My wife pisses me off, I knew that. A wife annoys her husband: what she should NOT do. Childhood memory

My husband is angry: what should I do?

Olga(32), married 10 years

Ten years of family life is only at first glance an impressive period. In the daily routine - housekeeping, children, repairs, etc. - time is somehow compressed, there is no feeling of such duration. And suddenly, in my eighth year, it dawned on me: we like different films, cities, vacations, and so on. That is, we are generally different people from each other. At first the discovery surprised me: it seemed that it was obvious before, I just didn’t pay attention. And then I began to notice all the small details, which as a result added up to a large mountain of complaints, the main one of which sounded like “you don’t see a woman in me.” The conclusion from these thoughts was simple - it was probably time to look for an apartment and get a divorce. In general, almost everything was clear to me.

The direction of our conversation with the psychologist began to change with Katya’s question: “Why are you contacting me and not a realtor?” This is where the raking of the entire pile of accumulated claims and the search for an answer began. As a result, we came to a conclusion that was quite unexpected for me: my husband’s behavior mirrors my own. That is, most likely, he also has the same bunch of claims against me. The only thing we couldn’t get to the bottom of was why the switch went off, one day forcing us to focus on our partner’s shortcomings.

Ekaterina Ignatova, transactional analyst: It happens that a person comes to therapy who has thought through and formulated a request in advance. He, for example, could realize that he was constantly stepping on the same rake. Or he just can’t achieve what he wants. Or he is very afraid of something. In cases where the request is obvious, work can begin immediately. However, with Olga the situation turned out to be different. She talked for a long time about how her husband stopped understanding her, that they had more separate things than they had in common, but at the same time she could not understand for herself what she wanted from therapy.

At some point, when we started talking about Olga’s feelings, tears appeared in her eyes. The decisive and reasonable girl disappeared - in her place appeared a confused, completely unhappy girl who could not find any cause-and-effect relationships, she simply felt bad. She began to complain that she was constantly forced to bend under everyone, and therefore was very tired. And this is where we decided to start our next meeting.

If your husband is annoying...

Anna(27), married 10 years

I came to a psychologist in a state of complete impasse: we have been married for 10 years, but have never learned to understand each other. The husband is not at all interested in children, for him there is only work. He does not see or understand our needs. He believes that since he makes money, we should treat him as the center of the universe. Many aspects of his behavior are annoying. I’ve even started to think - maybe I’m doing something wrong? I don’t understand why my family life isn’t working out. I hoped that the psychologist would give some outside perspective on the situation, because from the inside it is not always clear whether it is possible to change anything at all.

I received the necessary help during the consultation process. Marina gave some practical advice that was actually obvious, but it would never have occurred to me to use it myself. In general, there are already positive changes, which is nice. One session, of course, is not enough for serious changes, but at least I understood where to move.

Why does my husband get angry? Psychologist's opinion

Marina Aksenova, psychologist: The first impression of Anya is that she is sweet, open, and ready to cooperate. But the process of establishing contact turned out to be difficult - there was a sense of distance and the presence of barriers, as if invisibly put up by the client and reflecting her isolation. In addition, Anya came for a consultation with a small child, who naturally required attention and care. This also became an obstacle to focusing on the situation. Perhaps her relationship with her husband is formed in a similar way. It's hard to understand each other when there are constant distractions.

We discussed many issues: how communication with your spouse develops, how feelings are expressed, how contact is established, what expectations there are,
both and so on. And I came to the conclusion that one of the reasons for Anya’s husband’s “not like that” behavior may lie in the area of ​​unclear relationships between husband and wife. Perhaps it is also a matter of ignorance of each other. The following complaints from my client became obvious: lack of understanding, need for support, including moral, and sometimes too directive behavior of her husband, which is perceived by the girl as aggression. The relationship of this couple can be characterized as “confrontation”: as if Anya unconsciously perceives her husband as an adversary, in some ways even an enemy. There is also a fear of dissolving, of losing oneself, which often happens in family life. For Anya, as a sensitive and vulnerable person, it is important to find her own corner, activities separate from the family in which she can develop. Now the girl mainly realizes herself as a mother. But she wants to feel wanted, needed, interesting, beautiful - in a word, a Woman. True, she expresses this need through the maternal part. It is important that Anya’s attention is directed not only to the children, but also to the spouse: for example, organize a trip to a cafe or cinema together - where you can be alone with each other, feel not only like parents, but also a man and a woman.

In this session we focused on Anya's relationship with her husband. But then I would try to understand the conflict with him as an external reflection of my client’s internal conflict. It’s as if there are two parts in Anya that are warring with each other. One is more passive, vulnerable, sacrificial, the other is active, even tough and aggressive, unwilling to understand and accept what is happening, striving to establish its own rules. It is necessary to find out what these parts are, what role they play, how they live and interact. At first glance, this is an internal inconsistency of feelings, needs, desires, expectations, misunderstanding and, in some ways, non-acceptance of oneself.

The longer we talked, the more I felt how vulnerable and sensitive Anya was, how she needed personal space, and sometimes loneliness. And how difficult it is for her to express these feelings - for fear that they will be devalued. In many ways, the girl does not feel whole and firmly on her feet - it is important to understand this and work on.

Husband pisses me off: another story

Natalia(34), married 15 years

I came to the psychologist not just with abstract dissatisfaction with family life - after all, we have a very solid experience. There was a specific problem - my husband’s betrayal. I didn’t know what to do in this situation - either forgive, or turn around and leave. It’s one thing to have a hypothetical attitude towards your husband’s infidelity, and quite another to face it in reality. Of course, I experienced very strong emotions, primarily misunderstanding and anger. And she chose the wrong path: she began to delve into herself, looking for shortcomings.

I left the psychologist with a feeling of incredible lightness: it seemed that we had solved the main problem, set priorities, and I had an understanding of what direction to move next. It was very comfortable. But by evening it became so bad, it was as if I had been hit on the head with a butt. Again there was a feeling of hopelessness, a dead end. The next day, the feeling of comfort, oddly enough, returned. But I don’t delude myself: I understand that one visit is not enough - to change something, you need to continue to work on yourself.

What to do if your husband is annoying. Expert opinion

Zhanna Sergeeva, analytical psychologist: The feeling of being stuck is exactly the state in which a person often comes to a psychologist. Usually it is associated with a midlife crisis, when previous sensations are exhausted, tasks are completed, and the second half of life begins, which has completely different goals - for example, knowing oneself, gaining wisdom. But this can only be realized after going through a crisis, often accompanied by painful sensations: it seems as if everything is meaningless, nothing new will happen, the husband is annoying, strange desires appear, the satisfaction of which does not provide consolation. Or desires don’t appear at all.

When Natalya described her condition, the word “dead end” was mentioned more than once. She still saw a way out - to change her life, to fill the voids that formed after the children grew up and no longer needed constant care. In addition, the woman had not worked for a long time, and she wanted to feel more independent from her husband, including financially. But she couldn’t choose an activity she liked, and one that would also bring in money—Natalia didn’t have any ideas in this regard. There was also a fear of competition with young people who had recently received an education.

Analytical psychologists work a lot with imagination, symbols, images, and myths. Therefore, I invited the client to remember her favorite childhood fairy tale. In it we could look for images that can become a source of strength and confidence. Natalya found it difficult to say whether she had such a fairy tale; she did not remember her childhood very well at all. But the book “Black Chicken, or Underground Inhabitants” appeared before my eyes. Natalya associated herself with her hero, the boy Alyosha, who descends into the dungeon. Closing her eyes at my request, she imagined herself entering this dungeon. “How will you seek contact with your future?” - I asked and received the answer: “To the touch.” It was warm, soft, fluffy - but when we began to discuss these sensations, it turned out that there were two images behind them: a rabbit, domestic, calm and patient, and a cat, which can protect itself from danger, makes its own choice and does not allow manage yourself. I suggested that Natalya think more often about this cat, which can give her strength. And also - look for contact with your unconscious, where the answer to what you should do can come from. Imagine in detail the place where Natalya will start working, the clothes she will wear there, the route from home to the office, see a new and independent self, feel freedom, lightness, confidence. Such “films” about our future can give us more than any logical understanding of the situation. At the very least, with their help we can find out what we would really like to do and what we would like to be.

What do you do when your husband pisses you off?

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A happy family in which love and harmony reigns is the dream of every woman. But families in which there are no scandals and quarrels can confidently be considered very rare phenomena. Much more often you can see a family in which there are omissions and mutual claims between the spouses. Quarrels, conflicts and grievances - all this can lead to a cooling of relationships and subsequently to divorce.

The wife began to irritate her husband: possible reasons

Not only women have complaints about their chosen ones, husbands are also not always happy with the behavior or some character traits of their beloved ones.

It is worth noting that men are very rarely ready for a frank conversation, with the help of which they could tell their spouse that she does not always behave correctly. They tend to endure until the last minute, accumulate resentment and irritation and, as a result, break down in the heat of another quarrel and dump a tub of “pleasants” on their spouse.

However, the list of “irritating” actions of the fair sex is not a great secret. So, if you want to be sure that you do not irritate the man you love, pay attention to the most common complaints that men have about their significant other.

Excessive sociability

The desire for a heart-to-heart conversation with a loved one is quite understandable and expected, because a regular conversation helps you feel needed and loved. However, psychologists say that men feel the need to communicate half as often as women.

A long working day, during which he had to communicate with colleagues, takes a lot of energy from a man, so that by the evening he is able to talk for literally ten minutes, and wants to spend the rest of the time on rest.

Obsessive cleanliness

There is a category of women who are simply obsessed with cleanliness. At first, the man perceives this feature as an advantage, because the family nest always greets him with order and comfort. But over time, the man begins to experience dull irritation.

Why? What's wrong with a woman taking care of order in the house?

Undoubtedly, this desire deserves respect, but everything should be in moderation. A man longs to go home to a loving woman who is waiting for him, wants to be close, longs to receive affection and a tender kiss. And in the end he is met by a desperate housewife with a mop at the ready, with a bucket and a rag in her hands.

Naturally, over time, this state of affairs will begin to infuriate him, because he fell in love not with a robot vacuum cleaner, but with a sweet and charming girl.

Jealousy of a child

Quite often you can find families in which, after the birth of a baby, a man begins to feel unnecessary and abandoned. This is especially true for families in which a woman could not become pregnant for a long time.

Long-awaited motherhood radically changes a woman. For her, the appearance of a baby is a trigger that completely changes her picture of the world. From now on, a woman’s first place is not her beloved man, but the little baby she has carried under her heart for many months. Her whole life revolves around him, he is her sun and all her attention will be focused only on him.

You can say that there is nothing terrible in this, because the child requires special attention and care. But try to explain this to a man who doesn’t remember the last time he had the opportunity to spend a hot night in the arms of his beloved wife. It begins to seem to him that he is of value to his wife only as a breadwinner, obliged to provide for the needs of his wife and child.

However, this belief is obviously wrong. It’s just difficult for a man to understand what it’s like to carry a new life within himself, to suffer during childbirth, to worry about his peaceful sleep, to worry when he is tormented by colic or when his first teeth are being cut. Therefore, in order not to provoke the progression of male irritation, it is worth involving him in the efforts of caring for the baby, in this way the emotional connection between father and child will only strengthen.

Bad habits

Despite the fact that during the courtship period a man could be completely calm about the fact that his chosen one smokes or drinks, over time the bad habits of the woman he loves can begin to irritate him.

Previously, he even found the picture of a woman lighting a cigarette, casting a languid glance at her companion from under her painted eyelashes, somewhat arousing. Now he begins to consider her as the mother of his children and the presence of bad habits causes rejection in him, because a woman who smokes or drinks is not able to give birth to healthy offspring.

Such an attitude is embedded somewhere on a subconscious level. So, if a woman is not ready to give up bad habits, then she should be prepared for reproaches and accusations.

Thirst for career growth

A successful and well-earning woman is only at first glance in an advantageous position. Most often it turns out that while a woman enjoys a successful career, her family suffers: her husband and children. When she is absorbed in solving work issues and spends her free time from work on self-improvement and completing overtime tasks, her children and husband are forced to be on their own.

A job and a stable income are good, but if the husband and children do not receive the amount of attention they need, they begin to feel unnecessary and superfluous. As a result, resentment and reproaches appear.

Also, do not forget about the category of men who are simply annoyed by the success of their other half. This is especially common in families where the woman earns more than the man.

For representatives of the stronger sex, it is important to feel their uniqueness and impeccability, to know that they are all hunters and the head of the family. And here his tender wife constantly looms before his eyes, whose salary literally does not allow him to sleep peacefully. So he begins to rage, look for her faults in her household duties, and find fault with the fact that she devotes too little time to him or the children.

Reluctance to work

The opposite situation is a woman’s lack of desire to work and build a career. It has long been known that the image of an avid housewife is not popular with most men. Men want to build a family with women who can become equal partners, and not be a useful appendage to the apartment.

Men are essentially far from understanding that household chores can take up a lot of time, so they are always surprised at what they can do while staying at home all day.

Of course, keeping the house in order and having a delicious dinner, in their opinion, take some time, but not the whole day. And therefore it begins to seem to them that the woman married him only in order to live for her own pleasure, literally dependent on the poor worker. So he can easily start reproaching even with a piece of bread, thus showing his dissatisfaction and irritability.

Ungroomed appearance

Many women, after getting married, stop paying due attention to their appearance. At home, they wear old, stretched T-shirts and faded trousers or creepy robes, completing the image of a Soviet housewife.

A woman often believes that having received a stamp in her passport, she has won her battle, she can no longer strain herself and live for her own pleasure, and therefore there is nothing critical about an extra cake before bed or a forgotten face mask.

As a result, the man watches as the sweet and charming beauty with whom he fell in love turns into an unkempt woman with over ten kilograms, bushy eyebrows and pimples on her nose. At such moments, he will not only begin to experience dull irritation, but he may well stop loving his wife.

Disrespect for his relatives and friends

Marriage to the man of your dreams does not guarantee an ideal relationship with his parents and friends. You can't please everyone and not everyone can please you. But if you cannot coexist peacefully with his loved ones, you are guaranteed to receive in return his discontent and scandals with reproaches for disrespect for his mother-in-law or a friend with whom they ate a ton of salt together.

What to do if your wife begins to annoy her husband

If a woman understands that something irritates her husband, then before accusing him of lack of love and callousness, she should talk frankly with him and ask him what exactly does not suit him. Do not show your dissatisfaction and do not start shouting with mutual claims.

In addition to a heart-to-heart conversation, it’s worth taking an objective look at yourself from the outside. How do you show your love to your husband? Do you greet him with a smile? Give him your affection and care? Take care of yourself and your children? Try to remember how your relationship was built at the very beginning and how you interact at the moment.

If you can’t cope on your own, then it wouldn’t hurt to seek advice from a psychologist. It will be enough to outline a model of your family to a specialist, answer his questions, and then a qualified psychologist will help you look at yourself from the outside and understand what exactly is going wrong.

Remember that the most important thing in a happy marriage is to give your love to your spouse every minute of your life. You don’t have to shout about it, just don’t deprive him of your care and attention, and then he will always answer you in kind.

Hello, dear readers! Everyone knows the feeling when someone makes you angry. Any of his movements, words or anything can cause negativity. It’s one thing if such a situation occurs when you have the opportunity to simply minimize communication, but what to do if a loved one is annoying.

It is very important to understand that your sensations hurt you first. The opponent, most likely, also notices a change in behavior and this gives him some discomfort, but what can he do? But you experience negative emotions that cause strong and long-term suffering that have a detrimental effect on your psyche, and you are capable of much.

My wife is pissed off - what to do in this situation. I will give you some useful tips, I will tell you why for some couples love changes if you are no longer happy with your pregnant wife.

Let's start?

Taking a break from each other

In the article about that, I talked about a lot of details and about the best way to get out of the situation. Just try to communicate less with the person who annoys you, or avoid him altogether if possible.

I also spoke in great detail in previous publications. There are people who subconsciously try to get you emotional. Of course, it is unlikely that the same situation will occur now when it comes to your wife, but irritation may be temporary, and therefore a little rest may be beneficial for your relationship.

As much as we would like this not to happen, people tend to get tired of each other. Some couples are comfortable with the fact that one of the spouses can go on an independent trip or go outdoors with friends for the weekend. Others do not accept such behavior in any way. They are offended by the idea that someone might get tired of them.

If necessary, try to gently explain to your wife that you would like to spend a few days without her. Explain to her that you want to talk with friends about men's topics that are not discussed in women's society. Don't say she won't be interested. Don't draw conclusions for your spouse. Tell her that not all of your friends will be able to feel free in her company and will still emphasize her presence. Be friendly.

Time spent apart allows you to relax, miss your partner a little and look at him with different eyes.

Keep respect

I worked with a married couple who had an original and very healthy arrangement. If one of the spouses began to feel irritated towards the other, he immediately informed the other half about this, saying, bear with me a little and don’t be persistent. And it’s surprising that they were sympathetic to this request and left the irritated one alone. Moreover, understanding your partner has a certain healing effect, you see it and unpleasant emotions disappear on their own.

Feelings for another person always pass through various periods and, over the years of “faithful service,” she has earned at least the respect of her husband. Try to control yourself so as not to aggravate the situation.

Childhood memory

In the article, I talked about the importance of paying attention to the moment when your irritation began to manifest itself - his words and actions.

For example, one of my clients recalled that she experienced special negative feelings at the moment when her husband began to sneeze repeatedly. A little later it turned out that the wife’s reaction was provoked by a memory from childhood. During family feasts, if the drunken father also began to sneeze, the mother would immediately rush in shouting: “Stop drinking, this is already a sign that you have drunk too much.”

Perhaps certain actions make you angry. Think about it. It becomes easier when you understand that the problem is not caused by the person himself, but by what he does. You can calmly talk and explain your behavior to a woman, or simply relieve stress by understanding yourself.

Difficult situations

There are other situations, for example, when a wife begins to nag her husband that he has not been able to get a job for a long time, but... It is undoubtedly unpleasant for a man to listen to this and, of course, at such moments the wife infuriates.

Unfortunately, most likely, you are not coping with the situation and the understanding that your wife is right fuels irritation even more. In such situations, you need to understand that the sawing partner does not have the goal of driving you to white heat, he is also worried and does not know a way out.

So maybe, instead of mutual insults and quarrels, we should sit down together and think about what the solution is and develop a strategy together? As soon as you turn to your significant other for help, your attitude will change instantly.

Also, an audiobook can help you solve the problem. Elena Novoselova “Enemies of relationships: grievances, irritation and claims. How to defeat them?. In it you will find even more tips on how to get rid of unpleasant emotions towards a loved one.

That's all for me. Don't forget to subscribe to the newsletter. Until next time.

Happy families are the same, as the classic said. What they have in common is that they are rare. There are many more families in which every now and then some problems arise, disagreements occur, misunderstandings occur and relationships deteriorate.

Why is my wife annoying?

Men have a lot of claims against women, often contradictory and ambiguous. But a particular man usually has one main complaint about a particular woman and a couple of minor ones. It is quite easy for a woman to identify them and take measures to eliminate them or at least correct them, if, of course, she wants to save the marriage.

Men most often complain about the following things:

• She pesters me with conversations all the time. Psychologists say that the need for speaking in men is almost two times less than in women. If a man actively communicates at work, then by the evening he has little dialogue potential left. A woman, even if she talked all day at work, still has a fairly high need for communication. Housewives and young mothers have an even greater need for parental leave. Their entire social circle is a small child who cannot speak normally or the walls of the house, so they wait for their husband to come home from work in order to satisfy their desire to communicate.
• She is obsessed with cleanliness. The fact that, having gotten up to drink water at night, the husband discovers that the bed has already been made, is funny only in an anecdote. In life, with such behavior, a man is very annoyed by his wife. A man wants live, full-fledged communication with an attractive wife who is interested in him, but instead he sees her constantly with a brush, rag, sponge, washing, rubbing, cleaning. Everything in the house sparkles, so a lot of restrictions are imposed on the family: don’t trample, don’t litter, don’t touch the furniture with your hands, don’t eat in the room, don’t splash in the bathroom. With all the desire for cleanliness, there is no need to turn your home into a sterile operating room.
• With the birth of her child, she stopped paying attention to her husband. Motherhood changes a woman. She is busy with the baby, she is less interested in other people, and even she is already less interesting to herself than the baby. This is normal, as it is provided by nature to preserve the population of any animal species. But we must not forget about our husband. He did not carry or give birth to a child, he did not have hormonal changes, so it is more difficult for him to get used to the appearance of a new family member, who is unceremonious and considers the interests of others. The husband should be involved in caring for the newborn, and not oppose his motherhood to him.
• She often talks on the phone for a long time. Speaking is a necessity for women. The telephone is a great way to satisfy the hunger for communication. But the time of conversations needs to be planned so that the husband does not become a witness to them and does not get irritated about it.
• She's unclean. Men are tolerant of clutter, but stains on the sink and toilet, deposits on the bathtub counters, a mountain of unwashed dishes and stale bed linen gradually begin to irritate them. A woman’s personal uncleanliness has an even more negative impact. Icicle hair, the smell of sweat, bitten nails and plaque on the teeth repel the most undemanding men.
• The house is constantly crowded with her girlfriends. The problem is similar to constant communication on the phone. Girlfriends should come in the absence of their husband and say goodbye to his arrival. The husband wants to relax, and not squeeze hospitality out of himself, and besides, the flashing of pretty faces in front of his gaze is completely useless.
• She smokes (drinks). Bad habits of women irritate men very much, although not obviously. But over time, discontent only accumulates and pours out a stormy stream of reproaches. In addition, a woman’s health deteriorates significantly due to smoking or regular excess of alcohol.
• She dresses and wears excessive makeup. With this behavior, a man is annoyed by his wife because of possible jealousy, because of the increased attention of men to her, and also because an adult married woman in provocative clothes and with too bright makeup looks vulgar and is associated not with the wife and mother of the family, but with "night butterfly"
• She flirts with other men. There are women for whom male attention is needed like air. Not receiving attention and compliments from her husband, a woman seeks them from other men. This does not mean that we are talking about betrayal, but light, harmless flirting allows a woman to maintain her self-esteem. A woman should explain to her husband that being the center of male attention is her need, and ask her husband to evaluate her appearance and talents more often. Flirting should be as light as possible and not make the husband feel jealous or make him doubt his wife.
• She pays too much attention to her grown child. paying attention to a baby is a completely normal and natural thing. But some women take care of their children until retirement. And until the children retire. It is important to understand that a grown child should be released into a free life, but he should be prepared for this from the first grades of school. The child bears ever-increasing responsibility, then he comes to the graduation party as a formed person with his own principles and life goals. First of all, the children themselves need this. And the freed up time should be devoted to yourself and your husband, if you don’t want to meet old age alone or in the company of an unemployed, unlucky child of pre-retirement age.
• She is not at all interested in children. In some women, the maternal instinct is poorly developed or is activated only during the child’s infancy. This is both good and bad. It’s good because the child learns early to be independent and self-sufficient, but it’s bad because the child often lacks attention, love and support, and also causes misunderstanding from the family, especially the husband. If a woman practices a sober approach to parenting, she should express her position to her spouse. But if she is not at all interested in her own children, then she needs the help of a psychologist.
• She works a lot. A well-earning wife is only at first glance in an advantageous position. But in reality, she spends almost all her time on her career, leaving little for her family, husband, and children. Women often have to make an unspoken choice between family and work. Work, of course, brings money and allows you to maintain a high standard of living, but the husband and children rarely forgive their wife and mother for their lack of attention for many years and feel unnecessary and unhappy.
• She doesn't want to work. The image of a housewife has not been in fashion for a long time. A man simply doesn’t understand what he can do at home all day and what he can get tired of, even if he comes to a sparkling clean apartment, lies down on freshly ironed sheets and eats a five-course dinner. In order not to live in the annoying image of a housewife and a slacker, it is worth getting a job, at least part-time or working remotely from home. A woman who earns “pins” is socially more attractive in the eyes of a man than an absolute dependent.
  
  
• She nags all the time. Many women, instead of making a direct specific request, begin to nag men with reproaches and examples of the well-done husbands of their friends and neighbors. This behavior causes nothing but severe irritation. Moreover, the desire to fulfill a woman’s request. It will be much more effective to express your desire kindly and gently, and then unobtrusively remind about it if your husband has forgotten.
• She doesn't know how to cook. Despite the huge selection of semi-finished products in stores and ample opportunities to order food at home - from fast food to classy restaurant dishes - men want to eat delicious home-cooked food and show off to their friends. Therefore, every woman needs to be able to cook borscht, Olivier, pies and jellied meat.
• She is constantly on a diet. A woman who is constantly losing weight and notifying everyone around her about it looks pathetic and stupid. Even if the diet is indicated for her for health reasons, there is no need to talk about it. At the table you should simply choose the permitted dishes and politely reject the prohibited ones. At home, the husband and children want to receive normal, nourishing food, and not a salad of celery and ginger. Diet is a personal matter, so you shouldn’t force it on your family.
• She doesn't take care of herself. A man wants to see his woman well-groomed and sexy, but an aunt with a pimply face, peeling nail polish with overgrown cuticles, long-grown highlights, with a dozen extra kilos on her sides and in a robe that looks like it was taken away from a homeless person in a fight, cannot be like that Maybe. You don't have to be a millionaire to look attractive. Acne can be treated by improving digestion and masks made from medicinal herbs, nails can be carefully filed by yourself, hair should be cut regularly or grown to a length that does not require correction, and excess weight can be lost with simple exercises at home and a balanced diet.
• She doesn't get along with her husband's relatives and/or friends. No one is obliged to love his mother-in-law and his husband's school friends, but it is unacceptable for a well-mannered woman to ignore them or behave offensively or provocatively towards them.
• Her relatives and/or friends consider themselves entitled to interfere in the relationship and “educate” her husband. A woman who respects herself and her family will not allow anyone to interfere in her life. Therefore, parents, relatives and friends should be regularly warned not to try to control the life of another family.

How to relieve your husband's irritation?

It is necessary to find out what exactly makes him furious, discuss the situation with him and find a way out of it. Only through dialogue can rapid positive results be achieved.

What a wife should not do:

• Arrange a showdown on the topic “and you infuriate me even more”;
• Ignore signals coming from your husband;
• Taking out dissatisfaction on children;
• Complain about your husband’s claims to your parents and friends.

If you can’t fix the problem yourself, you need to:

• Contact a psychologist or family counselor. A professional will help you build the right strategy for family behavior.
• Contact a neurologist. Perhaps it is a problem with the health of the nervous system, in which case drug treatment is required.
• Contact a religious minister. Many couples find faith helpful in times of marital crisis.

What should I do if my wife is a fool?

Difficulties in relationships

What should I do if my wife is a fool?

“What if my wife is a fool?” - this question is the most common and rhetorical among men who encounter the “brilliant” and unpredictable female logic. Indeed, any misunderstanding, disagreement, stupid decision or strange behavior of the wife can be characterized as “she’s a fool.” And it will be true.

Most men are also amazed that when they married their wives, they were not like this. But over time and age, they changed, and their antics and behavior began to irritate and infuriate. “How did such a smart and charming girl turn into such a fool?” - this is what any man begins to think after several years of marriage.

What turns a girl into a fool

Laziness and boredom. While a girl lives with her parents or communicates with friends at the institute, she shows some kind of social activity, she has a duty to her parents. She tries to appear correct and follows rules and regulations that, in the end, she doesn’t really need. But after you marry her and she leaves parental care, her rules begin.

Her communication comes down to conversations with the same “mundane” women, she practically doesn’t want to understand anything, and she feels, on the one hand, good, but, on the other hand, bored. And here she tries to make up for the lack of “spiritualized” communication with her husband. She doesn’t care that he came home from work, that he has other things to do. She begins to tell him some nonsense, which in her opinion is of extreme importance.

Circle of friends. If your wife has been communicating only with naive and stupid women for 10 years, then it is difficult to expect different behavior from her. Stupidity has a habit of spreading, and women readily accept it. However, this also has its advantages. It is much easier to convince your wife of the need for something when she believes in any fables and mysterious stories. This is a reason, but a completely positive one.

She's too smart. A woman should be beautiful, loving, affectionate and cunning. And when we talk about cunning, we do not mean intelligence. Too high an intelligence makes a girl behave defiantly, rudely, straightforwardly and completely stupidly towards a man. If a guy wants to spend his time in the company of smart guys, he will meet his friends. He needs understanding and affection from a woman. And not accusations that he does not understand anything, and in general he is a naive fool. Perhaps such women achieve something, but it is impossible to live with them.

She's just stupid. Some girls don't become fools, they are born fools. No matter what you do, no matter what you want to get from her, she will still act stubborn, stupid and confused. There is a lot more that can be said about such women, but let’s put it this way: “What kind of fool can we take?”

The biggest problem of girls is stupid

A woman can be a fool to her husband at home - this is a common situation that any man faces. It is much worse when a fool shows her disagreement and argues with her husband in public. This damages men's reputation, hurts men's pride, and most importantly, self-esteem. No man almost ever forgives his wife for such behavior.

Therefore, if your wife behaves like this, then this is a reason to leave her at home and have fun with friends. No matter how stupid a woman is, she is obliged to support her husband’s opinion in public.

What to do with a fool

Talk to your wife about the current situation when you are both calm and in a good mood. Start with something like this correct phrase: “I would like to discuss with you an issue that upsets me.” There is no need to say phrases like: “Wife, why are you such a fool?” Explain that you are a little tired of her antics, and you want a little peace and understanding. Tell her that you will recognize and reward her if she changes her behavior.

If your wife accepts your words, then everything is fine. If not, then most likely you will have to spend more time with friends, taking a break from this behavior of your wife. Let her understand that you will not tolerate her behavior.

This can cause big problems in a marriage, but if you are willing to put in the effort and time, it will give results and make your life more predictable. The main thing is to understand that female behavior has the ability to be influenced. So it is possible that among her friends or relatives there are those who instill such behavior in her. Become a respected man and she will do whatever you want.

And to be honest, it is difficult to explain why women begin to behave this way, why they begin to limit a man and make him feel stupid. One good thing is that even though women are fools, men still love them.