What is passion between a man? Why passion is important in relationships. Passion and love: what relationships are built on


Our most unforgettable experiences are associated with love and physical attraction. In moments of love, we are filled with bright emotions, inspired and happy. The world is filled with colors when we love and they love us.

Passion and love are incredibly different emotions, they are delightful and have a positive effect on us. There are situations when we cannot distinguish whether we love or just feel a strong attraction to a person. And some people generally confuse these two sensations. So what is passion?

What is this

In psychology, physical attraction is a strong attraction that is accompanied by the desire to master the object of attraction.

Attraction can be felt not only to people, but also to ideas, thoughts, objects and activities. At such moments, we turn off our minds and do not see reality - we are completely immersed in a feeling of attraction, we are capable of crazy actions that previously seemed impossible.

The feeling of attraction arises in our lives very often, and a very small number of people can cope with such an emotional flow, but still many are able to take control of their emotions. We will describe below what this feeling is and what its varieties are.

  • Pursuit of your hobby. While doing what you love, you are not distracted by anything, but are completely immersed in the fulfillment of your plans. You are at the limit of your physical and psychological capabilities.
  • Craving for extreme desires. In extreme moments, people experience a strong surge of adrenaline into the blood. At the same time, breathlessness takes away, limbs begin to go numb, people cannot catch their breath. This is an intoxicating state for those who do not like to live a boring life.
  • Attraction to a person or strong sexual desire. At the moment of feeling attraction, a person’s pupils dilate and he is in an excited state. Very often the feeling of attraction is mistaken for love.

This feeling does not last long, but at such a moment the body is at the limit of its capabilities, this is the peak of the most intense sensations. Basically, people cannot be restrained at the moment of attraction - we will tell you below how to determine whether you are experiencing passion or love.

  • When a person sees a desired object, inexplicable emotions appear. These are feelings of excitement, anxiety and joy of meeting at the same time. At the moment of the meeting, a person cannot convey his emotions, while he emotional condition positive.
  • A person has different kinds of desires. I want to do something crazy and impossible, the power of desire makes people do what they previously thought was beyond their power.
  • A constant desire to be close to the object of your desire. Passion brings people together through tactile contact.

How to regain attraction to your partner

During long-term relationships, sometimes the feeling of attraction towards the “other half” leaves us. This feeling is replaced by a tender and caring feeling of love.

But often people break up, thinking that the feelings have passed. Don't make hasty decisions; we'll tell you how to bring passion back into your relationship with your loved one. Try to follow these tips.

It's time to awaken your memory. Remember what you were like when you started your relationship with your partner. Remember absolutely all the details, collecting it “little by little” unique picture your love.

What did you do for your loved one? You flirted and made advances, you were cheerful and happy, you gave gifts and wanted to surprise. You called on any occasion to hear the voice and say something nice, making your partner smile. You were ready to give flowers and carry them in your arms, you radiated beauty, you made a person happy.

Arouse trembling feelings in your partner, go through common memories. Spend the evening together and remember how you met, how you started living together, how you kissed for the first time. Bring tenderness and pleasant nostalgia to your partner.

Tell your partner what you love about him. Tell us what makes you happy when a person is present next to you. Tell me how you feel when your partner kisses or hugs you. Tell me what's going on inside you. Tell me how your heart skips a beat when he touches you.

Invite your partner on a date, add brightness and new sensations to your relationship. Do something new, fly hot-air balloon, get a dog or cat without hesitation. Do something crazy, but together. Ask your partner what he would like to do, what his most secret and wonderful dreams are. Do it with him, no matter what it is. Give him the happiness of fulfilling his dream. Support the madness, just do it and it doesn't matter what they think of you.

Flirt with your partner, act as if you have just met. Next, your subconscious will do everything for you. It will give your relationship a new physical attraction to each other. Revive your relationship, start living and loving.

Become lovers again, surprise and support your partner's ideas when he wants something. Being simple and open is very strong quality, but few people use it.

Be simple and loving, give smiles to passers-by, pick flowers from flower beds and give them to your loved ones. Create ease in your life and it will manifest itself in everything. Author: Inna Rykberg

From the Church Slavonic language the word passion translated as suffering(hence, for example, the word passion-bearer, that is suffering, torment). And indeed, nothing torments people more - neither illnesses nor anything else - than their own passions, deep-rooted sins. First, they serve to satisfy sinful needs, and then people themselves begin to serve them: everyone who commits sin is a slave of sin (John 8:34).

Of course, in every passion there is a moment of sinful pleasure for a person, but nevertheless passions torment, torment and enslave the sinner.

Most shining example Passionate addiction is alcoholism, drug addiction and smoking. Alcohol and drugs not only become part of a person’s soul, but also enter into the metabolism of his substances, become part of the biochemical processes in his body, he physically feels unwell when these substances are absent from his blood. That is, it is a spiritual-physical dependence. And it needs to be treated in two ways - both soul and body. But at the core is sin, passion. An alcoholic or drug addict's family falls apart, he is kicked out of work, he loses friends, but he sacrifices all this to passion. A person addicted to alcohol and drugs is ready to commit any crime to satisfy his passion. It is not without reason that most murders are committed under the influence of alcohol and drugs. That's how strong the demon of drunkenness is!

Other passions can enslave the soul no less. But in in this case this is further enhanced by bodily dependence.

Sin primarily harms the person who sinned. A in the case of passions the harm from sin increases many times over, because it becomes permanent, takes on the character of a chronic disease.

As St. John Climacus says: “Passion is the name given to the very vice that has been embedded in the soul for a long time and through habit has become, as it were, a natural property of it, so that the soul already voluntarily and by itself strives towards it.” That is passion- this is something more than a sin, it is - sinful dependence, slavery to a certain type of vice.

Most of the holy fathers talk about eight passions: 1) gluttony (gluttony); 2) fornication; 3) love of money; 4) anger; 5) sadness; 6) despondency; 7) vanity; 8) pride.

Some theologians, speaking about the passions, combine sadness and despondency.

Sometimes the eight passions are called mortal sins. Passions have this name because they can (if they completely take over a person) disrupt spiritual life, deprive them of salvation and lead to eternal death. According to the holy fathers, behind every passion there is a certain demon, dependence on which makes a person captive to a certain vice.

Saint John Cassian the Roman writes that the first six passions occur as if from one another; “the excess of the previous one gives rise to the next one.”

For example, from excessive gluttony comes prodigal passion; from fornication - love of money; from the love of money - anger; from anger - sadness; from sadness - despondency. And each of them is treated by expelling the previous one. For example, to win lustful passion, need to bind gluttony; to overcome sadness, you need to cope with anger, etc.

Vanity and pride are especially important. But they are also interconnected. Vanity gives rise to pride, and you need to fight pride by defeating vanity. The worst thing is that passions do not disappear with the death of the body. The body, as the instrument with which a person most often commits sin, dies, disappears, and the inability to satisfy one’s passions is what will torment and burn a person after death.

The Holy Fathers say that there passions will torment a person much more than on earth, without sleep and rest, they will burn like fire. And not only bodily passions will torment people without finding satisfaction, such as fornication or drunkenness. But also spiritual ones: pride, vanity, anger - after all, there will also be no way to satisfy them. And most importantly, a person will also not be able to fight passions; this is only possible on earth, because earthly life is given for repentance and correction. What and whom a person served in earthly life, he will be with in eternity. If he serves his passions and the devil, he will remain with them. For example, for a drug addict, hell is an endless, never-ending “withdrawal”; for an alcoholic, it is an eternal hangover, etc. But if a person served God and was with Him on earth, he can hope that he will be with Him there too.

How are passions cured? Fighting passions is much more difficult than fighting ordinary sins. A chronic, advanced disease is more difficult to overcome.

First, What someone obsessed with passion needs to do is to realize that he is seriously ill, dependent. It is not he who rules over his vices and bad habits, and they are above him. A person addicted to passion must himself realize that he needs spiritual treatment. Second, what needs to be done is, as St. Theophan the Recluse says, to hate passion, to make a firm decision to fight it. Third— the struggle must begin with prayer to God. Without His help, without constant participation in the Sacraments of Confession and Communion, you cannot control passion only with your own strength. AND fourth What you need to remember: every passion is cured by planting in the soul the virtues opposite to it. For example, gluttony is overcome by abstinence and fasting; the passion of love of money - by cultivating in oneself mercy towards the poor, the needy, and a moderate lifestyle. Anger is treated by avoiding irritation, patience, and cultivating meekness, love, and forgiveness in the soul. And so every passion is opposed by its opposite virtues.

Passion is an extremely strong feeling that arises at the level of intuition. It is expressed as a passion, craving or inclination towards something or someone. The objects of passion are both people and objects, ideas and even thoughts. About how passion manifests itself, what form it takes in a given situation, and how to recognize it in modern world, and will be discussed below.

What is passion: psychologists answer

Psychologists and philosophers of our time characterize passion as a strong emotional outburst that takes precedence over a person’s mind, actions and other feelings. True, they are convinced that passion is a neutral feeling, and only the person experiencing it is able to give this feeling a positive or negative emotional connotation.

The fact is that a person gripped by passion immediately experiences a lot of strong emotions - joy, anxiety, anticipation, expectation, and sometimes doubt. These emotions lead to the fact that a person begins to behave in some sense inappropriately, in other words, he commits actions that will seem thoughtless or simply stupid to others. This happens due to the release of hormones in the body: serotonin, endorphin and adrenaline.

As noted earlier, passion most often acts as a destructive feeling. But man is capable of transforming negative energy into a positive one.

So, for example, psychologists recommend that it is in a fit of such emotions that one begins to develop oneself. It is worth doing something that you have long dreamed of, but did not dare to do for one reason or another, for example, start studying foreign language or go traveling. This process can capture all thoughts, shift attention and, ultimately, bring new knowledge and impressions to life. However, a person does not always have enough self-control and strength to independently control his will, initially experiencing passion and craving for something else.

Although the concept of "passion" has several meanings, most people identify it exclusively with sexual arousal towards a partner or even with love (using the term "passionate love").

However, psychologists deny the identification of the concepts of “love” and “passion”, and the majority even oppose them. They are convinced that relationships built on sexual attraction are selfish, unlike love. Each partner, man or woman, pursues his own goal in such a relationship, while using the other.

Passion in these relationships acts like a drug; it grabs a person headlong, but just as quickly lets go. Scientists even set a period for such relationships - no more than two years. They believe that exactly this amount of time in human body saved increased level a certain type of protein - neurotrophins. Over time, it begins to steadily decline, and former feelings, mistaken for love, gradually disappear.

How do you know if a person is passionate?

Nobody wants to be a “toy” in a relationship. But being an “object of passion” is much more honorable, although the outcome for this kind of relationship is still the same. And here the question arises: is it possible to understand from a person whether he is experiencing passion or this is a deeper feeling. Psychologists identify the following signs that are characteristic of people who experience only passion for their partner, which is expressed exclusively in sexual interest:

  1. A person has a greedy interest in the body of the chosen one; manners and other external manifestations are important to him.
  2. Flirting and seduction dominate intimate conversations.
  3. Increased, sometimes pathological jealousy. It manifests itself due to an unbridled desire to possess and control the object of passion.
  4. A person is not inclined to talk about his true feelings; his thoughts are focused only on his own fantasies.
  5. Apart from sexual contacts and having fun, other joint activities are of little interest.

Signs of passion are also determined physically, just don’t rush to draw conclusions based on them. Remember that passion is inherent in everyone, and a person occasionally succumbs to it, since it is inherent in his nature. Another thing is when he systematically experiences strong passion, ceasing to control himself. Physically it will be expressed like this:

  • Cardiopalmus;
  • Frequent movement around the room;
  • Involuntary dilation of the pupils;
  • Frequently being in a state of sexual arousal;
  • Slight hand trembling;

Before entering into a relationship with a new partner, observe his behavior and manners. Even a shallow analysis will help you understand the true motives and make the right decision.

Types of passion

Passion can be classified according to different signs. For example, classification is carried out according to the object to which it is directed.


  • Sexual passion - a description of its signs was disclosed earlier.
  • Passion for a hobby. In this case, other thoughts and feelings fade into the background. Such passion mobilizes a person’s strength and makes him capable of performing actions almost to the limit of physical and mental capabilities. For example, at creative people masterpieces are born or new plans and ideas appear.
  • Passion for thrills. It is typical for people who are into extreme sports or take drugs. In the second case, there is a change in sensitivity nervous system, in which a person is no longer interested in standard pleasures and joys.
  • Passion for work. It turns people with a heightened sense of responsibility and duty into true fans of their craft. As a rule, such passion is accompanied by an unregulated list of responsibilities and irregular working hours.

Pride, greed, fornication, envy, gluttony, anger, despondency - all these are also types of passions, together representing the “seven deadly sins” in Orthodoxy.

Passion in this case is a skill of the soul that has formed in it from repeated repetition of the same sins and has become, as it were, its natural quality - so much so that a person is not able to get rid of passion, even when he realizes that it no longer brings him pleasure, but it causes pain. Actually, the word “passion” in Church Slavonic language This is precisely what suffering means.


And these sins are called mortal because they entail the death of the soul. Unable to stop, the human soul eventually loses contact with God and becomes incapable of experiencing spiritual joy either in a person’s earthly life or in posthumous existence.

Passion is an ambiguous concept. On the one hand, it brings destruction, since it overshadows the human mind and does not allow one to assess the situation soberly, even leading to irreparable consequences. On the other hand, passion motivates people to creativity and action, and gives the strength to implement bold, large-scale projects. It’s even hard to imagine what civilization in the 21st century would be like without craving people to understand the world around them. The ability to channel passion in the right direction leads to development, but the absence of this skill can destroy destinies and lives.

PASSION

PASSION 1.

1. Strong feeling, a hobby created by instinctive impulses. Passions flared up among those arguing. “After all, passion means when a feeling, attraction, attachment or something like that has reached the point where reason ceases to act?” Goncharov . “How long has it been since your people served the shameful passions of their master as playthings?” Nekrasov . “All my life I have been lost in a crowd of people, sometimes I am accessible to their passions.” Tyutchev .

|| why, with inf. and without additional A strong attraction to something, a constant inclination. “In Mavrushka the clever, why did she have a passion for the cake?” Pushkin . “The only thing that upsets me is your miserable passion for the game.” L. Tolstoy . “Tell me, gossip, what is your passion for stealing chickens?” Krylov . “Little by little, his new activity turns into a passion.” Kokorev . “She (the dog) had such a passion: whatever meat she could get her hands on, she would grab it in a minute.” Krylov .

2. Strong, unbridled love with an extreme predominance of sensual, physical attraction. “Phoebus, seeing her, was inflamed with passion for her.” Pushkin . “The science of tender passion, which Nazon sang.” Pushkin . “You give yourself to him with passion.” A.Blok .

4. Fear, horror, something terrible (simple). - I was so upset that I guess. “Passion, and that’s all! Breaks dishes." A. Ostrovsky . “Passion was told about these places: Ataman Yesmen Sokol defeated travelers.” A.N. Tolstoy .

❖ To the point of passion (simple) - extremely, very much. “He loved cards with a passion.” A. Turgenev . “He loves his low-lying land with passion.” Nekrasov .

2.

PASSION 2, adv. (simple). Very, extremely, very. “He passionately wants to run up to the hanging gallery that goes around the whole house.” Goncharov .


Dictionary Ushakova. D.N. Ushakov. 1935-1940.


Synonyms:

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23-10-2012, 13:21

Description

- this is ardent devotion or ardent affection for a person of the opposite sex, love feeling, a strong focus of the mind, emotions, feelings on a desired object or life goal; an energetic, intense, or excited impulse tending towards physical attraction. This word has many meanings and shades. Sexual passion is so connected with love that it is often called love. Erotic passion- these are burning coals under the heel of love.

Passion can exist without love, love can exist without passion. In the first case, there is no tenderness and feeling, there is only an egoistic desire for pleasure and satisfaction. In the second case, there is no warmth and ardor, which usually accompany full-blooded love between the sexes. Elementary biological urges in men, which we combine with the term “passion,” have technical term“estrus” (estrus period in animals, spawning in fish). Man calls it sexual excitement, frenzy, even passion. Zoologists define estrus as “a special period of sexual desire in the female.” The same applies to males. For most animal species, estrus, which occurs during ovulation, is the only time the female responds to the male. The emotional storm that culminates in orgasm is a phenomenon whose roots go deep into the mechanism of the body; The endocrine glands and the entire autonomic nervous system are actively involved here.

In animals, estrus is a periodic condition and occurs due to hormones secreted by the ovaries and the corresponding endocrine glands. Artificial estrus can be induced by injection of glandular extract, but this does not lead to ovulation.

Our knowledge about the phenomenon of estrus is very limited. One could say that the period of estrus (irresistible desire) in females depends on the release of the hormone “estrus” by the ovaries. But the functioning of this hormone is still inexplicable. Why does it stand out in some periods and not others? What sometimes disrupts the normal estrus rhythm? What is suppressing it? From which external factors does it depend?

Generally speaking, oestrus behavior does not occur among human beings. Passion can be aroused in a person almost at any time and by various influences. Or it is almost impossible to call. And while in the lower female mammals sexual desire is limited to periods of estrus, in women it can be induced in many ways at almost any time. With the help of many techniques and mental associations, you can activate the release of the hormone “estrus”.

Sexual desire is a natural trait of normal adult men and women. It is as beautiful and innocent as breathing or the beating of a heart. In some cases, sexual activity does not awaken until the person actually begins sexual activity. Those who think sex is obscene are only deceiving themselves.

Observations show that passion can eliminate sexual perversions that existed before its appearance. Strong emotions often stop corrupting intemperance in promiscuous sexual contacts. For one who loves, there is only one beloved. For many, the cleansing power of a new feeling resolves all emotional problems. Those who seek to get rid of passion or reduce its manifestations are wrong. Weak sexual passion will lead to the cessation of any kind of living beings. Females prefer a passionate male to a passive and indifferent one. This can be attributed to most women, who rarely prefer a partner who is not passionate enough. Passion, of course, has to do with biological usefulness, health and integrity of the body.

In bees, butterflies, and among other forms of life, when sexual desire arises only once in life, especially in young animals, the highest manifestation of the sexual instinct, completely unpracticed before the act of copulation, can be realized, it must be assumed, only when intercourse is practically forced.

If there were no sexual instinct, humanity could not reproduce, there would be neither procreation nor raising children. The existence of instinct serves a wise purpose. Although the sexual desire seems to become less and less urgent as we climb the evolutionary ladder of life, except in pathological cases; Passion is never forced in a person, but it is always controlled. However, such an important biological need cannot be rejected, because this threatens retribution. It's one thing to expose passion reasonable control, but it’s quite another to refuse her in all manifestations.

Physiological differences between men and women suggest certain psychological differences between them. In most cases, a man is more easily aroused in sexually and strives for immediate satisfaction of her desire; a woman, as a rule, is not so easily aroused and is less ready to immediately rush to satisfy her sexual desire. Every day a man is excited for various reasons thousands of times, although this activity is not felt in his mind and manifests itself as sexual desire only at the end of the working day, after returning home. Travel often causes sexual arousal in those unaccustomed to travel; however, travel can also have the opposite effect. Mental, emotional, physical and nutritional influences influence the sexual impulse, suppressing or exciting it.

The nature, level and volume of everyday life experience increase or decrease sexual desire. Frequency of sexual desire, its intensity is the result of certain factors, such as: state of health, illness, separation, stress and so on. Typically, sexual desire is directly dependent on the general condition of the body. There is a noticeable temporary increase in sexual desire when husband and wife are separated for several days or weeks. Although in society, at least in civilized society, men are, as a rule, more passionate than women, and much more easily excitable; it happens that a woman is as passionate as she is average man, and sometimes even surpasses it. But women are usually more capable of suppressing passion than men.

A woman's body can be aroused against her wishes. A selfish man, possessed of a strong sexual desire, skilled in his physical approaches, may, due to his inability to appreciate the emotional and mental needs of his wife, make married life extremely unhappy. Coitus should be a sensual encounter, not just a physical act.

A person has sexuality and must be its master if he does not want it to be the master. It is known that sexual tension can be increased by appropriate fantasy or tactile stimulation to such an extent that the irresistibility of sexual desire is felt as an uncompromising reality. With sufficient excitement-compulsion, it can indeed become irresistible, because, being involved in the storms of passion, it is difficult to overcome and control it. One who thus excites his sexual self and brings himself to a state of high tension demanding an outcome often becomes a prisoner of his sexual passion, which seems to be out of control, and does not take into account that his own previous actions gave it all move.

Men are most often guilty of allowing passion to develop without courtship; and even where an unprejudiced observer would consider a woman main reason unrest, sooner or later the blame nevertheless falls on the man. Perhaps the woman was innocently the dynamite that destroyed his self-control. Loved ones and wives are often guilty of creating urgent desires in their lovers and husbands, refusing to satisfy them. They do this using subtle, sophisticated erotic techniques that allow women to achieve maximum foreplay pleasure without losing control of the situation. There are women who practice pleasant erotic stimulation - caresses and tenderness, but refuse to bring them to a natural climax. They are perverted, although they don't like to admit it.

Although, as many argue, sexual passion is the most insurmountable, it is often restrained and obstructed. Of all the passions, it is the most difficult for it to be given free, normal expression. And we know that at moments of highest sexual arousal, the power of personal independence of a person is almost completely lost. This moment of supreme satisfaction is comparable to intoxication. However, many men and women exaggerate the role sexual pleasure in life and practice a real religion of pleasure. The thirst for pleasure is cornerstone their sense of self-esteem, and they seize the opportunity for any pleasure, no matter what the cost to their own and others’ health. Such people tend to regard the deprivation of pleasure as a personal insult and demand the highest pleasures as if it were their sacred right.

To justify unbridled sexual behavior that offends the common sense and social feelings of others, such pleasure seekers profess a belief in the superiority of instincts over other manifestations of human nature.

The belief in the irresistibility of sexual desire, requiring immediate gratification, is only a conscious camouflage for irresponsible and, therefore, immoral sexual actions.

A cowardly person, aware of his inability to solve some life problems, is often inclined to consider himself a victim of passion. His (or her) sex life seems to consist of various casual relationships, or masturbation, or both. Purely sexual union often lacks the feeling of love; it is an act of rapid (as in rape) possession, which is often followed by disgust towards the partner. It's even possible sexual union with a partner who, in other types of communication - spiritual, psychological, intellectual - causes complete rejection. However, this does not prove the irresistibility of the feeling of passion, although it can be perceived as evidence of its non-specificity.

Perverted passions often uncontrollable. Perversion can arise for a number of reasons that are difficult to get to the bottom of. In such cases, lectures at moral theme are depressingly ineffective, because, as G. Lessing noted, “vicious passions pervert the constitution of the mind as much as they undermine the constitution of the body... Evil forces lead the victims blindfolded to their altars.” In such cases, hygienic methods are necessary.

The idea that sexual desire creates a fatal drama out of every love affair, the participants of which are supposedly helpless puppets balancing on the wire of irresistible passion, contradicts real situation of things. However, this idea may have noticeable influence on inexperienced youth if they perceive it without critical evaluation. This fundamentally false idea is dangerously cultivated by men and women who seek excuses for their irresponsible sexual behavior.

We are responsible for the expression of our passions, and we should think carefully about the consequences before giving way to passions. A person’s responsibility does not end with the emergence of passion; on the contrary, it is at this moment that the need for responsibility is greatest. It is not the one who has not been subjected to temptation who is righteous, but the one who knows how to overcome this temptation.

The undesirable possibility for a woman to become pregnant is a test of a man’s responsibility in sexual relations. Only a selfish, pleasure-hungry partner will allow himself to ignore the consequences of sexual intercourse at the moment of sexual embrace. In these relationships, men's responsibility is necessary, otherwise chaos is inevitable.

The man who controls his passions (but is not the one who renounces them), restrains every impulse, curbs his energy and masters fleeting desire, prepares himself for that terrible explosion of his emotions and passions, thanks to which he hopes one day to break through beyond oneself, beyond that which is accidental and disintegrating, to the full manifestation of one's powers in true union with the other.

None special effort no need to do anything to suppress natural passion; it just needs to be controlled in the best interests of the individual and society. The theological and dogmatic idea that sexual instincts and desires are evil and should be removed from human life, applies great harm. An attempt to eliminate the flowering of passion will lead to a decrease in the standard of living, which will result in organized prostitution. Complete satisfaction of the feeling of passion is achieved only in a full and genuine union of the two. Efforts to banish natural desires will only lead to their return in the form of excessive obsessions, actions and even perverse tendencies.

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