Diplomacy in communication. What does it mean to be a skilled diplomat?

Diplomacy is the art of saying “good dog”

until you find the right cobblestone.

People's observations

Diplomacy as a personality quality - the ability to bypass sharp corners, avoid problematic and conflict situations, show flexibility, but move towards the intended goal in communication or negotiations.

Mr. Kissinger! What is “shuttle diplomacy”? - ABOUT! This universal method! Let me explain with an example. You want to use shuttle diplomacy to marry Rockefeller’s daughter to simple guy from a Russian village. - This is impossible! How? - Very simple. I go to a Russian village, find a simple guy there and ask: “Do you want to marry an American?” He: “We have plenty of our own girls.” Me: “Yes. But she's the daughter of a billionaire." It! This changes things." Then I'm going to Switzerland for a meeting of the bank's board of directors. I ask: “Do you want to have a vigorous Siberian man as president?” “Ugh,” they say at the bank. - What if he is Rockefeller’s son-in-law? - ABOUT! This makes a difference! I'm going to Rockefeller. I ask: “Do you want to have a Russian man as a son-in-law?” He: “In our family, everyone is a financier!” Me: “And he’s just the president of the Swiss Bank!” It! This makes a difference! Susie! Come here. Mr. Kissinger has found you a groom. This is the President of the Swiss Bank! Susie: “These financiers are all dead!” Me: “Yes! But this one is a vigorous Siberian man.”

Diplomacy is the ability to achieve your goals through subtle and skillful handling of people. There are many techniques and methods in the arsenal of diplomacy: streamlinedness, evasiveness of statements, statements, assessments, promises, caution and prudence in the selection of expressions. A diplomatic person realizes his intentions without insulting or humiliating another, politely and correctly, tactfully and delicately, evasively and painlessly for others, he turns the situation in his favor. He is characterized by wisdom and special flexibility, based on knowledge of the emotional and intellectual nature of man.

Diplomacy is a sign of a mature, highly developed personality. By continuously developing self-control and self-control, patience and tolerance, expanding your knowledge in the field of psychology and analyzing your own and others’ everyday mistakes, diplomacy becomes a master of interpersonal communication. She is able to put the most unpleasant thought into an acceptable form that will not hurt another’s pride and will cause minimal grief.

One eastern ruler saw horrible dream as if all his teeth had fallen out one by one. In great excitement, he called the dream interpreter to him. He listened to him with concern and said: “Lord, I must tell you sad news.” You will lose all your loved ones one by one. These words aroused the anger of the ruler. He ordered the unfortunate man to be thrown into prison and to call another interpreter, who, after listening to the dream, said: “I am happy to tell you the good news - you will outlive all your relatives.” The ruler was delighted and generously rewarded him for this prediction. The courtiers were very surprised. - After all, you told him the same thing as your poor predecessor, so why was he punished and you rewarded? - they asked. To which came the answer: “We both interpreted the dream in the same way.” But it all depends not on what to say, but how to say it.

In the context of diplomacy at the Potsdam Conference. A curious episode occurred. Writer Nikolai Starikov says: The power of the West is based on the superiority of the British and American fleets. It was so before, and it is so now. It is no coincidence that the “democrats” who came to power in the USSR quickly began cutting down the fleet. And sawing in the literal sense - sawing up the newest ships, destroying the newest submarines. The series of Soviet aircraft-carrying cruisers, which they were preparing to launch at the very end, was immediately stopped Soviet period. In short, no one except the Anglo-Saxons should have a fleet. Here iron rule their policies. And at the conference the question arose of what to do with the German fleet. It would be logical to divide it, right? But then the USSR will receive an increase in its naval power. And now British Prime Minister Churchill takes the floor. He speaks beautifully and convincingly. The meaning of his speech is this: the German fleet must be sunk. Stalin sits nearby and, smiling, looks at Churchill. With all his appearance, Stalin shows agreement with the British Prime Minister. He doesn't really applaud. Churchill diverges even more, even more eloquently - the meaning is still the same. We need to sink the fleet! The speech is over. Stalin takes the floor. And he says that he completely agrees with Sir Winston. The German fleet really needs to be sunk. Therefore, the USSR welcomes that Great Britain will do this with its part of the captured fleet. Well, the Soviet Union would like to get its share of German ships and then decide what to do with them. Silent scene. As a result, Churchill had to concede on this issue as well. It was decided to divide equally between the USSR, England and the USA all German surface assets. Navy, including ships under construction and repair. Germany's submarines were mostly sunk - as a kind of compromise. After all, “shipping” England and the United States were most afraid of the submarine fleet.

At the Yalta conference the question of Poland arose. There was no reciprocity. Great Britain tried its best to extend its influence to Poland. Then Stalin stood up from the table, although until now he always (!) spoke sitting at the conference, and explained the position of the USSR: “Mr. Churchill just said that the question of Poland is a matter of honor for the British government. I understand this. For my part, however, I must say that for the Russians the question of Poland is not only a question of honor, but also a question of security. A matter of honor because the Russians had many sins against Poland in the past. The Soviet government seeks to atone for these sins. It is a security issue because the most important strategic problems of the Soviet state are connected with Poland. The point is not only that Poland is a country bordering us. This, of course, matters, but the problem goes much deeper. Throughout history, Poland has always been a corridor through which the enemy attacked Russia. It is enough to remember at least the last thirty years: during this period, the Germans passed through Poland twice to attack our country. Why have enemies still passed through Poland so easily? First of all, because Poland is weak. The Polish corridor cannot be closed mechanically from the outside only by Russian forces. It can only be securely closed from the inside using Poland's own forces. For this, Poland needs to be strong. That is why the Soviet Union is interested in creating a powerful, free and independent Poland. The question of Poland is a matter of life and death for the Soviet state...” The longer Stalin spoke, the more tense the silence became. round table, the gloomier the faces of Roosevelt and Churchill became...

Diplomacy is not all about evasiveness, avoidance and compromise. When necessary, it is a firm, unshakable position. During the war, a very unpleasant story happened to Khrushchev’s son. And since Stalin approached everyone, including his children, with the same standard, he did not make an exception for Khrushchev’s son. Here’s how Vyacheslav Molotov talks about it: – Khrushchev was an opponent of Stalin at heart. Stalin is everything and everyone, but in his soul it’s different. Personal anger pushes him to take any steps. Anger at Stalin because his son found himself in such a situation that he was actually shot. After such embitterment, he will do anything to dirty Stalin’s name. – Nikita abandoned his son, right? - Yes... - His son was like a traitor. This also speaks volumes about him. Good political figure, who even has a son and that...

Major General M. S. Dokuchaev, Hero Soviet Union, former deputy head of the 9th Directorate of the KGB of the USSR (the famous “nine” responsible for ensuring the security of senior government leaders of the USSR), spoke about what happened. This story was cited in his book “Father’s Revenge” by N. A. Zenkovich. At the beginning of March 1943, Stalin received a call from the front from Lieutenant General Khrushchev, who was then a member of the Military Council of the Southwestern Front. Requested a personal meeting. Stalin agreed. ABOUT

What Khrushchev was going to say was clear in advance. His son Leonid shot the major in a drunken state. According to martial law, this crime was punishable by execution. At the same time, Khrushchev’s son had previously “dabbled” with weapons, and then Stalin agreed to Nikita Sergeevich’s request and the case against Leonid was dropped. He was given the opportunity to fight honestly for his homeland.

And now, in the end, he has now committed murder. Khrushchev, practically with tears in his eyes, asked Stalin to severely punish his son, but not to shoot him. Joseph Vissarionovich responded like this: I was informed about what happened to your son. I had no doubt that we would have a meeting and talk about your son. Only out of great respect for you, Comrade Khrushchev, did I allow you to come from the front to Moscow. I would really like to help you, Nikita Sergeevich, but I am powerless to do this. One day I sacrificed my conscience, met you halfway and asked the court to pardon your son. But he did not reform and committed another, similar to the first, serious crime. My conscience and the grief of the people who became victims of your son’s criminal actions do not allow me to break the laws a second time. In the current situation I can’t help you in any way. Your son will be tried in accordance with Soviet laws. Major General M. S. Dokuchaev, to whose testimony N. A. Zenkovich refers, claims that Khrushchev fell to his knees, sobbed and begged Stalin to save his son. Stalin called the guards and asked them to help Comrade Khrushchev come to his senses...

Petr Kovalev 2013

Key words: influence, business conversation, diplomacy, gestures, manipulation, facial expressions, communication, negotiations, body movement.

Key words: influence, diplomacy, gesture, manipulation, facial personal contact, negotiations, talks, motion.

This work examines the psychological aspects of a diplomat’s communicative activity, in particular non-verbal techniques, the most common gestures, special attention is paid to the so-called neurolinguistic programming, or in other words, the basics of effective communication between people.

This paper discusses the psychological aspects of communication activities to the diplomat, in particular non-verbal techniques, the most common gestures, special attention is paid to the so-called neuro-linguistic programming, and in other words, the basics of effective communication between people.

In the Great Soviet Encyclopedia, the word “diplomacy” has the following definition: “The official activities of heads of state, government and special bodies external relations for the implementation of goals and objectives foreign policy states, as well as to protect the interests of the state abroad. Serves the interests of the ruling classes. In the literature, it is often customary to define diplomacy as “the science of foreign relations”, as “the art of negotiations.”

Quoting Big Legal Dictionary, this is “One of the ways to implement the state’s foreign policy.” For successful diplomatic activities, it is necessary to have a good knowledge of international relations and the state of affairs in each country.

“The task of diplomacy is to maintain communication between two sovereign states through negotiations,” writes famous author works on diplomacy by Englishman Harold Nicholson, British diplomat and historian. In 1939 he published Diplomacy, now considered classic work of such kind. Nicholson noted that despite the fact that diplomats communicate using a certain generally accepted international code (special phrases, expressions and words), nevertheless, even they are not immune from the fact that foreign colleagues will misunderstand them.

The role of human communicative activity in modern world it is difficult to overestimate, especially when talking about diplomacy. Speech takes special position in the hierarchy mental processes, thanks to which it acts as the main means of communication, an instrument of thinking and is part of human culture.

Communication is a multifaceted process of developing contacts between people, generated by needs joint activities. Communication includes the exchange of information between its participants, which can be characterized as the communicative side of communication.

The art of communication is the most important skill. To become a master of communication, you need to develop a wide variety of skills: oratory skills, the ability to manage conflict, negotiation skills, adjusting to your interlocutor, mastery of facial expressions, voice and gestures.

The art of communication occupies a special place in the life of a diplomat. A diplomat must be able to communicate with different segments of the population correctly and competently. The ability to speak a language is one of the main tools of a diplomat.

For a diplomat involved in negotiations, the work begins long before he meets his opponent. First of all, it is necessary to study the problem to be discussed. General rule It's simple here - the more you know, the better. Even in ancient times, it was believed that a good diplomat should be versatile educated person. Aristotle in his “Rhetoric” gives a long list of sciences that a future diplomat must master before he dares to show himself in the field of foreign policy. Ancient Greek diplomats had to understand not only current political problems, but at the same time master geography, history, economics, military affairs and be good speakers. However, there are exceptions to this rule. When a diplomat is involved in a complex negotiation process for a long time, he may become too involved in the details and lose sight of the perspective.

Negotiations are, in essence, the basis of diplomacy and the ability to negotiate is “aerobatics” in the diplomatic profession. This is far from a simple matter. Diplomatic negotiations have a number of features that make them significantly different from, say, business negotiations and even domestic political negotiations.

First of all, a diplomat, when building his negotiating position, proceeds from the concept of “national interest.” This means that his position must be supra-party and not depend on ideological and other interests.

During negotiations, all means of putting pressure on the enemy are usually used. Participants begin by stating their initial positions, which often include exaggerated demands, and often do this in the form of an ultimatum. During negotiations between rivals, in order to cause confusion for the enemy, the parties often put forward additional demands at moments when all the main parameters of the future agreement seem to have already been agreed upon. Very often, linking objectively unrelated or weakly related issues is used. Negotiations between rivals are usually accompanied by a propaganda campaign in the form of mass media, designed to put even greater pressure on the enemy.

Participation in negotiations of this type is associated with great psychological stress. It is important to refrain from emotional reactions, which is what the enemy often counts on. It is also important not to reject his proposals out of hand, but to try to find positive elements in them and rephrase them so that an acceptable formulation is obtained. Even in the most heated atmosphere, it is advisable to say “yes” with reservations more often than an unambiguous “no”.

Psychological preparation for a business conversation and the mood for a partner is very important, but not decisive. The result depends on preparedness, but is determined by how the conversation itself is structured. In order to avoid making obvious mistakes in constructing a conversation, psychologists suggest using the following basic principles.

1. Rationality. During the conversation, it is necessary to behave with restraint, even if the partner shows emotions. Why? Firstly, uncontrolled emotions always have a negative impact on the decision. Secondly, there is psychological rule, which reads: “In a discussion, the one who is calmest wins.” Calmness and rationality are the best response to a surge of emotions on the part of a partner.

2. Understanding. You must try to understand your interlocutor. After all, he is trying to explain his position, convey his opinion to his interlocutor, but due to inattention to his point of view, he cannot achieve his goal. And this causes irritation and threatens mutual misunderstanding of positions. Before influencing the position of a communication partner, you should understand it.

3. Attention. It has been established that during a conversation the level of concentration of attention fluctuates. And this happens even when there are no distractions. Concentration and attention throughout the conversation are not the same. The human psyche is designed in such a way that in the process of obtaining information, it requires breaks from time to time. At these moments, attention involuntarily dissipates, and the interlocutor seems to “fall out” for several minutes, disconnected from the conversation. At such moments, you should verbally or non-verbally attract his attention and restore broken contact. The best way to do this, ask the question: “Are you listening to me?”

4. Credibility. In a conversation, you should not give false information, even when the interlocutor does so. Otherwise, a tactical one may turn into a strategic defeat.

5. Demarcation. Establishing a boundary between the interlocutor and the subject of conversation is a very important psychological principle. In the process of communication, we often identify what our partner says with him or even with our attitude towards him. Pleasant information conveyed by an unpleasant interlocutor loses half of its appeal. Our personal attitude towards a person whom we dislike often makes it difficult to objectively assess the information conveyed to him. To avoid this, you should pay attention, first of all, to what exactly is being communicated, and not to what and how it is being communicated.

As with any other technology, there are a huge number of techniques in NLP.

1. Rapport. Rapport is quite fragile forms feedback in the process of communication, causing the interlocutor to feel that he is understood and liked. In case of good rapport, the interlocutor develops a feeling of trust in the communicator. In diplomatic activities, the ability to correctly create “rapports” can be very useful, since a diplomat who inspires trust will be able to negotiate more successfully than his colleague who does not inspire trust.

When establishing rapport, it is important to be able to adjust. The adjustment happens:

Adjustment to the pose. When rapport is created, you should first take the same pose as your partner - “mirror” your partner’s pose.

Adjustment to breathing. Options are possible here: adjustment to breathing can be direct or indirect. Direct adjustment - start breathing at the same pace as your partner. Indirect adjustment is coordinating some part of one’s behavior with the partner’s breathing rhythm, for example, swinging one’s hand in time with the partner’s breathing, or speaking in time with his breathing, that is, as he exhales. Direct adjustment is more effective in creating rapport.

Adjustment to movements. It is more complex than previous types of adjustment, because both posture and breathing are something relatively unchanging and constant, which can be considered and copied gradually. Movement is a relatively fast process, in this regard, the communicator will need, firstly, observation, and secondly, you need to think in advance about how the partner will not be able to realize the actions of the communicator.

“Mirroring” must be extremely careful and delicate, otherwise it will cause exactly the opposite reaction. Adjustment is followed by leading, when the communicator, by changing his behavior, causes changes in the partner’s behavior. Primary management It is also a test of how well the rapport is working.

2. Ocular access keys. A person is designed in such a way that while he thinks and speaks, his eyeballs move. Our eyes demonstrate the features of memory and the thinking process, show how a person gains access to information encoded in our brain. When talking with your interlocutor, you may notice that his eyes are in constant motion.

For a diplomat, it is important not only to be able to correctly interpret views, but also to look after oneself and control oneself.

Looking up and to the left: visual memory. These are images of the past stored in visual memory. This also includes dreams, constructed images that have already been “seen” before.

Looking up and to the right: constructing visual images. As a rule, here a person constructs images that he has not seen.

Looking horizontally to the left: auditory memory. Memorized sounds (speech sounds, melodies, often phone numbers, memorized poems without focusing on the meaning - rhythmic memorization).

Gaze horizontally to the right: auditory construction. Usually this is constructed speech or the construction of sounds with a new timbre, rhythm, pitch, etc.

Looking down to the left: internal dialogue. Internal dialogue is a commentary on experience. Internal dialogue can be a tool for rational logical thinking.

Looking down to the right: feelings. At this point, a person can access emotions and kinesthetic experiences. A characteristic posture for people who are depressed: head down, “drooping” appearance, looking down to the right (or down to the left).

Unfocused eyes: a person is in at least two systems. For example, he hears and sees, sees and feels, and perhaps all together. This state is called a light trance with altered consciousness.

3. Breaking the pattern. Many of our actions are carried out according to a certain program, repeated hundreds and thousands of times without changes: greeting, shaking hands, smoking. When acquaintances meet and ask: “How are you?”, they are not really interested in the state of affairs - they simply act according to a program called “greeting” and which provides a template answer: “Fine” to a template question.

You can ask: “How are you?” answer: “It’s terrible, I’ll die soon”; or start talking in detail about your affairs: “Well, just imagine, yesterday in the metro on Vasileostrovskaya everyone’s feet were trampled, but today I didn’t hear the alarm clock, overslept, and was late for the lecture. I actually wanted to go to bed early, but it didn’t work out: first I was watching TV with my neighbors, and then I remembered that I still had a lot of things to do...” This behavior does not correspond to the generally accepted program and causes confusion in the partner. And this situation of confusion can be taken advantage of - if old program behavior, the partner’s old pattern is broken, it is possible to impose on him new program.

This is a very good and effective technique, but it should be used in diplomatic practice with extreme caution, because it is necessary to comply with strict diplomatic protocol, violation of which is fraught with serious consequences not only for the image of a particular diplomat, but also for international relations

These basic aspects of body language will help a diplomat make a good impression on others.

Face. The face should be lively, more smiles, but in moderation. It is necessary to take care of your teeth to be able to sparkle them.

Gestures. Gestures should be expressive, but also in moderation. During gestures, you should not spread your fingers, and your hands should be kept below chin level, without crossing your arms and legs.

Head movements. You should nod more often, confirming what the interlocutor has said, and while listening, tilt your head to the side. Keep your chin raised.

Eye contact. Eye contact should not cause feelings of awkwardness or discomfort. If national traditions are not prohibited from looking directly into the eyes of the interlocutor, then those who look directly gain more trust than those who prefer to look to the side.

Posture. While listening, you should lean forward. When speaking, stand straight.

Territory. You should stand at a comfortable distance from the interlocutor. If the interlocutor retreats, you should not approach him.

Specularity. Having mirroring skills, you can quietly copy the language signals and body movements of your interlocutors.

The psychological and political qualities of a diplomat are manifested in his activity, behavior, work and diplomatic activities. Diplomacy is a professional work activity and, moreover, a scientific and practical activity. To the same extent, it is the same scientific discipline as physics, mathematics, biology, only its subject is power, the “psychological-practical field of power,” no less natural than the gravitational or magnetic field.

The choice of means of influencing people's states and the application of management methods to them presuppose exceptionally high characteristics for the diplomat himself - possession of developed self-control, self-regulation, self-government and self-education, knowledge in the field of practical psychology.

Choosing between means of influence, a diplomat takes risks like no other labor activity. Only success and victory free him from responsibility. In case of defeat, he will face either the end of his career (political death), condemnation or terror (physical death), a ban on his profession (professional death), discredit in the media and historical literature(moral death). The choice of funds is difficult psychological experiences, with exceptionally difficult decisions.

The main problems that I had to face during the preparation of this work are the lack of a sufficient amount of literature devoted to the psychological aspects of communicative activity specifically in diplomacy.

11. Big Soviet Encyclopedia[Electronic resource] URL: http://bse.sci-lib.com (access date: 10/21/2010).

12. Gorin S. A. Have you tried hypnosis (transcripts of seminars). M., Lan, 1995. – 208 p.

14. Peke A. Discourse on the art of negotiations / trans. from fr. L. Sifurova. – M.: Scientific book, 2004. – 192 p.

15. Popov V. Modern diplomacy: theory and practice. Diplomacy - science and art: Course of lectures / V. Belov. – M: International. relations, Yurayt-Izdat, 2006. – 575 p.

16. Rytchenko T.A., Tatarkova N.V. Psychology business relations. –M.: MGUESI, 2001. – 91 p.

Choose your words carefully. Even with the best intentions, your words can offend people. Before talking about a sensitive topic, think about whether the words you want to say are truthful, helpful and kind. Speak in the first person to express your own feelings rather than assume other people's thoughts and feelings.

• So, you can say: “I am unhappy with the decision that was made at the meeting,” instead of: “You must be upset about this decision.”
• All statements must express your point of view and view of the situation.
• There is no need to defend yourself and blame others.
• If you need to discuss a serious issue, think about the appropriate words in advance.

The style of speech should be appropriate to the situation. Assess who you are dealing with so that people understand your words correctly. Choose the appropriate method like email and personal conversation. Some news is best communicated to the whole team, and some one-on-one.

• For example, it is necessary to inform staff about budget cuts. Previously you reported important information through Email, but this method led to confusion. In this case, it is better to hold a meeting and report the news, and then answer questions.
• If necessary, schedule individual meetings.