How to find peace of mind and not lose yourself. Human mental balance

Unfortunately, few people can calmly react when they are shouted at, humiliated, rude, when money is lost or a loved one leaves. All people face problems, and only in rare moments can you feel the joy of your life. But happiness, as they say, lives inside each individual. And not everyone can protect themselves from problems and insure their lives like a car. This means that you yourself need to become spiritually happy in order to feel the joy of being.

But how can you feel happiness when you are surrounded by numerous problems? No way. And here it is necessary to be a mentally balanced person in order to calmly relate to any troubles in life and keep joy inside oneself.

How to find peace of mind?

Need to stop playing and pretending

It is difficult for a person to be spiritually relaxed and happy just because he himself begins to be insincere, a pretender, a deceiver. Most people deceive even themselves, which becomes clear only when a person realizes that he wanted something completely different, and not what he received. People play some roles: leaving the house, each of you is no longer what he is when he is left alone with himself. You try to smile when you want to cry, maintain a good-natured relationship with colleagues when in fact they annoy you. All these games and pretense simply take away mental strength and unbalance.

You need to do something not because others want it,
but because you yourself wished it

Mental balance is lost when a person begins to live and act at the behest of other people. He no longer listens to himself, he listens to what other people tell him. And how can you be calm and balanced in such a situation, even if sometimes you don’t understand why you should do what you don’t want to do? You are used to living in accordance with the desires of the people around you, but you forgot about your own. How, then, can you talk about peace of mind if you do not even listen and do not turn to yourself?

You need to know and love yourself

You need to communicate with yourself alone more often, understand the motives of your desires and actions. Then such knowledge will lead you to self-confidence, stability. And this will not be due to whether you have large sums of money and a luxurious house, but to the fact that you understand yourself. You know what drives you, what you really want, and you love and accept everything that is connected with you. You do not condemn yourself, do not criticize, but calmly treat even what could previously cause hostility. Because this is you, which is, which has its own advantages and disadvantages.

From self-acceptance begins to develop peace of mind. You no longer judge yourself, but simply accept with those negative and positive qualities that you have. Each person has his own shortcomings, but you have the right to learn to treat your negative qualities positively.

Prayer is rest for the soul

A wonderful vacation for a person, my dears, is to devote even a little time in your life. If, after an exhausting day, a little time is devoted to it and a person frees himself to partake of the Spirit of God, the Holy Spirit, which is in the Church, generous and abundant, then he will really fully rest. After all, rest is not when we sleep for a long time or make different trips. And this is also, of course, rest for the body. But rest for the soul, spiritual rest, is much more important and significant. A person truly rests when he learns a living connection with God.

I say this because everyone notices how wonderful peace the human spirit finds during the holy services of the Church (as was the case at the prayer canon to the Most Holy Theotokos, which we sang together). To what extent these sacred troparia, composed by saints who had the experience of knowing the Holy Spirit and the presence of God in their hearts and expressed precisely this experience in church music, troparia, and hymns, help the human spirit to ascend to God and partake of the Holy Spirit. The Lord will give it to those who seek and thirst for Him. All this gives us a true sense of the presence of God, rest, a true sense, so to speak, of amusement and entertainment. I am absolutely sure that from one real, from one service, from one sacred rite in the temple space, you will rest in such a way that it is impossible to rest in the best entertainment centers where people go - they leave them even more tired than they came, more nervous . Sometimes they are so excited that one kills the other.

And it is strange to hear when someone says: well, today, when you can spend nights in entertainment centers, people should be calm, joyful, smiling every day. Yes, they just get out of bed, press the button, turn on the radio, noise and din begin, let's sing along, and so in the morning, as soon as they wake up, they are already on edge! Sometimes, before dawn, we go down by car from the monastery and see how, at the slightest provocation, they scream, bully each other, swear, and are about to fight. And you ask yourself: what happened to them? after all, it’s only morning… well, after all, it would be evening… And it was early morning, seven o’clock, they hadn’t opened their eyes yet, but they were already on their nerves. Where were they? They may have spent the entire night at the entertainment venues they left after spending money, so they returned home in even worse condition than they were the day before!

A man enters, an angel leaves

This does not happen in the Church. “, - says St. John Chrysostom in a beautiful word, - ... do you want to know what the Church is and what is her miracle? It's very simple. Look around you or go into a church and you will see that the church is the place where the wolf comes in and the lamb comes out. You enter the church as a wolf and you leave as a lamb. You enter as a thief, but you go out as a saint, you go in angry, but you go out meek, you go in as a sinner, but you go out spiritual, you go in as a man, but you go out as an angel.” And he corrects himself: “What am I saying: an angel?! Is it just an angel? You enter as a man and exit as a god by grace!” That's what the Church is.

Indeed, this is an indisputable fact: a person in the church space, in an atmosphere of chants and prayers, finds serene peace. Because, as you know, there are great services in the Orthodox Church, and it is, first of all, liturgical, and the entire “therapeutic course” with which it affects a person, the souls of people, is a course of treatment through worship. I remember how people came to the Holy Mountain (and in general I noticed this throughout my entire monastic life) to live in the monastery. How wild they looked! Their faces reflected their inner savagery - a wild disposition, a wild look ... After they spent a day or two on the Holy Mountain, in a monastery, attended services, the sweetness and meekness of God's grace loomed slowly on their faces. And despite the fact that they were just pilgrims, the Spirit of God still influenced them, they calmed down and gained true peace.

And many said: we are going to the Holy Mountain, to the monastery, and even if we don’t get much benefit, then at least we’ll sleep well, we sleep so well in the monastery, like nowhere else outside its walls, otherwise we can’t rest find or anything else. And not because the monastery is quiet. In the world, too, they had silence. But because there was peace in the monastery, spiritual peace. This contrast was so sharp that it could be seen with the naked eye. Sometimes I played with them (some of them thought that all of us on the Holy Mountain have the gift of clairvoyance and just look at a person, we see through him)! But it could be the saints - and who are we?! And one day, maybe 25 people came. I tell them: “Do you want me to tell you now which of you came for the first time, and who has already been here?” They say, "Yes, Father, tell us." I looked at their faces - and indeed, it was immediately possible to identify those who were on the Holy Mountain not for the first time, they had different faces in comparison with the rest. And I said, "Here you are, you are, you are, you are, you've already been." And he was right, he guessed everything! And so he joined the glory of the seer! (Laugh.) Although he was like those fakirs, who in reality are charlatans!

God is a reliable support in life

Therefore, to learn is the blessing of God! Therefore, you need to learn how to pray, my dears, because in your daily life, whatever one may say, you meet many difficulties and disappointments, many are at an impasse. At least from my short communication with you, I see that you have many hopeless situations, problems, questions, and severe anxiety. And even the darkness that sometimes penetrates a youthful soul, and then a person does not know who he is, or what he does, or where he is going, or what he wants - knows nothing.

All this is cured when a person begins to pray. When a person begins to pray, he receives strength from prayer. there is light, because God Himself is light. And the light of God begins to gradually dissolve the spiritual darkness. And if sometimes darkness persists in a person's soul, this happens because the good God, like a doctor, wants to heal the soul with humility, to teach a person to be humble. And we need to learn how to receive this strength in order to swim across the sea of ​​our life and overcome difficulties, having a reliable support.

The other pillars that exist today: our common sense, our money, our health, our strength, another person, our neighbor, our friend, our girlfriend, our spouse, etc., are pillars that are also good, but they unreliable because they are subject to destruction and change. People change, the world around us changes due to certain events, due to certain circumstances. The only reliable support, unchanging support, is faith in God. God never changes. He does not get lost, does not change, does not disappoint a person, never betrays him. God does not leave His deeds unfinished and half done, but completes them, because God Himself is perfect! So often when you face failures, especially now when you are studying, with failures in exams, in classes, you need to learn this power of prayer in order to be above failures, like an airplane that flies over the clouds during a thunderstorm. He soars up, and he is not afraid of anything; the storm is raging, but it does not reach the height where he flies, because he has "strength" that allows him to overcome such situations.

Wish me bad luck!

And even more so in the Church, God gives strength not only to overcome ours, but also to derive spiritual benefit from these failures. And sometimes failure is the best of luck! Because it has such beneficial effects on the soul of a person, on his personality as a whole, which are often necessary for a person. I can say that it is extremely necessary to learn how to deal with failure. Failure is very important to a person. Everywhere we are wished "good luck", but we need at least sometimes to be wished "good luck", so that we know that we need to prepare for failure, and not get used to the fact that everything should be the way we want it to be. And as soon as the slightest obstacle arises, we run to psychologists and psychiatrists, our head is filled with the fact that we have “psychological problems”. Our head is full of "psychological problems", our pocket is filled with pills, and the psychologist's pocket is full of money. “45 minutes cost 15 lire,” he tells you! You know, some psychologists don't like me because I stole their clients! (Laugh.) When I heard about this, I was surprised myself - the day before yesterday, a psychologist told me about a conversation that took place in his professional circle that some lost clients because of me. But this is really a dramatic situation: a person, drowning in his problems, comes to the doctor, and he looks at his watch. And as soon as 45 minutes are up, he says: “Look (and the poor fellow confesses his life to him), do you want to move on to the second hour? Calculate, otherwise stay in your abyss and come another time!” Despite all this, we often turn to psychologists. Is there a need for this and what exactly? People pay to talk, they pay to be heard. You can imagine what we have come to. That is, in what a difficult situation are people that they go for it! And all because they lost fellowship with God.

Prayer shows the meaning of life

God asks us, urges us, implores us, compels us to talk with Him! Do you see what He says? Ask, seek, knock on the door and it will be opened to you. Whatever you ask, God will give you. And if we learn to pray, then we will acquire peace in our souls. And this peace of mind is the force that does not allow a person to drown. So a person who learns to pray realizes very well what is the meaning of his life. He acquires the meaning of life, and in this sense there is a place for his failures.

Probably, every person wants to always be calm and balanced, and experience only pleasant excitement, but not everyone succeeds. To be honest, only a few people know how to feel this way, and the rest live like “on a swing”: first they rejoice, and then they get upset and worry - unfortunately, people experience the second state much more often.

What is mental balance, and how to learn to be in it all the time, if it doesn’t work out in any way?

What does mental balance mean?

Many people think that peace of mind is a utopia. Is it normal when a person does not experience negative emotions, does not worry about anything and does not worry? Probably, this happens only in a fairy tale, where everyone lives happily ever after. In fact, people forgot that the state peace of mind, harmony and happiness is completely normal, and life is beautiful in various manifestations, and not only when everything turns out “our way”.

As a result, in case of violations or complete absence of emotional health, physical health is seriously affected: not only nervous disorders occur - serious diseases develop. If you lose for a long time peace of mind, you can "earn" peptic ulcer, skin problems, diseases of the heart and blood vessels, and even oncology.

In order to learn to live without negative emotions, you need to understand and realize your goals and desires, without replacing them with anyone's opinions and judgments. People who know how to do this live in harmony with both the mind and the soul: their thoughts do not disagree with words, and words do not disagree with actions. Surrounding such people also understand, and are able to perceive any situation correctly, therefore they are usually respected by everyone - both at work and at home.

How to find and restore peace of mind

So can it be learned? You can learn everything if you have a desire, but many people, complaining about fate and circumstances, do not really want to change anything in life: having got used to the negative, they find in it the only entertainment and a way to communicate - it is no secret that it is negative news that is discussed in many teams with great heat.

If you really want to find peace of mind and perceive the world around you with joy and inspiration, try to consider and use the methods that are described below.

• Stop reacting to situations in the "usual" way, and start asking yourself: How am I creating this situation? That's right: we create any situations that "form" in our lives ourselves, and then we cannot understand what is happening - we need to learn to see the cause-and-effect relationship. Most often, our thoughts work on the negative course of events - after all, the worst expectations are more habitual than the expectation of something good and positive.
• Look for opportunities in any trouble, and try to respond "inappropriately." For example, if your boss “broke off” at you, don’t be upset, but rejoice - at least smile and thank him (for a start, you can mentally) for reflecting your internal problems like a mirror.
• By the way, gratitude is the best way to protect yourself from negativity and return peace of mind. Develop a good habit every evening to thank the Universe (God, Life) for the good things that happened to you during the day. If it seems to you that there was nothing good, remember the simple values ​​\u200b\u200bthat you have - love, family, parents, children, friendship: do not forget that not every person has all this.
• Constantly remind yourself that you are not in past or future problems, but in the present - "here and now." Every person at any moment of time has everything necessary to be free and happy, and this state continues as long as we do not allow past grievances or worst expectations to take possession of our consciousness. Look for the good in every moment of the present - and the future will be even better.
• You should not be offended at all - it is harmful and dangerous: many practicing psychologists note that patients who carry grievances for a long time develop the most serious diseases. Including oncology. It is clear that about peace of mind there is no talk here.
• Sincere laughter helps to forgive insults: if you can’t find something funny in the current situation, cheer yourself up. You can watch a funny movie or a fun concert, turn on fun music, dance or chat with friends. Of course, you should not discuss your grievances with them: it is better to look at yourself from the outside, and laugh at the problems together.
• If you feel like you can't handle "dirty" thoughts, learn to replace them: use short positive affirmations, meditation, or small prayers - for example, try replacing a negative thought with a wish for the whole world. This method is very important: after all, at one moment in time we can keep only one thought in our head, and we ourselves choose “what thoughts to think.”
• Learn to track your condition - be aware of what is happening to you “here and now”, and soberly assess your emotions: if you get angry or offended, try to stop interacting with others, at least for a short time.
• Try to help other people as soon as possible - it brings joy and peace. Only help those who really need it, and not those who want to make you a “hanger” for their problems and grievances.
• A great way to help restore peace of mind is regular exercise. fitness and walks: the brain is saturated with oxygen, and the level of “happy hormones” rises. If something oppresses you, you are anxious and worried, go to a fitness club or gym; if this is not possible, just run or take a walk in the park or at the stadium - wherever you can. Mental balance is hardly possible without physical health, and a person who does not know how to achieve balance cannot become completely healthy - he will always have disorders and diseases.

"Cheerful" posture - the path to peace of mind

Psychologists note that people who monitor their posture are much less prone to stress and anxiety. There is nothing complicated here: try to hunch over, lower your shoulders, head, and breathe heavily - in just a few minutes, life will seem difficult to you, and those around you will begin to annoy you. And, on the contrary, if you straighten your back, raise your head, smile and breathe evenly and calmly, your mood will immediately improve - you can check. Therefore, when you work while sitting, do not stoop and do not “squint” in a chair, keep your elbows on the table, and put your legs next to each other - the habit of throwing your legs over your legs does not contribute to balance. If you are standing or walking, distribute your body weight evenly on both legs, and do not slouch - keep your back straight. Try to consciously keep your posture for several days, and you will notice that there are fewer bad thoughts, and you want to smile more often.

All these methods are very simple, but they only work when we apply them, and not just know about them and continue to think about how we can achieve peace of mind and change our lives for the better.

Do not worry about trifles or things that are ordinary and inevitable.

What is Tranquility

• Calmness is a state of mind in which there are no internal conflicts and contradictions, and external objects are perceived equally balanced.
• Calmness is the ability to maintain clarity of mind and sobriety of mind under any external circumstances.
• Calmness is an expression of sincere trust in life and the world around.
• Calmness is the self-control and strength of a person's character, they help to survive in a non-standard situation and succeed under ordinary circumstances.
• Calmness is the ability to act rationally in any situation, taking into account only logical conclusions, and not an emotional outburst.

How to find and maintain calmness, stop being nervous and worried.

Context: Calm down! Only calmness! It must be preserved in any situation. Another issue is that it doesn't work for everyone. But, thanks to the knowledge of how to remain calm, it is easier to find the right solution, a way out of any situation, and reduce the number of mistakes.

An excited state is one of the most important barriers to a rational decision of affairs. So not for long to lose confidence, strength, to develop various fears and complexes. Everyone knows the fact that calm people attract others. Especially those who calmly, calmly and rationally solve various problem situations, causing admiration and respect of others.

Problem: Be able to restrain yourself under any circumstances. As people say: "Keep yourself in hand ..." Try to be in a state of peace of mind.

Solution: How to find peace of mind after a nervous breakdown. It is even more difficult to avoid a violent manifestation of emotions while internally you are not so calm. In order for a calm state to become your usual, normal state, you need to train. The emotion of calmness itself should automatically turn on in time. This becomes possible if you devote enough time to work on yourself.

How to reach mental balance and calmness

• Quiet place. To get started, follow the link to QUIET PLACE. This will instantly help you relax. Now just remember it every time you want to calm down.
• Vera. A believer is always sure that everything in life - both bad and good - makes sense, and any adversity is a good lesson and an opportunity to learn from your mistakes. Thus, faith gives a person a deep sense of peace.
• Psychological trainings. Inner calmness training can help a person overcome self-doubt and get rid of fears; and as a result, cultivate calmness in yourself.
• Self improvement. The basis of calmness is self-confidence; eliminating complexes and tightness, cultivating self-respect, a person approaches a state of calm.
• Education. Understanding is necessary for peace of mind - in order to understand the nature of things and their interconnection, a person needs education.

Similar traits: restraint, composure
Golden mean: fussiness, panicking, emotional lability, hysteria - a complete lack of inner peace. Indifference, indifference - excessive calmness based on selfishness

I have long noticed that I feel more balanced and confident when I take time to relax, meditate or pray. Quite pleased with the result, I soon stop doing it. Gradually my life becomes more and more tense, I come to despair. Peace is leaving me. Then I resume my relaxing activities, and life gradually improves.

Many people pass through this circle. From this we can conclude: "If you do not have time for relaxation - it is absolutely necessary for you".

To find peace of mind, you need to develop the habit of giving yourself a break every day. People who have achieved peace of mind often perform certain rituals. Some pray, others meditate, others take a walk at dawn. Everyone finds their own way of relaxation. It helps us better understand and attune ourselves.

Peace of mind is a state of harmony with the whole world and, above all, with oneself. But above all, calmness is balance.

The number one challenge for martial artists is to maintain balance. When you start doing karate, you will learn that strength depends on balance and a “cold” head. It is worth adding emotions, and your song is sung. Balance and peace of mind are the sources of our self-confidence. Calm does not mean sleepy! Calm is about managing power, not resisting it.. Calmness is the ability to see the big picture without focusing on the details.

If you want to protect yourself from all adversity, you have chosen the wrong planet. Peace and confidence can only be found within yourself. There is no stability in the surrounding world, everything around is in a state of eternal variability. How can we deal with the unpredictability of life? Just by accepting it! Tell yourself, “I love surprises. It's great when you know that at any moment some kind of surprise can happen. Make a decision: “Whatever happens, I can handle it.” Agree with yourself: “If I get fired, I will find a job with a freer schedule. If I get hit by a bus, I won't be here anymore." This is not a joke. This is the truth of life. The earth is a dangerous place. People are born and die here. But that doesn't mean you have to live like a cowardly rabbit.

Life will remain a struggle if we insist on it. Modern civilization has taught us to constantly strain. We grew up believing in resistance. We tend to push events and push people. We exhaust ourselves, and this does more harm than good.

One young man traveled all over Japan to meet a great martial artist. Having obtained an audience, he asked the Master, “I want to be the best. How long will it take me?"
And the sensei answered: "Ten years."
The student asked, “Master, I am very capable, I will work day and night. How long will it take me?"
And the Master answered: “Twenty years!”

Greetings, desert corner... It cannot be considered a mere coincidence that cultures around the world have a tradition and reverence for solitude. For the period of initiation, both the American Indian and the African Bushman left their tribes, hiding in the mountains or forests in order to understand their destiny. The great spiritual teachers - Christ, Buddha, Mohammed - drew inspiration from solitude, as did millions of their followers. Each of us needs such a treasured place where phones do not ring, where there is no TV or Internet. Let it be a nook in the bedroom, a corner on the balcony or a bench in the park - this is our territory for creativity and reflection.

Since the 17th century, science has been armed with Sir Isaac Newton's method: if you want to understand something, smash it to smithereens and study the pieces. If this does not add clarity, divide into even smaller parts ... In the end, you will get to the bottom of how the Universe works. But is it true? Take Shakespeare's sonnet and divide it into nouns, prepositions and pronouns, then break the words into letters. Will the author's intent become clearer to you? Lay out the "Mona Lisa" on strokes. What will it give you? Science works wonders, but it also dissects. The mind breaks things apart. The heart brings them together. Strength and well-being come when we look at the world as a whole.

Forces of nature. Have you ever noticed that you can wander all day in the forest and feel the influx of strength? Or spend the morning at the mall and feel like you've been run over by a truck? Everything around vibrates, be it grass, concrete, plastic or polyester. We capture her. Gardens and forests have a healing vibration - they restore our energy. The vibration of concrete malls is of a different type: they suck energy. The vibration of cathedrals is directed upwards. In smoky bars and strip clubs, you will leave the lion's share of your vitality.

It doesn't take a genius to understand that our health and worldview depend on the elusive energy of the environment. When we are full of energy, we easily manage to resist illness and the bad mood of others. If the energy is at zero, we attract depression and illness to ourselves.

Why is relaxation needed? Almost everything we do in life is a race for results. But deep relaxation, meditation or prayer helps us to look at life in a new way. We expect that the future will bring us many pleasant moments. However, our attention should still be focused on the present. As we practice deep relaxation, we will begin to notice that some of the qualities acquired during the exercise gradually become habitual and change our daily life. We become calmer, we have intuition.

We all have an inner voice, but it is weak and barely audible. When life gets too hectic and noisy, we stop hearing it. But as soon as we muffle extraneous sounds, everything changes. Our intuition is always with us, but often we do not pay any attention to it.

Relaxation will save you more time than you spend on it.. Make it a habit to tune yourself the way you tune a musical instrument. Twenty minutes every day - so that the strings of your soul sound clean and harmonious. Wake up every morning with the intention of being calm and balanced. Some days you will be able to hold out until the evening, and sometimes only until breakfast. But if maintaining peace of mind becomes the goal, gradually you will learn this, perhaps the most important art in your life.