Equality in the family. Relationship. How to achieve equality in the family Household interchangeability of spouses

I am for equality in society, that is, for every person the right to choose what place he wants to occupy and how his relationships should be built. That is, I do not believe that there should be equality in all relationships - in the end, not all women want this, many want to be behind a man as if behind a stone wall, and this is no longer equality.

But in my relationships - yes, I want equality, including (approximately) equal division of labor. In principle, I am not against my man being a wise head of the family, listening to my opinion on important issues, but making decisions, or even being such a head of the family. But for me, both are still small acceptable fluctuations from ideal equality.

Equality between men and women

Equality between men and women is one of the most important issues of the 21st century. Today, morals, views, attitudes towards family, and life values ​​in general, both among men and women, differ significantly from the views of our ancestors.

Equality in the family is an eternal topic of debate between female and male representatives. Women demand equality in all areas of activity, both in family life and in career growth. Moreover, all conflicts that arise as a result of quarrels are most often associated with a misunderstanding of the concept of equality and equity.

Equality between men and women, according to many, is simply an illusion. This is also confirmed by the equality index, which is published annually by the World Economic Forum, which calculates the opportunities of men and women in politics, careers, health and education.

Gender equality

Today, most divorces occur due to conflicts based on inequality and infringement of someone's rights. Women compete with men for leadership, which causes dissatisfaction among men, while a woman completely loses her inherent traits and traditions, becoming a cruel businesswoman. There is one saying: “A woman’s road is from the stove to the threshold.” And this saying, like an obsession, stuck in the brains of both representatives of the sex, just like “men don’t cry.” But in the end, these stereotypes have led to the fact that it is simply impossible for a woman to climb the career ladder, and a man has to drag the burden of responsibility alone under constant doubts about his masculine strength. Equality in relationships will not change, even if thousands of laws and codecs are adopted, and millions of articles on gender are read, many are convinced, until we understand that we are all human, and such concepts as good work, strength, and washing dishes do not depend on whether you are a man or a woman.

It should not be denied that discrimination against the weaker sex still exists and women’s equality presupposes, first of all, equality of opportunity. A burning example: in one company there was a choice between a man and a woman for a high position; preference was given to the man simply because he was male, although the girl was more experienced and more suitable for this position. Where is the logic?

Naturally, another phenomenon became inevitable, namely the struggle for equal rights for women, which entailed many other various problems and phenomena that also focus the gender issue, including the women's movement for equality. Of course, it is clear that we are talking about the fight for equal rights in employment, since it is in this area that women experience extreme disadvantage and refusal. Because the real reason for all refusals by employers is their fear of losing an employee soon after hiring him, because no boss wants to wait for an economist for 2-3 years until she returns from maternity leave, and at the same time, keeping a place for a young mother is also very inconvenient.

Many people wonder whether this gender equality is necessary at all? There are two polar opinions on this question, outlined above. Either for or against. There is no third. But it is worth noting that men also experience some

discrimination, but this is a topic for another article. And it is also unpleasant to realize the existing requirements for women.

Since, gradually agreeing that a woman’s place is not only at the stove, people still continue to demand from her that she now fulfill two roles: a mother responsible for raising children, a husband and a career woman, who realizes herself to the maximum in her career. Also, men are required to be not just good specialists, but also “strong men of this world” and cope with the difficulties that befall both representatives of the couple. And this entire ongoing struggle will not stop until we understand that we are all human, and no one owes anyone anything.

Dictionary of gender terms

Gender equality (egalitarianism)- the feminist interpretation of equality assumes that men and women should have equal shares in social power and equal access to public resources. Equality of the sexes is not the identity of the sexes, the identity of their characteristics and characteristics. At a minimum, the different roles in reproduction do not allow us to talk about identity.

The second step in understanding the term equality there was an awareness of the need for equal rights for all citizens of a democratic society. The implementation of this unconditionally progressive principle of social development has shown its inconsistency and weakness from the point of view of exercising the rights of certain marginal (see Marginality) groups (women, national minorities, etc.).

Hence the emergence of the third stage in the interpretation of egalitarianism in social development. Equality of citizens' rights was now commensurate with equality of opportunity to exercise these rights. The concepts of positive discrimination and equal start are emerging. When (gender) discrimination exists in a society, equal rights do not provide equal opportunities to the discriminated group (women). A system of privileges for such a group makes it possible to “even the chances” and provide an equal start to discriminated against and non-discriminated groups. The creation and implementation of such a system is called positive discrimination.

Feminists have made significant contributions to the development of the concept of equality at every stage of the development of this term. However, the feeling of “understatement” in the concept of equality from the point of view of building a society free from gender discrimination is also present in the latest interpretation of egalitarianism. We continue to operate within the framework of a “male” society, in which women are adjusted to the standard (standard) of male character traits, areas of activity, and professions. “Male” norms are present both in patterns of leadership and management, and in the patterns of most things and objects around us, designed for the average male person.

Often spouses give in to each other on issues that are important to one and not at all important to the other person, but this is not called equality. This is called “establishing everyday life” and adapting to each other, respecting not only your own, but also the opinion of your loved one.

If you meet a family that practices equality, this means one thing - the woman does not want to give the reins of power to a man and is trying to snatch her part of the power at any cost. A strong woman will not be able to maintain equality, piece by piece she will take away dominance in the house, it just won’t happen right away, but may take a couple of years. All this time she will console herself with the thought that they have equality at home.

What exactly is equality? This means that both spouses have equal rights. But how can a woman have equal rights with a man? Can she also earn money and disappear outside the home? Can she make decisions too? Can she solve problems too? But it turns out that a man can also cook food and keep things clean? Equality at its core is the demand of women to become men. Stop fulfilling your feminine responsibilities, follow your nature, and do what is typical for men. And since their work must also be done, the husband can do it. So this is not equality, it is just a change of responsibilities!

Imagine what will happen if on a ship the cook takes the helm and starts steering the ship, and the captain goes to the kitchen to cook? The ship will clearly go off course, and the crew will eat burnt lunch.

Of course, I'm exaggerating. Sometimes a man can cook something too. And a woman can earn money. But the course must still be set correctly. The head of the family is one person, and who he is is decided by each family. But there is no equality in the family, let's call a spade a spade. Who is the boss in your family?

Equality in relationships between men and women

To obey or compete with a man - sooner or later any representative of the fairer sex asks herself this question. In relationships with a loved one, boss or friend, beautiful ladies always choose a certain model of behavior for themselves and then follow it. To be led or to strive for equality - which is better? In this article we will discuss everything about equality in relationships between men and women. It's no secret that women are much weaker than men physiologically in relationships and equality. Even in biology lessons, we were taught that the muscles of girls are developed 25% less than those of boys, and the working capacity of the fair half of humanity does not exceed 75% relative to the stronger sex. Men are more likely to be born geniuses, and their IQ is on average five points higher than that of women.

Nature has decreed that ladies, whether they want it or not, must ask for help and seek support from a stronger creature in order to simply survive. Carrying heavy bags from the store, chopping wood for the fireplace, opening a tightly screwed lid on a jar - all these duties are elementary for men, while for a woman they can be a real problem. In addition, the stronger sex, under the influence of testosterone, which predominates in their body, is more decisive, enterprising and success-oriented than young ladies.

Of course, at first glance, such a significant male advantage over women should orient the weak half of humanity toward complete submission and humility before more resilient creatures.

After all, according to the laws of all life on Earth, the strongest survive! However, in the modern world, in order to achieve heights in your career, gain recognition in society and simply be happy, you need not only strength and intelligence. Flexibility, sensitivity, sociability, diligence, practicality, the ability to quickly respond to changing circumstances and attention to detail are necessary qualities for existence in society. And don’t all of the above traits meet the requirements for an ideal manager or leader?

According to the latest medical research, 90% of beautiful ladies master them perfectly in relationships. In addition, the weaker half of humanity builds relationships with colleagues much better, because a female boss sees in her subordinate, first of all, a person and personality who deserve a good job and decent pay. For a male boss, his employees are cogs on which his own success depends. Therefore, working with a lady boss is much more comfortable. Nature is fair - it has equalized the chances of success for both sexes.

But the winners in life are those women who recognize and fully accept their own weaknesses, turning them into their main strengths in relationships and equality. Then the question of competition, as well as submission to a man, does not arise for such ladies. They do not fight with themselves and do not suppress the softness, sensitivity and flexibility given to them by nature, but simply skillfully use them, insisting on their opinion carefully and carefully. The stronger sex is always pleased to realize that next to him there are beautiful, self-confident, and most importantly, harmonious, spiritually rich representatives of the fair sex. Men, of their own free will, in relationships and equality, are ready to lay the whole world at the feet of such women. In essence, what the ladies expect from them. Therefore, live your life enjoying a pleasant team, a clear sunny day, the success of your children, your image in the mirror, and often remember the words of the legendary James Brown song “This is a man’s world, but there would be nothing in it without women!”

Okay, let’s imagine a situation: my wife came home drunk. How will your family and friends react to this? I don't think it's very good. What if a man comes drunk? The girls will say that there is nothing good here either. Agree. However, the attitude towards him from others will not be so bad. So it means that the relationship is not so equal if they judge us differently.

Now let's imagine a normal situation. For example, a controversial situation arose between a man and a woman. A man says one thing, and a woman says another. How to get out of this situation? But actually, no way. Because someone has to give in. And there is no one to give in to, because you are equal. This means there is no leader. There is no person who will have the last word.

What is equality in the family?

In general, the meaning of the word “equality” in relation to family relationships means that both men and women should work, replenishing the family piggy bank, and in their free time share family responsibilities equally.

But, for some reason, most women believe that we, as they say, “we ran into what we fought for.” That is, currently, in our world, women who are so wanted equal rights with men, thought - was it worth it? After all, with the advent of equality, women have a large number of additional responsibilities. If previously a man was obliged to provide for his family, and his wife was obliged to run the household, then now both should work, but everyday life still remained on the woman’s fragile shoulders.

Modern women complain that men have become infantile, that they do not strive for anything. Of course, they used to need this to win and keep a woman! And now the woman is already the CEO herself or has her own business.

Most women, according to research, would like to return everything back. Where the man was gallant and courteous. When he didn't blame the problem on the woman. When he was the main breadwinner of the family. But it is impossible to reverse history. And we have to rejoice in the “fruits of our hands.”

Equality - the ideal model of relationships?

A family and, in general, family relationships can be compared to a ship. It depends on how the control of this very ship is organized whether the ship will reach its final destination or sink somewhere along the way. As we know, it is always present on the ship one and only captain. He is the one who controls the ship. Of course, he has assistants. Without them, it would be difficult for him to manage. But the roles and responsibilities are very clearly distributed among the assistants. The assistants know even before the ship departs what will they do on the ship. No one argues with the captain about their responsibilities. That is why there is always perfect order on the ship.

Now let's get back to family relationships. Since a family is so similar to a ship (a family boat), then management in the family should be built in the same way as on a ship. That is there must be a clear division of responsibilities. Each family member must be responsible for certain actions of the family as a whole.

As we know, there are no two captains on a ship. There is an assistant captain, but that's all The captain himself makes the main decisions. So who should play such a role in the family? It's best to leave this to your husband. Why? Because the captain is not only the commander who makes all the decisions, but also the one who is responsible for these decisions. A It is best for a man to be responsible in the family.

Choosing one or another for your family relationship model, remember - there is no complete 100% equality in nature. Therefore, if you choose equality for your family, be prepared that the main issues will fall on you. Moreover, you will have to answer for the consequences.

Business experts are simply convinced that if a company has a block of shares distributed between two owners, that is, neither of them has a controlling stake, then such a company is doomed to failure. Because the main and final decision should remain with one single person.

Another comparison can be made. Automobile. As we all know, it only has one steering wheel. What would happen if there were two steering wheels? Each of the passengers would turn it in their own direction, and the car would ultimately remain in place or become uncontrollable. Using this example, it is easy to draw a parallel between a car and married life.

Even now, when women it seems achieved equality, men receive higher wages. There are even statistics on this matter. Therefore, we can admit that men are much better at earning money than women. And for a woman - to maintain comfort in the house and a good mood. These roles were distributed during the creation of man. So why change these roles now?

Also, pay attention to those women who have spent their entire lives solving family problems! They look much older than their actual age. Do you really think that's good? Do you really want to look fifty at forty?

Think and remember for yourself all those families in which the commander-in-chief is the wife. Are these families really happy? from such a distribution of roles?

But, of course, it’s up to you to decide which one relationship model choose, just the two of you. Let's put an equal sign between two expressions: equality - the right to choose. This will really happen ideal model of family relationships!

Sources

1. 
   Petrushin, S.V. Love and other human relationships / S.V. Petrushin. - M.: Rech, 2014. - 144 p.
2. 
   Chukovsky, Korney From two to five / Korney Chukovsky. - M.: Narodnaya Asveta, 2015. - 319 p.
3. 
   Van, Pelt N. Find and hold / Van Pelt N. - M.: Source of Life, 2002. - 971 p.
4. Steele, Lilia I am a woman. Modern encyclopedia of women / Lilia Steele. - M.: Ripol Classic, 2017. - 512 p.
5. Osminina, Natalia Resurrection of the face, or an ordinary miracle. Thoughts that create a woman's youth. Thoughts that create beauty and youth for a woman up to 100 years old and beyond. Ten secrets of Love (set of 4 books) / Natalia Osminina, Georgy Sytin, Adam.J. Jackson. - M.: IG “Ves”, Sofia, 2015. - 564 p.

SURVEY DATA

Equality in the family: from declarations to reality?

A revolution in Russians’ ideas about the distribution of family roles has already occurred. Now it’s a matter of changing real behavior, but it still largely remains traditional.

Analytical review

Tables

Infographics

A comment

Methodology

Briefly about the main thing

• Only 1% of Russians believe that the head of the family should be a woman
• Washing, ironing, cooking in most cases in married couples is the responsibility of the fair sex

MOSCOW, March 6, 2018 The All-Russian Center for the Study of Public Opinion (VTsIOM) presents data from a study dedicated to International Women's Day. Both in theory and in practice, Russians advocate equality in the family: 82% of all respondents believe that this should be the case, 72% of those married/living together/dating say that in practice they make all decisions together (since 2009 - 34% - this figure has doubled). Those who still put one person from a married couple at the forefront are more likely to call a man the head of the family (16% say that this should be the case, 21% say that this is what happens in their relationship) than a woman (1% and 6% respectively). Nominally equality in family responsibilities is declared in almost all areas,which is largely realized in practice. First of all, representatives of married couples talk about organizing leisure time together (the gender equality index* is 86 points), buying groceries (84 points) and gifts for friends (85 points), as well as activities with children (72 points) and etc. Today, purely female responsibilities include (considered the norm) only washing clothes, while men’s duties include minor repairs (in my experience, in married couples, 72% of women do laundry, 67% of men do repairs). At the same time, some functions are still distributed quite traditionally: not only washing, but also ironing, cooking, cleaning are women’s affairs, married couples are recognized. However, in recent years there has been a positive trend in the answer “we do it together.” The majority (61%) provide financial support for the family jointly (the index is 80 points), as well as budget management (59% and 79 points, respectively). On average, men believe that a woman should contribute a third of the total budget (32%), while women give an average figure of 43%. Men in relationships (married/living together/dating) say they contribute about 75%, women – 44%. *Gender Equality Index shows how equally family responsibilities are distributed between men and women. The higher the index value, the higher the level of equality. The index is calculated as the sum of answers to the question: “How are the following responsibilities distributed in your family/couple?”, and the answer “together” is assigned a coefficient of 1, the answers “man” and “woman” are assigned a coefficient of 0.5, and the remaining answers are assigned a coefficient of 0. The index is measured in points ranging from 50 to 100.

VTsIOM analyst Ivan Lekontsev comments on the survey data: “The greatest gender equality in Russian families is observed on one of the most pressing issues – financial. Men and women now earn money together, plan family expenses together, and believe that this is how it should be. The old stereotype that the husband must fully provide for the family has been irreversibly destroyed. Although for now men continue to claim that their contribution to the family budget is more than 50%, and mostly women agree with them. But there are areas where practice lags behind ideas about what should be: for example, according to Russians, the “ideal” level of equality has not yet been achieved in the areas of raising children, paying bills, and ironing things. In a large number of families, these responsibilities still fall only on women. Full equality is most likely unattainable. However, for now, Russians’ ideas about the need for gender equality are undoubtedly ahead of practice, which means that practice will inevitably change.”

The initiative all-Russian survey "VTsIOM-Sputnik" was conducted on February 28-March 1, 2018. Russians aged 18 years and older took part in the survey. The survey method is a telephone interview using a stratified two-base random sample of landline and mobile numbers of 2000 respondents. The sample was built on the basis of a complete list of telephone numbers used in the Russian Federation. Data are weighted for selection probability and sociodemographic parameters. For this sample, the maximum error with a probability of 95% does not exceed 2.2%. In addition to sampling error, survey data can be biased by the wording of questions and various circumstances that arise during fieldwork. In 2009, 2011 Household surveys were conducted.

Contains questions of this thematic block and socio-demographic variables.

Do you think the head of the family/couple SHOULD BE A MAN, SHOULD BE A WOMAN, OR BOTH THE MAN AND THE WOMAN SHOULD MAKE major decisions JOINTLY? (closed question, one answer, %)

	All respondents	Men	Women	Single (not married) and not in a relationship	Married)	We live together, but are not officially married	We are dating, living separately, not officially married	We live separately, but not divorced	Divorced (divorced)	Widower (widow)
The head of the family/couple is the man, he makes the main decisions	16	18	13	21	16	13	8	13	15	15
The head of the family/couple is the woman, she makes the main decisions	1	0	1	1	1	1	0	0	1	1
Both men and women are equal members of the family/couple and make major decisions together	82	79	85	76	83	85	91	87	83	81
I find it difficult to answer	1	3	1	2	0	1	1	0	1	3

WHO DO YOU THINK IS THE HEAD OF YOUR FAMILY/COUPLE? (closed question, one answer, % of married, living together, dating)

How do you think the following responsibilities should be distributed in a family/couple? (closed question, one answer per line, % of NOT married, NOT living together, NOT dating) 2018

	Man	Woman	Together	Another family/couple member		I find it difficult to answer
	3	7	88	0	0	2
Leisure organization	6	6	85	0	0	3
	3	15	79	1	0	2
Buying groceries	7	15	76	0	0	2
Pet care	10	10	69	0	6	5
Budget management	10	22	66	0	0	2
Washing dishes	1	31	64	0	1	3
Payment of bills	23	14	61	0	0	2
House cleaning	1	39	60	0	0	0
	38	2	59	0	0	1
Cooking	2	38	58	0	0	2
Ironing things	1	42	48	0	1	8
Minor home repairs	59	2	37	0	0	2
Laundry	1	59	35	0	2	3

How are the following responsibilities distributed in your family/couple?

	Year/answer option	Man	Woman	Together	Another family/couple member	There is no such obligation in a family/couple	I find it difficult to answer	Gender Equality Index
Leisure organization	2018	8	14	75	0	2	1	86
Leisure organization	2011	6	23	57	6	8	-	72
Buying gifts for friends, relatives, colleagues, congratulating them on the holidays	2018	3	24	71	1	0	1	85
Buying gifts for friends, relatives, colleagues, congratulating them on the holidays	2011	4	31	56	5	4	-	74
Buying groceries	2018	11	22	67	0	0	0	84
Buying groceries	2011	6	38	50	5	1	-	72
Financial support for a family/couple	2018	36	2	61	1	0	0	80
Budget management	2018	12	27	59	0	1	1	79
Washing dishes	2018	4	41	52	0	2	1	75
Washing dishes	2011	5	57	31	6	1	-	62
Activities with children, walks, checking homework	2018	3	22	59	0	13	3	72
Activities with children, walks, checking homework	2011	3	26	29	4	38	-	44
House cleaning	2018	2	50	46	1	1	0	72
House cleaning	2011	4	60	29	6	1	-	61
Cooking	2018	2	57	40	0	0	1	70
Cooking	2011	4	65	24	6	1	-	59
Payment of bills	2018	33	31	34	1	1	0	66
Payment of bills	2011	16	44	31	8	1	-	61
Pet care	2018	13	14	51	1	18	3	65
Pet care	2011	7	22	31	7	33	-	46
Minor home repairs	2018	67	3	28	0	1	1	63
Minor home repairs	2011	56	11	21	9	3	-	55
Ironing things	2018	2	63	27	1	5	2	60
Ironing things	2011	3	74	13	8	2	-	52
Laundry	2018	1	72	21	0	4	2	58
Laundry	2011	3	74	15	7	1	-	54

Equality in the family - is this really good? What advantages does equality give men and what benefits does it give women? Is this relationship model ideal? in modern society?

What is equality in the family?

In general, the meaning of the word “equality” in relation to family relationships means that both men and women should work, replenishing the family piggy bank, and in their free time share family responsibilities equally.

But, for some reason, most women believe that we, as they say, “we ran into what we fought for.” That is, currently, in our world, women who are so wanted equal rights with men, thought - was it worth it? After all, with the advent of equality, women have a large number of additional responsibilities. If previously a man was obliged to provide for his family, and his wife was obliged to run the household, then now both should work, but everyday life still remained on the woman’s fragile shoulders.

Modern women complain that men have become infantile, that they do not strive for anything. Of course, they used to need this to win and keep a woman! And now the woman is already the CEO herself or has her own business.

Most women, according to research, would like to return everything back. Where the man was gallant and courteous. When he didn't blame the problem on the woman. When he was the main breadwinner of the family. But it is impossible to reverse history. And we have to rejoice in the “fruits of our hands.”

Is equality the ideal model of relationships?

A family and, in general, family relationships can be compared to a ship. It depends on how the control of this very ship is organized whether the ship will reach its final destination or sink somewhere along the way. As we know, it is always present on the ship one and only captain. He is the one who controls the ship. Of course, he has assistants. Without them, it would be difficult for him to manage. But the roles and responsibilities are very clearly distributed among the assistants. The assistants know even before the ship departs what will they do on the ship. No one argues with the captain about their responsibilities. That is why there is always perfect order on the ship.

Now let's get back to family relationships. Since a family is so similar to a ship (a family boat), then management in the family should be built in the same way as on a ship. That is there must be a clear division of responsibilities. Each family member must be responsible for certain actions of the family as a whole.

As we know, there are no two captains on a ship. There is an assistant captain, but that's all The captain himself makes the main decisions. So who should play such a role in the family? It's best to leave this to your husband. Why? Because the captain is not only the commander who makes all the decisions, but also the one who is responsible for these decisions. A It is best for a man to be responsible in the family.

Choosing one or another for your family relationship model, remember - there is no complete 100% equality in nature. Therefore, if you choose equality for your family, be prepared that the main issues will fall on you. Moreover, you will have to answer for the consequences.

Business experts are simply convinced that if a company has a block of shares distributed between two owners, that is, neither of them has a controlling stake, then such a company is doomed to failure. Because the main and final decision should remain with one single person.

Another comparison can be made. Automobile. As we all know, it only has one steering wheel. What would happen if there were two steering wheels? Each of the passengers would turn it in their own direction, and the car would ultimately remain in place or become uncontrollable. Using this example, it is easy to draw a parallel between a car and married life.

Even now, when women it seems achieved equality, men receive higher wages. There are even statistics on this matter. Therefore, we can admit that men are much better at earning money than women. And for a woman - to maintain comfort in the house and a good mood. These roles were distributed during the creation of man. So why change these roles now?

Also, pay attention to those women who have spent their entire lives solving family problems! They look much older than their actual age. Do you really think that's good? Do you really want to look fifty at forty?

Think and remember for yourself all those families in which the commander-in-chief is the wife. Are these families really happy? from such a distribution of roles?

But, of course, it’s up to you to decide which one relationship model choose, just the two of you. Let's put an equal sign between two expressions: equality - the right to choose. This will really happen ideal model of family relationships!

Wisdom and mutual understanding to you!

The principle of marriage equality

The presence of equal rights granted to men and women who are participants in family legal relations is a feature of family law, which is reflected in Art. 19 of the Constitution of the Russian Federation, as well as Art. 31 of the RF IC, and means equality of spouses in the family. Thus, the state recognizes the equality of the sexes, and their personal non-property rights are considered equal.

Thanks to the legally established equality of rights for participants in family relationships, equality of spouses in the family is achieved, which allows each spouse to be sure that the protection of these rights is not only their own task, but also an obligation of the state.

The provisions of the IC classify the personal non-property rights and obligations of spouses that are vested in spouses. These include: the right to choose the type of occupation, professional activity, place of residence and stay.

Thus, each of the subjects of family relations has the right to independently choose a specialty for employment. The place of residence must be determined between the spouses, which makes it possible to say that the husband and wife can live separately.

The sphere of rights also includes the right to be a mother and father, the right to raise children, to participate in their life and education. These issues are resolved by mutual consent of the spouses, as evidenced by the principle of their equality.

The construction of marital relations is carried out on the basis of mutual respect and mutual assistance, which contributes to a prosperous and strong union aimed at the well-being of the family and the development of children.

Property and personal non-property rights of spouses

Throughout life, every person has a certain range of rights, which are both property and non-property in nature. With marriage, the range of rights expands. Thus, even before marriage, future spouses have the right to choose a surname. They have the opportunity to keep their own, change it to the surname of one of the spouses, or combine them into a double one.

Upon marriage, spouses have the right to choose their place of residence and the direction of their professional activities.

Among the personal non-property rights are:

• mandatory joint decision-making regarding family life;
• providing consent to the adoption process;
• the right to dissolve a marriage.

The range of property relations that are typical for married persons is quite extensive. This includes all rights that may be associated with property, as well as relations that are associated with the occurrence of alimony obligations in relation to children, as well as mutual maintenance of husband and wife.

It should be noted that the existence of the right of common joint property among spouses arises regardless of the level of income of each of them individually. This means that the legislator does not make the emergence of rights dependent on the degree of material contribution of each spouse. Thus, a wife who is engaged in housekeeping and raising children has equal rights to property, which is recognized as joint property.

Types of personal non-property rights

At its core, marriage is a legal fact that gives rise to a number of non-property rights among its participants. Spouses are equal bearers of them.

Personal rights of a non-property nature affect those interests that are limited to the personality of the spouse. They cannot be separated from the bearer, even if there is the will of their owner; in addition, transactions cannot be made in relation to them, and they themselves are not subject to monetary valuation.

The UK defines 3 types of personal rights of married persons:

• the right to free choice of profession and activity, location and residence;
• the right to make joint decisions on issues that relate to the family and living together in this status;
• the right to choose a future surname, which implies the opportunity to leave the original surnames, take the surname of one of the spouses, or combine both surnames into a double one.

Such a small range of personal rights can be explained as a result of the specificity of marriage relations, which cannot be fully regulated by the state.

Disagreements or violation of these rights on the part of one or each of the spouses may cause divorce.

Protection of personal non-property rights

Personal non-property rights and obligations that spouses have from the moment of marriage are determined by the legal norms that are in force today in the state. They are reflected both in the Constitution of the Russian Federation and in the UK.

In addition to the rights that are inherent to every person, spouses have the right to choose a surname, type of activity and place of residence, as well as to make decisions regarding the further development of marital relations, including their dissolution.

This type of rights is directly connected with the personality of the spouses, and therefore is not subject to separation, monetary valuation, or transfer under various types of transactions.

And, although the range of personal non-property rights of spouses is quite narrow, which is caused by the specificity of family relationships based on making joint decisions, the state establishes, regulates and protects them.

The protection of such rights is carried out by providing the opportunity to protect them within the framework of the administration of justice.

Thus, a spouse who believes that his rights have been violated by the second spouse has the right to file a lawsuit with a demand to stop the violation of his rights and restore them.

Legal proceedings in such cases are carried out not in a general manner, on the basis of the norms of the Criminal Code, but in a procedural sense, in accordance with the provisions of the Code of Civil Procedure.

In cases where the principle of equality between spouses is violated, divorce may occur.

Responsibility for violation of rights in the family

The equality of spouses in the family gives grounds to say that the volume of personal non-property rights to which spouses are allocated is equal for each of them.

The provisions of family law, as well as civil law, which is inextricably linked with the regulation of family relations, determine the general rules for liability for violation of such rights.

Those rights that are associated with the concept of “honor”, ​​“dignity” and are established by the norms of the Civil Code are on the same level with those rights that arise for spouses from the moment of marriage and are established by the Civil Code.

The IC itself does not define the procedures for protecting rights, referring to the provisions of the Civil Procedure Code, in accordance with which the protection of rights is carried out in court. Violations of the equality of spouses in the family, which are inextricably linked with their personality, are subject to restoration in court. It may be noted that the Insurance Code, Civil Code and Civil Procedure Code do not establish liability for violation of the non-property rights of spouses.

Violation of such rights is the cause of moral distress.

In the course of judicial consideration of this category of cases, the court can only restore the person’s rights and consider the issue of collecting compensation for the moral suffering suffered.

Time does not stand still, and with it human relationships and society as a whole change. The patriarchal structure of the social unit is being replaced by an egalitarian family. "What is it?" - the reader will ask. This is the topic of our conversation today. If we reveal all the cards at once, the intrigue will die. Therefore, there is no need to rush.

Definition and signs

An egalitarian family is a relationship in which neither spouse claims power; it is divided equally between the man and the woman. The same thing happens with social roles and everyday responsibilities. There is no division into “male” and “female”. The one who can does it.

Is it clear what an egalitarian family is? The signs that characterize it follow below.

1. The primacy of individual interests over family (tribal) interests. In practice, this means that each family member wants not only to fulfill his family, gender role, but also to achieve something in the professional sphere. Therefore, relationships should be built in such a way that the husband and wife have room for creativity and realization.
2. A family is created by the mutual desire of a man and a woman. The determining factor is everyone's personal choice. It seems that no explanation is needed here. In theory, an egalitarian family is an entity that is created only because a man and a woman love each other. But, as we know, theory and practice do not always coincide.
3. No more than two generations (parents and children) live under one roof.
4. The couple is planning children together.
5. Few children. With all the ensuing consequences: the emphasis is on the “quality” of children, not the “quantity”. That is, the spouses set a goal to prepare their children for social life as much as possible: to raise them properly, to give them an education that will help their offspring get a good, interesting and well-paid job. Since there are not many children (one or two), the man and woman do not forget about themselves and combine parental functions with other social roles. As an inevitable result: sex is perceived as a source of pleasure, and not a means of reproduction.
6. High degree of social and geographical mobility. Simply put, the saying “where you were born is where you come in handy” is not about members of an egalitarian family. People change jobs and places of residence if necessary. Not to say that this happens easily and freely, but no one makes a tragedy out of it either.
7. Spouses are legally equal in the ownership and inheritance of family property.

An egalitarian family is a revolutionary thing that allows both men and women to “breathe freely.” But without comparison with other types of family relationships, one cannot fully appreciate its significance.

Types of family. Patriarchy

What are the alternatives? There are also patriarchal and matriarchal families. Let's talk about them very briefly to understand the difference.

Characteristic features of a patriarchal family:

Needless to say that “democratic relations” is a concept unknown to people who live according to the patriarchal canon?

Matriarchy

It is more difficult to talk about matriarchy as a social structure, because many are still convinced that it did not exist. Although Erich Fromm, referring to Bakhoven, refutes this point of view. In other words, the debate is ongoing. The problem is that when people talk about ancient times, then history, archeology and mythology come together, and it is not possible to separate one from the other. In any case, it was so long ago that it is difficult to talk about it in detail; we will indicate only those signs that are definitely known:

1. The family is created around a woman, not a man.
2. Inheritance of property and valuables is passed down through the maternal line.
3. Pedigree is calculated from the mother and female representatives of the clan.

Matriarchy is certainly an interesting phenomenon, especially its “modern version”: when formally the relationship has the status of “egalitarian family” (it’s clear what that is), but in fact it’s matriarchal, where the man is a subordinate element (the same is true for patriarchy, when the wife depends on her husband with formal equality of the parties).

Concluding the conversation, let’s say that there are enough supporters of both matriarchal and patriarchal families in the world. There are also countries where models function; it is difficult for Westerners to judge their success.

Household interchangeability of spouses

After a quick look at family arrangements, it became clear why egalitarian is preferable for both certain men and some women. However, let's look at it from different angles.

Advantages:

• equality;
• understanding;
• Liberty;
• mobility;
• dialogue as a way of family existence.

On paper, the model is so good that it is difficult to find flaws in it. At this point we must remember that traditions are strong in Russia, that is, not all the people around us support progressive ideas in general and the idea of ​​a family in which each family member does not what the gender role requires of him, but what he can do. in particular. Therefore, if we note the shortcomings, let’s say: the model can cause individual intolerance in some people, as well as develop complexes if a couple practices “equal marriage” in a patriarchal environment.

Social equality of husband and wife

An egalitarian marriage involves not only the rights, but also the responsibilities of both the wife and the husband. The fact that in this system of relationships a man and a woman are interchangeable redistributes priorities. For example, money ceases to be a purely male problem. On the one hand, this is good, because the husband no longer feels lonely in this sense, he knows that if something happens to him, his wife will help not only morally, but also financially. On the other hand, this is bad because a woman and a man will no longer be able to appeal to a person’s gender role and conscience using the epic phrase: “You’re a man!” or “You’re a woman!” Here everyone is responsible for the other and for the common offspring.

Emotional intensity

From the basic principles of such a marriage follows another characteristic feature of an egalitarian family, which is included in the subtitle. It might be strange to classify emotions in relationships as a separate group. But since the model offers a qualitatively different interaction, why not say that equality has a beneficial effect on Love blossoms if it grows on the soil of freedom. And repression is needed only to fight the undesirable; oppression cannot evoke love. When one spouse does not respect or appreciate the other, and this continues throughout life, then grievances accumulate, and they, even unspoken ones, poison the family environment.

An egalitarian marriage is seen in this sense as the complete opposite of both patriarchy and matriarchy. Don't think that this is some kind of ideal. Firstly, there are so few truly equal relationships (why, we’ll talk below), and secondly, the majority of egalitarian families in form are, in content, modern patriarchy and matriarchy. For example, when both work, but when the man says: “That’s a woman’s business!” And the wife, on occasion, reminds: “Be a man!” We think the reader understands perfectly what we are talking about. Of course, we can say that the egalitarian family, like any synthesis, contains in itself, in a sublated form, the qualities of thesis and antithesis, obeying the laws of Hegelian dialectics. But interpretation is a matter of taste.

Egalitarian marriage is a fragile entity

It turns out that equal marriage is pure pleasure? Not certainly in that way. The primacy of personal interests over family interests is fraught with many problems. For example, you can recall the film and book “The World According to Garp”. When spouses tried not to limit each other and even, if possible, forgive infidelity. Garp's wife managed, at the very least, but he himself did not. Moreover, one should not think that a democratic marriage presupposes moral anarchy and sexual freedom. This is, rather, an illustration of what a misinterpretation of freedom and equality leads to. Such a family structure is suitable only for mature people who are ready to take responsibility. If family and marriage are a way to adapt to life, then it is unlikely that equal and free from repression relationships are what is needed.

And lastly: freedom is wonderful, but it requires a habit, and a person must also have a certain amount of intelligence in order to know where rights end and responsibilities begin. As Bernard Shaw said: “Freedom means responsibility, which is why most people are afraid of it.” And without freedom you cannot build equal and emotionally rich relationships. Modern life offers at least three models to choose from for building relationships. And these are only global possibilities, but there are so many practical variations between them! Therefore, everyone decides for themselves.