going to the nearest city clinic. There you will easily find some doctor, in whose eyes you can clearly read how much he hates you and everyone else sitting in line, stupid donkeys and idiots. Therefore, cynicism should be taken in moderation. Feel free to tell yourself “it’s none of my business” from time to time and stop helping the client “beyond the norm.” You are not a titan and you need to protect your kind calf heart so that it does not burn to the ground, turning into a nasty cinder that hates all living things.

Have you heard of neurobics? For now, get acquainted with this section of mental hygiene. And with mental hygiene in general. Monotony and routine are very harmful to our brain; they literally kill our very desire for life. It is because of the routine that many factory workers become drunkards, and it is because of the routine that those who have to work on the assembly line are so unhappy. Introduce something new into your day, stop walking the same routes to work, drinking the same coffee at the same time. Start doing something stupid like why not start writing with your left hand? The development of ambidexterity (equal use of both hands) is an excellent, professionally recommended remedy for daily routine and the harmonious development of both hemispheres of the brain.

Spend more time rest. It also needs to be diversified. Spending every evening watching TV series is not a vacation, but just another additional job. In your free time, think about what you would like to do. Read materials about various types of outdoor activities, educational articles on this topic. Even if nothing comes to mind right away, over time you will become eager to do something “like that.”

It would be a good idea to increase the total number recreation, if possible. Is this Saturday worth what you get for your overtime? Maybe try to do without it, at least for a couple of months? If you don’t like it, come back for a six-day week, but for now try to rest two days a week, because your psyche really needs it.

And only if a couple of months of all this therapy didn’t help at all, you can start looking for reasons in some objective factors. Perhaps leaving this job for a new one will indeed be a good decision for you. You certainly shouldn’t push yourself to the detriment of your own health. Neither money nor career are worth it.

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