How to make the right decision when in doubt. What to do if you can't make a decision

All actions are divided into those whose results can be predicted, and those whose consequences can only be assumed. The most difficult choice is one in which there is no way to know whether the outcome will be successful. There are situations in which you need to make a decision in a short time. It is at such moments that a person places his hopes on intuition and his mind, which form the necessary balance for the right choice.

What does decision-making depend on in difficult situations?

Correct decisions in various situations lead to necessary purpose. But personality is constantly evolving. When solving important problems and in difficult circumstances, it undergoes transformations. This means that priorities, goals and the person himself change. Therefore, when making an important decision, you should follow the “here and now” principle, and not look into the future. There are several methods that will help you learn to make the right choices in career and life matters:

1. 1. Getting rid of the “narrow frames”. A common phenomenon when choosing one solution or another. It lies in the fact that the subconscious reduces the multiple variations of possible outcomes to a significant minority. When deciding whether to buy a car, a person sees only two options: “yes” or “no.” However, alternative steps are not considered. For example, you should buy a cheap car or postpone the purchase altogether and leave the money for more necessary things. There is a trade-off between the two solutions that can only be found through proper prioritization.
2. 2. Expanding choice. A person becomes too attached to the goal to which he initially set his thinking, that is, he sees only one solution that is related to this goal, and ignores others. An example is the adoption of purchasing an apartment. If she initially made a good impression, and the realtor offered favorable conditions, then the question arises as to whether it is worth buying this particular home. But the fact is that this is the first apartment that was viewed. Also, when moving to another city, you should not limit your choice to one locality. You need to visit several places first, and then choose the most suitable one. Therefore, there is no need to make hasty decisions; it is worth thoroughly studying the real estate market in order to choose the most suitable one from the best offers. It is always necessary to look for an alternative, to consider possible scenarios that could happen if a completely different decision is made.
3. 3. Information. When choosing, it is worth fully studying the available data. When applying for a job, a person can ask his boss questions in order to understand what position he is applying for, or about the dismissal of a previous employee. You should not limit yourself to one source of information. During an interview, it is permissible to use leading questions. With their help, a certain scheme of actions is built that will positively influence the decision made.
4. 4. Create space for simple solutions. Expanding your choice isn't always helpful. Sometimes because large quantity a person is lost in options and finds it difficult to make final choice. Therefore, the basic priority method is applicable here. Combined with the expansion of options, it can simplify the decision-making task. If, when changing jobs, many interviews were completed and a large number of employers responded, then you need to compare your priorities with the conditions they offer. If there is a match, this will greatly simplify the choice.
5. 5. Test in practice. Any correct solution supported by experience. If you have a choice between two cars, a test drive will come to the rescue. Experience is the basis that is important when resolving controversial issues.
6. 6. Accepting criticism. The latter helps when correct and useful conclusions are drawn from it. A look from the outside helps to complement your own picture of reality, to balance arrogance with someone else’s uncertainty.

There are times when you should not use listed methods. An alternative is determined by the number of advantages and disadvantages, but sometimes the latter are not present. If from decision taken If there are no negative consequences, then you should act immediately. For example, when meeting a girl, a guy will begin to weigh the pros and cons, forgetting that he is lonely and free and wants love.

How to stop thinking bad thoughts about yourself

The right choice in your personal life

In personal life, an excessive desire to have information can lead to quarrels and misunderstandings. The partner will see this as a test or threat to the relationship. But if mutual understanding reigns in the union, then the chosen one will tell everything necessary.

Getting rid of fleeting emotions will help you not regret your choice. Many wrong decisions are made under the influence of momentary feelings. Therefore in difficult situations It’s worth thinking about how you might feel about this issue in 10 minutes or years.

Any choice requires time during which a person thinks about everything and gets rid of the influence of emotions. For example, a wife decided to divorce her husband and go to her lover after he gave her an expensive gift and organized a wonderful evening. But the wife does this under the influence of emotions that remain after the meeting. Therefore, it is worth thinking about what will happen if the husband stays with the child, how this will affect him and whether the lover will always be so romantic. To organize your thoughts and completely calm down, use the following methods:

1. 1. Calm breathing. It is necessary to take 10 measured exhalations and inhalations. This will concentrate attention and cool emotions.
2. 2. "Ideal self." A person imagines the ideal course of events after making a decision. However, maintaining concentration, helping a friend and learning to wait are also necessary.

Knowing your basic priorities can help you always stick to your main goals and objectives. Sometimes, when making a choice, a person forgets about the initial values ​​and is distracted by other options. This often happens in personal relationships. Sometimes it is difficult for a woman to make a choice between two men, although subconsciously she has made it long ago. But thinking about the other guy, his qualities and merits, obscures the image of the already chosen man and pushes him away from the initial choice.

When making a decision, it is easy to fall into the traps of arrogance; they are called “tripwires.” It will seem that everything is fine and good, but later problems may begin. Due to arrogance, a person will not be able to turn back, since he has a strong attachment to the choice. This often happens in relationships. At the first stages, it seems to the girl or guy that this is forever and this choice is the best, and the relationship is idealized. But any connections are not immune from quarrels and crises that lead to separation. Because of blind faith in the choice made, partners often do not notice that they are not suitable for each other. Therefore, you must immediately understand that creating a union is hard work and the ability to find alternative options in solving emerging problems.

The use of these methods will help you make the right decision and give clarity and clarity to the selection procedure. But they require a lot of time, and decisions do not lend themselves to dry analysis of the mind. A person will never receive absolute information or complete confidence in his choice. Therefore, intuition also plays an important role.

All our lives we choose something, that is, we make decisions. It’s not difficult to make simple everyday decisions - it comes to the rescue personal experience or hints. It is more difficult to decide on vital decisions on which a lot depends.

Every day a person makes some decisions - simple, insignificant, relating to everyday life and Everyday life, and very serious, sometimes even global, which are capable of significantly changing the usual established course of life.

Simple solutions are given absolutely easily, quickly and with virtually no stress. But if there is a very serious issue on the agenda, then it is really very difficult to make the right choice.

After all, in this case the right decision can lead to colossal success or, on the contrary, become the only reason serious failure. This is why it is really important to know how the right decision is made.

How to do it right

1. Limit yourself to a strict time frame for making the right decision.

This is necessary so that such a limitation “helps” you choose the most effective option in a specific case, and is explained by the so-called law of forced efficiency.

2. Try to collect the maximum amount of useful information

From a large number of facts, it is much easier to choose the only one that suits you, and besides, this will help you take a more objective look at the specific situation at hand.

3. Turn off your emotions

IN in this case they seriously interfere with making the right decision, because while they are gushing you are not able to reason soberly, detachedly and sufficiently objectively. It is much more useful to wait until all feelings have calmed down, and only then start thinking, otherwise it is so easy to make not the best decision in the heat of the moment.

4. Find the right algorithm

If the search for the correct algorithm of actions is directly related to work, then the implementation of this issue can simply be delegated to someone else. This way you can significantly save your own time.

And remember that if you complete a task at least once, then, most likely, you will subsequently do it constantly. Such additional employment without any benefits and dividends in the future is absolutely useless. Therefore, a rational approach in the form of delegation of authority is great way For proper organization own work schedule.

5. Learn to correctly prioritize your thoughts.

Try to structure your thoughts according to the principle of greatest importance. This skill will more than once allow you to find the most correct way out of absolutely any situation. This skill will allow you not to get confused in your own reasoning when analyzing complex problems.

6. Try to get rid of such feelings as fear of possible failure.

It really makes it difficult to choose and make the right decision. Because of this conflicting feeling, many actually suffer serious defeat. In order for obsessive fear to recede and not interfere with you, you need to analyze everything in detail possible consequences, which may sometimes arise as a result various options choice, and only after that you can begin to act.

7. Try to make decisions in a calm environment with a sense of inner balance

If you are such a suspicious person whose imagination simply knows no bounds, then try to calm down and relax by resting a little, listening to pleasant music, drinking tea or simply taking a sedative.

8. Be as objective and honest with yourself as possible.

There is absolutely no need to exaggerate or embellish certain facts, which may have unnecessary influence and subsequently lead to the wrong choice.

9. Learn to set priorities correctly and correctly

This is very important when developing different options for action. Decide what is truly most important to you: children, family, career, work, money or anything else. Always be aware of possible costs, because they can have a fairly large impact on the correctness and effectiveness of a particular decision.

How to make a really good decision

How often do many subsequently sincerely regret what they did, because they are sure that the choice in the current situation was absolutely wrong. If we approach the issue more globally and sensibly, we can draw the unexpected conclusion that, in essence, there are no right or wrong decisions.

If you are serious about achieving a specific goal, which is extremely important and priority for you, then all your further actions that you periodically take in its direction will be exclusively correct. But in essence, choosing a true solution is an exclusively subjective concept, so do it yourself.

Sometimes the current situation does not require an immediate decision, and the choice can be postponed for some time until the nuances are clarified. But very often new facts can make the decision-making process even more difficult.

This paradox is explained by the fact that in some cases, the more persistence and effort expended to obtain a result, the much worse everything turns out. Or in other words, the longer you spend solving a problem, the more large quantity unknown facts unexpectedly emerge in this difficult matter.

This is why we need a certain time frame for making a decision. It is time that significantly limits the ability to analyze a lot of options.

In other cases, a hasty decision leads to a colossal collapse. In such situations, on the contrary, it is much more productive to wait some time so that it is possible to objectively assess the problem. But indecision and artificial delay in making a decision can lead to someone else getting ahead of you or the situation itself becoming more acute. Then you will regret that you did not hurry up with your choice.

"Helpers" in making the right decision

If the problem is truly serious, then it does not have to be solved solely by one person. Seek help and advice from your friends or family. Psychologists say that if you voice the problem several times, the situation will become clearer, and you will be able to find such a simple, but truly ingenious way out of it.

And an outside perspective can be really insightful. But you shouldn’t get hung up on the problem and tell everyone you meet about it. This way you will only waste a lot of time complaining and lamenting, and this will in no way bring the possibility of solving it any closer.

If before you very rarely made decisions on your own, and almost always consulted with someone, then in a situation where the issue needs to be resolved quickly, just imagine what you would be advised to do. Like internal dialogue can be really very productive and incredibly useful.

Try to analyze the situation from the point of view of the availability of alternative possibilities. Do not choose only one option, believing in its absolute correctness.

Come up with several of them so that you can compare something else with your first option. Play out the situation in your head as if that original idea simply did not exist, how would you act in this case? you are sure to discover several alternatives that will help you in your difficult choice.

Remember the old saying that the morning is much wiser than the evening? This is true. You need to “go to sleep” with the problem, and in the morning you may come up with a simple, but truly ingenious solution. There is a rational explanation for this: our brain and our subconscious already know the maximum number of all possible ways out of this current situation. During the night's rest, the analysis process does not stop or stop for a minute, and in the morning you get the best option.

IN complex process making the right decision is not last role Your own intuition is at play, so don’t completely ignore it. Listen more often own feelings, and if you feel some discomfort, then look at other options. Believe me, yours inner voice sometimes it makes mistakes much less often than your mind.

Making the right decision is only half the battle

It is much more important to follow it (see “”). That's why:

• start acting immediately and without delay, because various hitches and delays significantly reduce the chances of achieving success;
• try not to change your decision after half the path to the goal has already been completed - this is ineffective;
• remain true to your initial views - this will give you confidence in the exceptional correctness of the decisions made and the speedy achievement of success;
• if, after the first steps, you suddenly realize that your path is wrong, then you need to abandon it as soon as possible; find your balance between perseverance and flexibility - this will allow you to move towards your goal quite persistently, but if you really need to quickly change your plan of action without significant losses for yourself.

Will provide you with invaluable assistance in making the right decisions own experience, who is the most devoted and faithful adviser in difficult situations.

The fight against doubt is the most difficult thing a successful entrepreneur has to deal with every day: whether to accept an offer or not, take an order or refuse, invest money in a project or not. Sometimes, this kind of doubt helps to make the right choice and not lose money, but what if it interferes with running a business? Understand yourself and find the answer to the question “What to do when you can’t make a decision?” Recommendations from psychologists will help.

Tip 1. Give yourself time to make a decision.

When faced with the impossibility of choosing between alternatives, you need to understand the root cause that prevents you from making a decision. Observe the situation from the outside, think about other solutions, or just relax: very often, what at first seemed like a complex and difficult task can be easily solved with a “fresh” head. For example, if you are concerned about where to get money, then after thinking carefully, you will find a solution to this problem, including borrowing money - zajmy.kz.

Tip 2. Trust your feelings and intuition.

Many mistakes are made because people are accustomed to making decisions based on the voice of reason, forgetting about the presence of a “sixth” sense. When a person acts according to the dictates of his heart, he has no black streaks, and all his decisions are correct, and he will never regret them.

Tip 3. Don't go against your principles.

Are you ready to make the final choice, but you need to compromise with your conscience? Refuse this decision and try to find another way out of the situation, because... You still won't get moral satisfaction from implementing your plan. And remember: the human mind is accustomed to looking for the easiest solution. But if you have to solve a difficult, confusing situation, the answer does not lie on the surface, and in order to find the right solution, you need to scroll through hundreds of combinations and variations in your head.

Tip 4. Fight doubts

It is doubt that becomes a stumbling block to the implementation of projects that could bring a consistently high income. Just imagine what would happen if Steve Jobs doubted the feasibility of developing computer technology or if Bill Gates for some reason refused to create operating system Windows?

Tip 5. Accept the need to choose

The ability to understand the inevitability of choice distinguishes a successful businessman from hired workers, because starting a business involves independent decision any situations: from minor conflicts between subordinates to the choice of strategic development of the company. That is why many decisions have to be made under the heading “this is how it should be”.

When the choice is made, there is not much left: to implement the plan. But even at this stage, doubt may lie in wait for you. What can you do to avoid this? If you set this question psychologists, they will offer 2 alternatives:

1. Imagine that instead of the chosen course of action, you chose the worst case scenario. What could happen in such a case? This practice will help you once again be convinced of the correctness of the decision made.

2. Spin it in your mind like a slide positive points that the implementation of the chosen solution will give you. This will help you clearly understand the ultimate goal for which your entire company is working.

The right choice for you!

The ability to make decisions is the most important skill, without which you will not be able to effectively manage your life and take responsibility for your actions. Ideally, we learn it from childhood, and gradually, with experience, we find the optimal way to do it. But sometimes the situation is so complex that the process of choosing from possible options action becomes painful. In this case, how to make the right decision?

It is impossible to accurately predict future events. Therefore, deciding what to do in a given situation is so difficult. But the more often you make decisions (by the way, both right and wrong), the easier you feel about this process, and what you should rely on first.

What prevents you from making decisions

Fears, complexes, self-doubt - these are the main factors standing between you and the right decision. The imagination paints colorful pictures of the terrifying consequences of changing jobs or moving to a new home. The burden of responsibility for their actions, from which many parents today try to protect their children, seems unbearable to many.

After all, until you make a decision, you (seemingly) have nothing to do with the consequences. You can say “Circumstances turned out this way” instead of “I didn’t succeed.” We want assurance that whatever we do will get us where we want to be. The trouble is that it is simply impossible to obtain such guarantees.

That’s why so many people, in fact, don’t make any decisions - they’ve been in unsatisfying, empty relationships for years (after all, who knows how everything will turn out if they break up), they’re doing uninteresting things they don’t like (you have to make a living somehow), and if “ stuck,” and you need to make a decision, or it has already been made by someone for you - they continue to hope that everything will somehow resolve.

How do we act when faced with the need to make a decision?

Over the course of their lives, most people eventually tend toward one or another strategy of behavior in complex situations. life situation when you need to decide how to proceed. Fatalists rely on fate, chance, karma, and are convinced that no matter what option they choose, everything is predetermined, and in any case everything will be as it will be.

Decision making is a process in which you use logic, the ability to analyze existing experience, a sense of self-preservation, as well as courage and the ability to take risks. Knowing how to put it all together increases the likelihood that the chosen course of action will be the right one for you.

How to make a decision

Let's take a closer look at each element of decision-making, see what ways there are to systematize this process and improve each of its components.

Weigh all the pros and cons

By appealing to logic, a person organizes possible positive and Negative consequences the decision made. You can use two criteria - pros and cons, you can complicate the system and use the so-called “Descartes square”. In this case, you will get not two columns, but a square of four sections entitled:

1. Benefits from positive consequences;
2. Disadvantages from positive consequences;
3. Pros from negative consequences;
4. Cons from negative consequences.

For example, you choose between a more profitable and a more promising position, and lean towards the future. Write down all the pros and cons of it. that you will earn less, and all the pros and cons of being able to occupy a prestigious position in the future.

The Cartesian method helps to expand the angle of view on the situation, to look at it from four different sides. But after you do this, minimize the number of significant factors, leaving in the columns one, the most significant argument for each option. Because the next important point when making a decision is to simplify the choice as much as possible

Keep it simple

To make the right decision, it is very important not to overwhelm yourself. Do not build multi-stage schemes, make the choice as simple as possible, remove the unnecessary, leaving only the truly important. In the job example above, you ultimately need to decide whether you are willing to trade off today's financial stability and prosperity for future prospects.

This leads to another the most important moment. To make decisions easier, you need to clearly understand what you want, what is important to you, what are your life priorities. If you don't know what to strive for, where you are going and who you are - how can you decide how to act? As Lewis Carroll wrote, “If you don’t care where you go, then you don’t care where you go, you’ll end up somewhere.”

Eliminate the fear of mistakes

People who are afraid of making a mistake often have difficulty making decisions. It is necessary, often growing from childhood. We are used to thinking about mistakes as bad grades (for example), because of which we will not be accepted into college, and our future will be ruined.

But there is another way of looking at an error and any of its consequences. Everything that happens to us, including wrong decisions, is the experience we need. In a sense, for the development of decision-making skill, mistakes and subsequent experiences are more important or as important as correct decisions. Without making a mistake (failed relationship, wrong career choice), how will you know what is right for you and what is not?

Every wrong decision brings you closer to the right one. Any experience is essentially neutral, positive or negative, only our emotional reaction makes it. What seems like a disaster to you today may turn out to be a great blessing in a couple of months or years. You can't know this, and no one can.

Therefore, it is stupid to be afraid of mistakes. Who knows. Where would you be now if not for all those events (including those that you evaluate as mistakes) that happened in your life. Therefore, to make a decision, it is important not to dramatize, but rather to calm down, simplify the situation as much as possible, and take a step forward.

What does the right decision mean?

And in conclusion, a little about what the “right” solution is and whether it exists. What criteria of correctness should we focus on, since there are many coordinate systems? What seems right to some is complete nonsense to others.

Only you, unless of course you are an adult, responsible and independent person(and not an over-aged child) you can choose internal system assessments. And you still won’t know for sure whether you did the right thing by abandoning one in favor of the other.

Practice meaningful decision making every day, in the small things. What will you eat for breakfast, what will you wear to work, what will you do in the evening? After all, it’s not that difficult, you’ll agree. Serious decisions, such as choosing a place to live or a vocation, are not so different from everyday, intermediate ones, as we are used to thinking about them. “I don’t want to eat porridge today, but I want cottage cheese” is almost the same as “I never want to eat cottage cheese again, but I want to become a vegetarian.”

Think about it for a moment. Choosing the main things in life begins with choosing the simple ones. When you understand what you want, you gradually begin to understand how to get there. And then there are almost no wrong decisions left in your life, or rather, their correctness loses its hyper-significance, and it becomes much easier to make them.

If you want to be with the man you love, you need to figure out whether you are compatible according to your zodiac sign?

If you are in doubt about the right decision, consult an expert in the field. Doc in a certain area will help you sort everything out and explain why you should do one way or another. When you do not have the opportunity or desire to resort to outside help, you can collect information about the subject that interests you yourself. The more facts you have, the more complete you can paint a picture of what is happening.

Weigh the pros and cons carefully. Try to predict how events might develop with different outcomes. Assess the current situation, think calmly, objectively and soberly. Never make a decision under the influence of strong emotions, both negative and positive. Better wait, calm down, and if your position does not change over time, act. Perhaps then your decision will be the opposite of the first, then you will save yourself from making a mistake.

The will of chance

If all possible outcomes seem approximately the same to you, you can use old methods. Flip a coin or draw lots. Such methods are good not because they tell you what to do, but because, having received a certain result, you can suddenly understand what outcome you were hoping for in your soul. So do this - in accordance with your own instincts.

In general, some people tend to underestimate the benefits that can be obtained by listening to their intuition. Don't be like them. Trust your own feelings and sensations more. It is your subconscious that gives you a signal, but it accumulates all the information, even that which you thought was lost, and all your life experience.

It happens that you cannot decide to take some action because you do not trust to a certain person. Think about what reasons you have for this. If you know this individual quite poorly, it is better to refuse to do business with him, since your instinct stops you from doing so.

Do not be afraid

Perhaps it is difficult for you to make a decision because you are not ready to bear responsibility for it. If this is truly your responsibility, then you should be brave and take the situation into your own hands. And when they try to force you to make a choice for someone, you don’t need to be a puppet in someone else’s hands.

Perhaps you are afraid of the changes that can be expected immediately after you make a certain decision. In this case, you should calm down and realize that changes in almost 100 percent of cases lead to improvements, and stop hesitating.

A person is constantly faced with the need to make one choice or another. This situation accompanies him literally at every step: in the store, when he needs to decide what and in what quantity to buy, at work, in family life. It's good if we're talking about about some minor problem that will not entail serious consequences in the event of an error. Well, what if the question is really important? What if the cost of a wrong decision can be high? Some people in such a situation may become confused and delay making a decision. How to act correctly?

Instructions

First of all, convince yourself that just because you are avoiding a solution under all sorts of pretexts and are stalling for time, the problem will not go away. The decision will still have to be made, so it’s better to do it sooner rather than later.

Of course, “early” does not mean “quickly.” Think it over carefully. If there are several options for solving a particular issue or problem, carefully consider them without missing a single one. Try to objectively analyze both the pros and cons of each option and choose the most optimal one.

If the question is truly complex, especially if you yourself feel and admit that you lack the knowledge or information to make a decision, seek advice from specialists whose opinions you can trust. In general, if possible in such situations, you should consult with knowledgeable people. As it says folk wisdom, "One head it's good, but two better".