Features of the mentality and worldview of the ancient East. Which definition of “fate” is closest to you? What do you strive for more?

An experienced and confident sales manager enters the office of a decision maker (DM) of “Eastern” nationality and after a while leaves with a feeling of bewilderment. Something clearly went wrong. There was a need for the product, the quality and prices were normal, they spoke only to the point, but the conversation did not go well from the very beginning. This could have been forgotten if history had not repeated itself again with another “eastern” client...

The mistake was very gross and could not be detected logically, because it was made at the level of the cultural code. The client should not have smiled. Even after living in Moscow for decades, the client still continued to subconsciously perceive the businessman who came to the negotiations with a smile on his face as a rogue who wanted to deceive him.

Ignorance of the cultural code in situations where people are financially motivated to make contact sometimes gives rise to ridiculous situations. The first thing people do is try to adapt. Saying “Salaam!” at a meeting or "Nihao!" they hope to show respect and earn the sympathy of their interlocutor. Passing by again - only people you know well say hello like that. How would you personally respond to “Great!” or “Hey bro!” at the beginning of a business meeting with someone you are seeing for the first time? Here it's not so much a matter of insolence as of cognitive dissonance, arising from the fact that these words are spoken politely and officially. People can make allowances for many things, but not those that irritate them beyond reason.

In principle, the path of opportunism is a dead end, since it does not tolerate half measures. If such thoughts come to your mind, then take them to the point of absurdity. For example, imagine that you came to a meeting with a client wearing a burqa specially worn for such an occasion. It will be enough to find and read good book in foreign business etiquette written not by a theorist, but by a successful practitioner who has something to say. Such a practical guide will not make you an expert, but it will protect you from serious mistakes - which is quite enough.

Another feature of the eastern way of life that causes a lot of trouble is ignorance of the true decision-maker. In short, the senior person is not necessarily the decision maker. This should not be understood in the sense that there are “ gray cardinals“—persons influencing decision making (PDA) of management—in Western terminology, but literally. Do serious proposals Without understanding the true decision maker, it is fraught, at a minimum, with a waste of time.

There are features in which the Eastern mentality is very similar to the domestic one, only they are manifested to a greater extent. For example, both domestic and eastern businessmen are not internally close to the win-win concept. The winner (ideally) either gets everything or, at a minimum, achieves significant concessions during negotiations. When preparing for negotiations, this will need to be taken into account in advance. Prepare for a “fight,” but don’t take what’s happening too seriously.

From our point of view, the reaction of the eastern partners to situations associated with “loss of face” also seems inadequate. The fact is that during negotiations, Asian partners often exaggerate their real opportunities, but in their environment this is not a manifestation of dishonesty. In situations when it comes to signing a contract, and the partner is not ready to seal in writing his recent verbal obligations on the initially proposed terms, you should under no circumstances draw the attention of other compatriots of your counterparty to this - otherwise you will make yourself a mortal enemy. In such a situation, you need to either calmly leave the negotiations or continue them until a solution acceptable to you is reached.

As mentioned above, there is a lot of sensible literature on cross-cultural management, using which you can not only avoid mistakes associated with ignorance of the Eastern mentality, but also become culturally richer, because many things can only be understood in comparison.

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To be honest, the news I read today about the kidnapping of more tourists in Sinai has me tense. You will say: “since when is Sasha bothered by such news? Tourists have been kidnapped before, but you continued to go to Dahab and didn’t worry.” Of course, the mess didn’t start yesterday, and you and I have known for a long time that most of The Sinai Peninsula is not controlled by the authorities, and its north is completely in the hands of jihadists. Moreover, exactly a year ago I published a post “”, where I discussed in detail the topic of kidnapping, drug trafficking and even numerous murders of African illegal immigrants in the vast expanses of the Egyptian Sinai. What has changed now? Two things that will seem insignificant to a person far from the Middle East -

Firstly, the careless Egyptian police, under the influence of the general chaos in the country, lost fear and began to attract tourists, which had never happened before. Secondly, never before have terrorists gotten so close to a tourist area. Please note that the bandits stopped a taxi with tourists on the main road leading from Taba on the border with Israel to the youth resort of Dahab. This road has always been considered the safest in all of Egypt; I myself have traveled along it dozens of times. Thirdly, everything around is even visually deteriorating, from the roads, which no one has repaired for two years now (since the overthrow of Mubarak), to the infrastructure of the Egyptian security services. The following shots are unlikely to make you feel protected, nor will the pissing law enforcement officers. Thanks for the photos curiousalex , who staged a photo hunt for Egyptian border guards patrolling the border between Egypt and Israel, see his post " Along the border with a camera" -

But actually I wanted to talk about something else -

Features of Eastern mentality

More than 10 years ago, as a simple soldier in the Israeli army, I was sometimes surprised at how harshly the military sometimes treated the Palestinians. The fact is that quite often I was sent as a driver of a patrol jeep to the Palestinian territories in support of the border police or paratroopers. I remember many harsh rules regarding the local population, which were due to security reasons, but often seemed to me an excess. For example, as punishment for throwing stones at Israeli cars, we could close the exit from some Arab village and prevent them from going to work, to the hospital, or to study all day. But then the alarmed village elders appeared and tearfully promised the military to curb the hooligans, after which it was quiet for a month or two, and no stones were thrown. And here’s another thing: there was a rule that no one could overtake a patrol jeep driving slowly along the road, so a convoy of Arab cars lined up behind us. It would seem that we are driving 30 km/h and are in no hurry, why make it so that fifty cars trail behind us? Let them overtake! That's what I thought. And the officer explained to me that it is very easy to shoot us point-blank from an overtaking car, but when they are trailing behind, it is much more difficult. Let’s say, I agreed, but such incidents happen extremely rarely, we are essentially punishing thousands ordinary people, who have not done anything wrong to us. The officer had an answer to this too -

...We taught the Arabs to live in a certain coordinate system, clearly drawing the lines of what is permitted. Sometimes the innocent suffer, yes. But a feature of the Arab mentality is respect for the strong and contempt for the weak. They perceive any indulgence as weakness and immediately conquer living space; for them there are no concepts of ethics and the value of human life. If we weaken, they will tear us to pieces...

The idea is that, in the officer’s opinion, it is impossible to negotiate with this audience in a human way. You cannot meet them, shake hands and agree: up to this tree is your land, and then it’s mine. No! It’s possible with a European, but not with an Arab. Because as soon as you give him your hand and take a step back (as agreed), he will decide, “Loshara, are you a weakling for agreeing to make concessions? Well, well, right now I’ll throw you out of here completely.”

Returning to Egypt

To be honest, I did not agree with the officer. Seriously, is it really possible to keep an entire nation in line because of a certain number of bastards and terrorists? This is illogical and unfair. But life showed that the officer was certainly right in part of his arguments. In the East the weak are not tolerated; they are trampled and their living space is conquered. Egyptian President Mubarak kept a tight rein on a huge state of 80 million people, the bulk of the population of which are illiterate peasants, embittered at their miserable and hopeless fate. Mubarak dressed some of the peasants in military uniform and gave some money, following the principle “the best overseer is ex-slave". And these cattle, dressed in uniform, began to spread rot on their own fellow citizens. But this Arabic East, where there is such a system everywhere, there is no other way - they will trample.

What happened? There is no longer the stern Pharaoh Mubarak, who could praise or chop off his head. And the illiterate people were at a loss at the first moment, how could this be? Will no one hit us over the head anymore if we ask for an extra loaf of bread? For about a year, people watched closely, expecting a catch; What if Pharaoh returns and punishes for disobedience? But the pharaoh never returned. And the people realized that it had arrived finest hour. Now you can do whatever comes into the brainless head of a sexually preoccupied, illiterate fellah. You can rob your neighbor, you can burn down Christian churches, you can rape women, you can kidnap tourists. Finally, happiness has knocked on the door of ordinary Egyptians, do whatever you want, and nothing will happen to you for it!

As you can see, the situation is developing exactly as that Israeli officer said. As soon as the system of total control and the inevitability of punishment collapsed, the crowd immediately lost fear and went on the offensive. Today, having kidnapped tourists directly from the tourist area, the cattle have won more living space for themselves. They will only advance, carefully taking the next step (testing the government for lice); if they don’t get hit on the head, they will capture more and more. This is what Eastern mentality is.

Clean up Egypt in 24 hours

If Mubarak had been released from a Cairo prison and asked to restore order in the country within 24 hours, he would have started with napalm. Bedouins kidnapped a tourist? What tribe? Such and such? Raze all their villages to the ground, shoot and burn them all. Are there still problems, say there are queues at gas stations and fuel is being stolen? No problem: cut off the head of Morsi and all Islamists, hang the governor of Sinai, shoot the head of the police, rip out the index finger from each of the drivers of all oil tankers who dump gasoline “bypass the cash register.” Then Mubarak would have lunch (a hard day) and by the evening he would restore order in the country. What, did someone remember about democracy? Checkers for you, or let's go?

Values ​​of democracy in the Arab East

Two things: democracy is the right of the majority to destroy the minority, and democracy is the right to make a choice. The first and last choice in their life. They removed Pharaoh Mubarak - a much dumber and more evil Islamist Pharaoh Morsi came in. There will be chaos and bloodshed. By the way, exactly the same thing is happening these days in Syria.

We answer 10 simple questions, calculate the final score, and see the results!

1. What, in your opinion, determines our future to a greater extent?

a) God, providence - O

b) Our actions - 1

2. How do you prefer to represent your importance in the Universe?

a) I am just one representative of a huge number of people -1

b) I am a small part of the universe - Oh

3. When you have troubles, how do you cope with them?

a) I get very upset and show strong emotions – 1

b) I try not to give away my reaction in any way, I worry in silence, I go deeper into myself - O

4. In what case, in your opinion, will a person work better?

a) If he was well trained -1

b) If anything inspires him to do this work - O

5. What do you strive for more?

a) Understand this world - O

b) Achieve success in this world -1

6. How do you feel about sudden, radical changes?

a) They are necessary – 1

b) They are dangerous - Oh

7. Does it make sense to try to see as many cities and different countries as possible?

a) You must try to know yourself first of all and find happiness in the place that fate has assigned you - O

b) Of course, by learning about the lives of others, we get to know ourselves better -1

8. Which definition of “fate” is closest to you?

a) Everything that happens to us is fate - O

b) We make our destiny with our own hands -1

9. How do you feel about traditions?

a) Respectfully, people have been hoarding them for years and years, our task is to support them - O

b) Traditions are invented by people and abolished by them - 1

10. What do you strive for more?

a) To learn as much as possible -1

b) Fortunately - O

Spoiler

3 points or less. Eastern mentality.

The most important thing for you is to think about yourself, about your own place in this world. Understanding who you are and why you were given life is a question to which you are ready to devote years. At the same time, you do not take current events in real life so seriously and view them as if from afar. Some Eastern religions consider the issue of reincarnation (transmigration of souls), and this, of course, left an imprint on the mentality of the people of the East. For them, the current life is not the only one, so there is still a lot of time to think about and correct mistakes. You are characterized by moral stability, stability of views, and recognition of authorities. You respect any antiquity, honor traditions sanctified by centuries. You are convinced that spiritual life is more important than material life. The pursuit of worldly success is not for you. Yours best time will come in old age.

4-6 points. Russian mentality.

The name of this category is arbitrary, since Russians, of course, are representatives of the Western world. However, for the sake of the theory of “Eurasian civilization,” this option should also be considered. Russians seem to be carriers of the moral values ​​of both the East and the West. Respect for the elderly, hospitality, the desire for spirituality - this is from the East. From the West we got openness, a thirst for knowledge, a desire for comfort and much more. The result was a people, intelligence and Vital energy which are so strong that they help us out in the most difficult situation. If you fall into this category, then you probably have an extraordinary mind (this does not depend on education), have creative talents and, most likely, are capable of heroic things.” A person with your mentality often values ​​other people's lives more than their own. And you yourself live as if you feel some kind of mission. If you have already realized it, if you, say, understand that your mission is to create a family, raise children, help the unfortunate, make as many friends as possible, and so on, then your most productive time is maturity. And if you have not yet understood why you live, then the time has not come. But it can come at any time.

7 points or more. Western mentality.

You consider yourself first and foremost an individual. Your goal in life is to achieve as much success as possible. You know that life is given to a person only once, so every day lived is valuable. You view life as service: a person must serve God, himself, his family, his friends and even the whole world. You believe that one person can change the world, and you don't rule out that you could be that person. You consider education and professionalism to be the most important personality asset. A main task anyone living on earth - to do business, that is, study or work. Changing the surrounding reality for the better is not only useful, but also pleasant. You live in the real world and value first of all what brings benefit and success. Your best time is youth..

Sergey Liberte

East is a delicate matter

When 35 years ago in the film " White sun Desert" was the first time the phrase "The East is a delicate matter" was uttered, we immediately took it on faith. And the image of this very East, and this meant (and in the film) the Middle East, the Muslim East, was formed in our generation completely and irrevocably.
But what does this mean, how should it be understood, what is the subtlety here, none of us knew. It seemed that “subtle” meant that one had to act there carefully, without swinging, listening and looking closely. “Subtle” - therefore, you need to look at the nuances and intonations. “Subtle” is something poorly understood that needs to be examined closely, under a microscope, sweeping away the illusions of the first impression.

Having received this lesson, it turned out to be much easier for me to understand the political processes of the Middle East. Somebody comes to us political figure, leader or minister of a European power. These respected people are accustomed to the fact that even within the framework of diplomatic protocol, interlocutors do not lie if they touch upon a topic, but only slightly veil their thoughts, following etiquette. Having visited Ramallah (the current capital of the Palestinian Authority) and returning to Jerusalem, they enthusiastically inform the Israeli leadership that we have a reliable partner for negotiations, that he is full of desire for peace and would only like evidence of the reciprocal desire of the Israeli side.
I don’t know exactly how our politicians are reacting, but I can assume that it is according to protocol. With the possible exception of Avigdor Lieberman, who, when he was Minister of Foreign Affairs, was and looked like the black sheep of the diplomatic world.
And I remember Muhammad, and now I’m no longer surprised by anything.

*****

Other lessons went much easier and faster. Israel's negotiations with Palestinian Authority leaders for a permanent settlement are extremely difficult. They contain several independent areas, such as borders, Israeli security problems, the presence of Palestinian refugees, the presence of Israeli populations in controlled areas, the status of saints for each religion (or for both) places. A separate issue is the status of Jerusalem, annexed by Israel in 1967, and within Jerusalem the status of the old city, filled with holy places for Jews, Muslims and Christians and, in addition, representing a pearl of tourism.
It would seem natural, from the point of view of a person brought up in the Western mentality, that in such a tangle of relationships, a compromise is inevitable. Neither side can get everything they think is right. You give in on one thing, they give in to you on another, the result is a compromise that does not satisfy either side, but is decisive main problem, for the sake of which all the fuss, so to speak.
But this is in the West, and the East is a delicate matter. The concept of compromise is absent in eastern mentality. Always and by any means you should achieve the fulfillment of all your requirements.

The Israelis are ready to compromise. There are practically no people left who think that as a result of negotiations they can get everything they would like. And this readiness is regarded as weakness, you just need to be stubborn, persistent and you can get everything. The vast majority of the population and the leaders of the autonomy think so.
If we want to count how many compromise proposals of the League of Nations, Britain (owners of the mandate to govern Palestine), the UN and other organizations, committees and countries were rejected by Arab representatives, then Wikipedia at this address has full information about it.
Therefore, by the way, conflicts between Arab families and clans, both in Israel and in controlled territories, never end, as well as between Arab countries. Their demands are usually contradictory and it is impossible to reconcile them.
In the east there are a couple of interesting concepts: one of them is “hudna”, which is translated into other languages ​​as “truce” (used in relations between countries or organizations). But this is not entirely true, this is a truce, which is temporary and is not necessary for the parties by definition. It can be violated by any party without announcement or explanation. Its other interpretation is not of an oriental nature. Follow the story, for example Iran-Iraq conflict. How many treaties, how many, at first glance, compromise agreements were concluded, and they were always denounced at the first sign of the enemy’s weakness.
Another concept is “sulha” - reconciliation (used in relations between people). But this is not entirely true: in the West, when people make peace, the subject of their dispute is exhausted in the process of reconciliation. But the east is a delicate matter, sulha does not imply a solution to the problem of the dispute, but only the cessation of an open conflict, regarding which the parties agreed that it is harmful for both.
There is no such thing as a compromise.

*******

Israel is a strong power militarily. Her army is well trained and armed. It receives the most modern weapons from the United States and adds to it many technological innovations that have no analogues in the world. The rules of reserve service make it possible, given a small population in emergency situations, to increase the armed forces many times over in a matter of hours at the expense of a trained contingent. Not a single country in our region or terrorist organization (Hamas or Hezbollah) is capable of resisting such an army.
Suppress rocket launchers terrorist organizations, razing weapons warehouses to the ground, destroying not only the infrastructure of terror, but also the terrorists themselves, does not pose a problem. True, a certain number (most likely not a small number) of citizens who are not terrorists, those who are called “civilians,” will die. Chaos will reign in the ruins of the attacked territories, which will bring many troubles to those who survive.
Has this ever bothered any country or faction in the East? The answer is clear: no, never. What does it mean to act from a position of strength in the East? If there is one, then there is no need for other means of persuasion. There is no trick against scrap, as the famous Russian proverb says.

A in addition to this: no, and there cannot be such a thing as restrictions in war.
No restrictions prevented Iraq and Iran from killing about a million people in the wars between them, while using all means of destruction available to them, including chemical weapon. This did not interfere in Jordan during the suppression of the PLO uprising in 1970. No restrictions interfere today with either side in Syria, where more than a hundred thousand people have already died. There is nothing stopping Hamas from deliberately targeting residential buildings in southern Israeli cities.

At some point, the belief that “Israel is a colossus with feet of clay” or “Paper Tiger,” or something like that, was actively spreading among the Arab community. But in fact, he, Israel, is terrified of an intifada (popular uprising), stone throwing, suicide bombers, rocket attacks in the south of the country and, in general, any violation of its normal life. In Lebanon, Hezbollah also accepted the thesis that the threat of rocket fire would stop Israel. That is, in the east there was an opinion, that in reality there is no power that Israel is an amorphous state of the European type, incapable of military action associated with the disruption of normal life and large casualties of the civilian population.
After a series of operations in Gaza and the second Lebanon war, opinion changed. Today it is believed on the Palestinian street that the main reason why Israel does not use what it has military force totally (as it is done in the east) this presence of a third force, which he, Israel, is afraid of. And such a restraining force is European countries and the United States, whose opinion should be appealed to by supplying them required material. This attack was called in the press "delegitimation of Israel." People in the east cannot imagine that there are moral obligations to the population not directly involved in the conflict, and that they are the main restraining force. There are no moral obligations in front of civilians in the process of war, they do not understand why the Israeli army sends SMS to the residents of Gaza before an attack.
Here is another, very recent example: mass rape in Syria, both by government soldiers and rebels. And even such cases have been recorded in Syrian refugee camps in Turkish and Jordanian territories. After all, the countries that shelter refugees are also eastern, and the east has its own rules of the game. For example, this.

******

Hierarchical structures are a necessary element modern society. We also have them, in the countries of the so-called first world, in the West. But their use is limited by the place of work, and to some extent by politics. Otherwise, a person of the Western lifestyle is free and participates in many relationships built on the principle of equality. There has been no hierarchy in the family for a long time, even the concept of “head of the family” disappears from the lexicon, there is no hierarchy in many structures of educational systems, public groups, and non-profit organizations. Finally, in principle there is no hierarchy on the Internet, a product of the creativity of Western civilization. Both my site and the site of Yair Lapid, the Israeli Minister of Finance, are equal. They certainly differ in popularity, but this is not a hierarchy.
But the east is a delicate matter, and one cannot make a mistake here. In the east, hierarchy is built naturally in any society and any organization. And, of course, in the family: there is a father - the immutable head of the family, there is a mother who gradually gives up her second position to adult sons, there are daughters who at no age rise above their brothers in the hierarchy. Quite a few brothers went to Israeli prisons for “punishing” their sisters who committed an insult to the family by independently choosing their partners. There is a clan hierarchy, there is a hierarchy in every Arab village, everywhere.

It is especially interesting to observe this in interstate relations. The UN, which includes all states of the planet, has a weak hierarchy: the permanent members of the Security Council are upper caste, all others are formally equal. In the east this is unacceptable, and a hierarchy in interstate relations has to be established, so to speak, de facto. That is why mutual visits are so rare statesmen in the east, in the absence of a formal hierarchy, it can be extremely difficult to decide who will go to whom first. Meetings usually take place on forums where this issue does not arise. And the table is round.
Israel, not only in this situation, but in all others, looks like inadequate Middle Eastern essence. Our leaders, ministers and politicians travel to any Middle Eastern country if required in the interests of the state, without requiring reciprocity. This fact still causes a disdainful reaction from the receiving party, hidden according to protocol, but manifested in the press.

*****

This rule is complemented by another. About respect. Respect should not only be given in accordance with your place in the hierarchy, it is always an indicator of your true position in the eyes of your opponent. Floweriness and exaggeration in speeches, if you listen closely, have their own gradations.

And the shoe Bush received was an indication of the highest degree of national neglect, a shoe is not a stone, shoes in the east have their own distinct function associated with neglect.
Our Deputy Foreign Minister Dani Ayalon played this Middle Eastern farce a couple of years ago, seating the Turkish Ambassador on a sofa lower than the chair in which he himself was sitting. At that time, a terrible anti-Semitic campaign was launched in Turkey; state television channels showed a Turkish series based on lies and slander against Israelis and soldiers of the Israeli Defense Forces. Something like a "blood libel". The reason for calling the ambassador was Israeli protest against these demonstrations. Deputy The minister knew well what he was doing when he allowed photography and publication.
This photo could be the beginning of the end of diplomatic relations with any Middle Eastern country. But Israel, this inadequate entity of the Middle East, does not take into account the local rules of the game, but is guided solely by its own interests. The Foreign Minister apologized, because the severance of diplomatic relations with Turkey is not beneficial to Israel. But this, by Eastern standards, was not enough, and the Turkish “Marmara” was their response to this humiliation.
Turkey is a NATO member and a country, although unsuccessfully, awaiting admission to the European Community. According to the Turkish classification, Israel is a lower rank in the hierarchy, so to speak, the junior partner in the relationship. Therefore l any of his actions, including criticism of an anti-Semitic television series at the government level there are already manifestations of disrespect. And the low sofa is like a boot in the face!

Your position, its strength and importance, should be emphasized at every opportunity. The weakness of the enemy's position, first of all relative to my own, should also be emphasized at every opportunity. Recently, Israel also apologized for the deaths on the Marmara, considering it an operational error in the arrest. The real situation, in fairness, certainly did not require this. The Turkish Prime Minister and his Foreign Minister celebrate big victory: They asserted their place in the hierarchy by forcing the junior partner to behave according to rank. We have heard many Middle Eastern texts on this subject, praising the strength and importance of Turkey, the character and wisdom of its leaders, and the weakness of Israel, of course.
Not everyone agrees with this action. The main argument: it does more harm (for the morale of soldiers) than good (for the actions of politicians). There were even polls showing that more than half the population was against it. But our country is truly an inadequate entity in the Middle East; it does what it considers necessary and beneficial for itself, and not what the rules of conduct in our region dictate to us.

*****

Any lie and any distortion of information in our east is, in principle, acceptable. There is no direct connection between the event and its description. Essentially, any point of view is just a point of view, as valid as any other.

We hear and see on television on Arab channels such nonsense, in comparison with which the statement of the Stalinist court in the thirties of the last century that the defendants were digging a tunnel from Moscow to London looks like an innocent joke. The purpose of these statements is the desire to arouse the European consciousness to condemn our country. Such condemnation is the very force (according to the Arabs) that prevents Israel from using adequate force, and therefore significantly weakens it. And even when some independent body, such as a French court, decides that this information is not based on facts and is slander, this does not change the attitude towards her on the Arab street. The court's opinion is just another opinion. Only Allah knows the truth.
There are so many examples that it’s a pity to load the article with them. The Internet, television channels, and Arabic newspapers (not only Arabic ones, but those that receive information from their Arabic correspondents) are full of them. I'll give you the funniest one. At one time, Arab sources told us that “Israeli soldiers rape Arab women.” Then this information (apparently, which did not arouse the enthusiasm of Europeans) was replaced with another: “Israeli soldiers do not rape Arab women because they are disdainful.” So to speak - apartheid, racism and sheer political correctness. But Syrian soldiers rape because they are not racists.
Yes, truly the East is a delicate matter.

A friend sent me this letter by mail, read it, it’s very interesting.

Something to think about...

A quick overview of the sociocultural differences between European and Eastern mentality.

.... people simply do not understand the reasons why “refugees” act the way they do, because they approach the understanding of their actions with their own “European” standards, which are at least naive, and in fact short-sighted.
Some things simply cannot occur to a European, even if they are turned upside down and shaken.
Due to the relevance, I decided to share my life experience on the topic of Arab mentality, in no way pretending to be complete and exclusive, and I will be glad if there are people who also have practical experience immersion and understanding.

Let me start by saying that I love the Arab East. Yes, yes, I love him. Arabic unrealistically cool, I can’t wait to retire when I finally have time to finish my education.
I wore women's closed Muslim clothing (out of curiosity), I liked it. These clothes make you change your step and make your gait simply extremely feminine. Wedding dresses I really like them, but for everyday life.
Yes I...eh)
The East generally cannot have a more loyal supporter than me.
That is why everything I say - I say without anger, from the standpoint of a keen understanding that the West is West, East is East.
I know that the power of the East is immeasurable compared to us and they will sweep us away like microbes from the face of civilization.
The fact that I really love the Arab world is absolutely no reason to destroy Europe as a branch human development, in much the same way as you prevent your flowerbed from being destroyed simply because the vitality of the weeds is several orders of magnitude higher.
You can be called a racist against weeds all you want, but for some reason you continue to weed your flowerbed...

Now for the practical training..
1. Warm up.
Just to start with something simple, let's start with the bazaar, the easiest place to start feeling the difference.
...I asked my friends how many times should I lower the price at the market in order not to be a tourist sucker.
I'm not greedy. I’m just not a tourist here, and don’t treat me like a tourist.
Not right away, but they admitted that we need to lower the price by 15-20 times, but without a local assistant I would never be able to do this.
I became sad. A bit much. Especially without fluent Arabic.
I decided to be realistic and aim for 10 times.
Regarding Europe, you yourself know that if you managed to reduce the price by 2 times, then the purchase was a success, if by three times, your level is “God”.
None of the Europeans will simply raise the price of their goods for a foreigner 20 times simply because you assume that he should have this money.
.. every day, like going to work, I go to the market and learn to bargain. The number of items purchased for training purposes is growing at an alarming rate, and I am figuring out who and when I will give them away. I started reducing the price five times almost immediately, after struggling for a couple more days, I improved the result to seven, and then things stalled.

I just can't figure out the crap they're doing to beat me in our argument, and it's pissing me off. NLP doesn't work on them.
...the suitcase announced that I could only buy one more large item. I go for an antique dish that I spotted in a store window. I usually reduce the price by seven times, but this is my last! a chance not to fail my studies, and I continue to bargain.
The situation is heating up.

The owner throws into battle a “silver” antique knife, which I briefly touched, and we start anew. The show goes to a new level, the owner gets into my dish with both feet and jumps in it, proving what an exceptional thing it is.
I already know this, but - at least at 9 am...
Suddenly the owner turns purple and begins to rant in some Berber language, apparently throwing out choice curses.

I get scared and am about to move my feet, but suddenly from the depths of my foggy consciousness emerges the memory that only if the owner swears and curses you, only then can you be sure that you received a more or less fair price. He silently packs the dish, showing with all his appearance that I robbed him, and I snort angrily on the way out.
The next day, when I pass by (I went to the oils section, but bargaining there is blasphemy), he rushes to hug me and drags me in for tea. Every day I explain that I won't buy anything else, and every day the result is that we sit, sip freshly brewed mint and chat about life.
A week later he asks me if I am ready to buy an inkwell. I tried with all my might not to look at the ancient Arabic inkwell, but the more I tried, the more I realized that its place was on my desk.
I don’t want to bargain, I already feel guilty for snatching a museum-quality object from him on the cheap, I know that I’ll take an inkwell for any money and I’m internally preparing for anything, but suddenly the price turns out to be what’s called “without asking.” I go to the shop opposite, buy all sorts of cheesecakes fried in honey, and this time the owner and I not only drink his tea, but also eat my buns.
I feel good. I feel like I'm at home.

Further thesis.
1. Attitude towards children.
I laugh at naive people, who believe that “refugees” are running to save children.
In the Arab world there is no such “tremor” over our children as we have; the attitude towards children is more than calm.
Probably, exactly the same attitude was in Russia 150 years ago, when families had 10-12 children, and there was no way to take special care of them. "God gave - God took."
Arab families still have many children. A lot. With particularly acute curiosity, I talked to people who had 7 children (I was never able to meet parents with so many children on the European continent). It’s no joke, raising so many!
First of all, you see enormous parental fatigue and emotional burnout.

I think that this determines the situation.
And you see very high demands on children - they are seen primarily as an instrument for the family’s survival. A three-year-old boy at the market helps his father lay out something there and tries to attract passers-by - and his father only restrainedly praises him. Who here moaned about the fact that refugee children are forced to work from the age of 6? Do you think they were taken to figure skating by the hand before this?

Yes, by the way, in ordinary local schools children are still punished with a whip.
The complete lack of our sense of significance and the importance of children reaches the point that the parents themselves will ask the girl who has disgraced the family to commit self-immolation. In a good way, in a good way. Otherwise they will have to do it themselves.
Again, there is no desire to condemn this. The same 150 years ago, in our country, a disgraced girl could have just drowned herself, she didn’t care more life there wouldn't be. However, the question is, do those who traveled to Europe from Russia want to end up back in the same Russia, only 150 years ago?
I hope, after my explanation, it will be more clear HOW children end up on leaky rafts on the open sea and how rare “refugee” fathers with small children in their arms for some reason climb to the forefront of clashes with the police.

2. Lies.
Lying is the norm of life. It is so comprehensive that in fact you find yourself in some kind of unreality, like the tales of 1000 and one night, and you will doze off to it, like that Shah.
They can lie about everything. When the plumber arrives, talk about the quality of the product and be sure to talk about any services provided. The “best” guide may not know anything at all about the city, and the “best car” will definitely turn out to be a rare sob.
Sometimes they can lie simply out of generosity. Well, they really want to help you, so they will promise you just to please you (you were happy, right? Well, that’s it for you :), without having any possibility in principle to fulfill what they promised. Having done something “pleasant” for you, they will be very satisfied with themselves and it will not even occur to them to experience any moral inconvenience. And sometimes they can lie with the best intentions, sincerely believing that some other decision will be better for you than the one you are about to take.

3. Theft
Theft is generally not considered something reprehensible. This is, rather, a kind of norm of life, something from the “daring” section.
You can cut tourists' wallets, or you can steal panties from your neighbor's balcony.
So what if your neighbor might start yelling, anyway, tomorrow his son might steal your bike, and you’ll be even.
In general, this is more like a kind of primitive communal consciousness, when everything belongs to one tribe, so the thing can be used by the one who needs it most.
They say that in the Emirates they cut off hands for theft, but I wasn’t there, my mother didn’t allow me. She, like so many others, was extorted at the hotel a large sum on the road, and since I don’t understand how this differs from theft, I decided to refrain from such an extremely ambiguous morality for now..
And we’re not talking about rich, prosperous countries.

4. Hygiene.
To see and understand this in its entirety, everyone needs to live in the medina - the heart of an Arab city.
Of course, it is dangerous to walk alone in the medina, primarily because you will definitely get lost without any chance of getting back, but you can take a guide.
The concept of hygiene does not exist there at all.
Slops are poured at the feet of passers-by, a live bird is gutted right on the same table where it was bought, and if the buyer does not take the offal, then they are again thrown at the feet of passers-by, and it’s good if dogs come to the rescue, but local suffocated people most often do not can consume the volume of offal that is sent to the floor.
The tanning and dyeing industry also dumps its waste somewhere right on the street, which is why there are some white puddles of unknown chemical origin.
And in many places there is a rare, simply fantastic stench on the level of a gas chemical attack.
I’m not criticizing, this way of life has been around for thousands of years, but do you want to be in that millennium?
I won’t tell you about how beautiful and majestic the medina is (especially at sunset, when storks fly home from the fields). Not this time.
Today I will tell you that no matter how many times you go outside the city wall to meet storks, your joy will be overshadowed by the sight of half a dozen men pissing on the thousand-year-old wall of their hometown. No, not in some secluded place, but in front of a couple of dozen people walking here or women and children. But you won’t have time to be offended, because you will immediately see something even more shocking - a couple of men sitting down “seriously”. Everything is right there in plain sight.
The walls of the medina reach 20 meters thick. Although completely stinking, she endures.
What about the walls of your houses?

5. Work
In the West, from childhood, people are instilled with a feeling of guilt if you don’t work (don’t study, don’t put away toys...)
The highest form of imposing this feeling of guilt is subbotniks, when you have to do someone else’s work for free and in your free time.
In the East, the only decent job for a man is trade.
But it’s much more decent to sit in a coffee shop all day, sip coffee and babble with other similar slackers and look at passers-by.
I racked my brains for a long time, what do they live off of, or are they all big-haired heirs?
But then I realized that people live according to the Soviet “accord system” of earning money. Sell ​​someone something for 200% of the price - and again you can sit with respected people in cafes for a month.
If you try to explain there what a “subbotnik” is (just for fun), they will think that you are out of your mind.
But those who believe that a million workers have poured into their hands are much more out of their minds.
And in conclusion, I bring to your attention an absolutely brilliant story (not mine), in which the author himself is not yet able to understand to what heights of foresight he rises.

In this question "who will gather whom, the whale or the elephant?" European culture and mentality will be mechanically replaced Arab world within 5-10 years, if the new arrivals are not sent home.
You can feel sorry for them, you can shed a mean Dostoevsky tear, but the problem is that they will not feel sorry for you, because even if this concept exists in their mentality, it certainly does not apply to you.
Therefore, ask yourself where the line is between pity and a sense of self-preservation, and read the rules of the rescuers.
The rescuer, for your information, must first make sure that his life is not in danger.
P.S. Please note that I am writing without anger, just about what I know well.
If this makes you angry and wants to offend the author, this is your fear looking for a way out. Think about it before you comment.
aurora_hws wrote to pora_valit September 10, 2015