What should a true Christian be like? What an Orthodox Christian Should Never Do

Hieromonk Peter (Borodulin) answers

Hello! What should an Orthodox Christian do if the passions are so ingrained that there is no opportunity for repentance and correction? George

George, if you put your question in other words, it will sound something like this: “What should a Christian do if passions have completely taken over him and even Christ cannot help, everything is so hopeless.” And most likely, that Orthodox Christian about whom you write is tired and despondent. And he has neither the strength nor the desire to fight passions. In this state, it is easiest to accept defeat and give up ...

The state that you describe as “lack of opportunity for repentance and correction” is rather the state of fallen angels, so rooted in evil and opposition to God that there really is no opportunity for them to repent. But for a person, the possibility of repentance and correction remains until death. The Gospel of John says: God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, so that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life(In. 3 , 16). The Holy Apostle Peter writes: The Lord is not slow in [fulfilling] the promise, as some consider it slowness; but is patient with us, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.(2 Pet. 3 , nine). The Lord tirelessly waits for our correction and repentance. But in our country, unfortunately, the desire for repentance and correction may disappear. And this place is occupied by despondency – “I repent, I repent, but it’s all to no avail”, and disbelief in God’s help – “I can’t get better, which means the Lord doesn’t help me.”

To succumb to despondency is to turn one's back on God. To be offended by God for the fact that we are not able to move forward at least one step. Yes, but there is no other way to improve, except for forcing yourself to do good and daily struggle with yourself, with your passions, of course, there is no repentance and expectation of God's help.

Indeed, passion can take possession of a person so strongly that it seems to become his nature. A person would be glad to repent, but sin again and again wins, despite the bitterness and feeling of emptiness that come after committing a sin.

It is important here to get up after falls, to strive to overcome passion, to make efforts to correct, to fight. And with salvific stubbornness, undoubted faith in God's help and complete hope for correction, again appear before the eyes of God: come to confession and repent, repent, repent ...

Help us all, Lord.

I have this question. At work, some of my comrades like to swear. I tried to politely ask not to swear - to no avail. The fact is that people do not just swear, but speak it, it has become so habitual that it seems that they can no longer speak differently. And I myself, voluntarily or involuntarily, after hearing swear words are repeated in my mind. How to be in such a situation, if the requests do not work? In the temple, the priest told me that I should ask not to swear. I tried to ask one person not to swear - he replied that he could not do otherwise. I tried to object to him, but in response the person only became angry and annoyed. Can I provoke a reaction with my requests when they curse me to spite me? What is the best thing to do if requests not to swear do not bring results? Andrey

Andrei, apparently, you will not be able to re-educate your colleagues at work. It is impossible to wean a person from swearing until he himself wants it, until he understands that it is bad. Usually work is not the place where you can influence people and change the way they behave if you are not a leader or boss.

And to provoke another person to start swearing to spite you is very easy. Some of your co-workers may see your dislike for swearing as a weakness and may use foul language as a weapon against you if they want to, for example, make fun of you or piss you off.

What to do? There are situations that we are not able to fix. And this one is one of those. You need to learn to let the foul language go past your ears, not to pay attention to it.

First, you need to come to terms with the inevitability of hearing foul language at work. You have to let it be at work. The exception here is foul language in the presence of women and children: this is an absolutely unacceptable thing, which cannot be put up with in any case and must be immediately and decisively suppressed.

Secondly, it is necessary to develop the right attitude towards foul language. Once such a story happened to one of our modern elders. Once a visitor came to him, a rude man, accustomed to swearing, and they began a conversation with the elder. The elder's cell attendant, unable to listen to the visitor's swear words, left the room where the conversation was taking place. When the visitor left, the cell-attendant returned and asked the elder:

"Father, forgive me, why didn't you stop him?"

- What's the matter?

— Why, he cursed so much!

- Yes?! And I didn't hear anything...

The meaning of the story is the following: a person who lives an attentive spiritual life, who does not allow foul language, not only in words, but also in thoughts, can really remain pure in this world, lying in evil: hearing, not hearing what does not concern him and his essence conversation.

If you can’t do it right away, then try to fence yourself off, build a barrier around yourself, distract yourself from foul language, somehow force it out of your mind: think about something else, interrupt the bad swearing by thinking inside yourself about something important, relevant to you. And even better - to occupy attention with prayer: read the psalms, the prayer to the Holy Cross, the Jesus prayer. Naturally, this will require a certain spiritual tension from you.

I emphasize once again: the question describes a specific situation when there are no other ways to stop swearing, and personal exhortations do not help, but only cause irritation.

Priest Anatoly Konkov answers

Yoga classes are becoming more and more popular these days. How does the Church view this? Is it permissible for Orthodox Christians to resort to such a practice to maintain physical fitness? Elena

Yoga is a combination of various spiritual, mental and physical practices developed in different directions of Hinduism and Buddhism and aimed at managing the mental and physiological functions of the body in order to achieve an elevated spiritual and mental state by the individual.

Indian yoga, a teaching that recommends a rather ascetic, disciplined lifestyle, consists in controlling the breath and in certain physical postures that lead to a state of relaxation conducive to meditation, which usually involves the use of a mantra or sacred saying to help focus. The essence of yoga is not in the discipline itself, but in meditation, which is its goal. There may be nothing wrong with the physical exercises suggested in the classes according to this system, but a person who practices yoga only for the sake of bodily health is already preparing himself for certain spiritual views and even experiences that he does not even know about.

Orthodox yoga cannot exist in principle. When exercising according to such a system, a person begins to feel “awakening” energy, for example, warmth. The Holy Fathers, on the other hand, assert that during prayer there should not be any sensations that do not come from the heart. Everything superfluous must be rejected as soul-damaging and leading to delusion. In addition, the benefits of physical exercise itself can also be questioned. In yoga, a person most often seeks peace, harmony with himself, spiritual comfort, physical health, and perfection. Christianity, on the other hand, offers not a search for peace, not finding comfort, but, on the contrary, a voluntary martyrdom for Christ's sake. The Lord invites us to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him (cf. Matt. 16 , 24). A more detailed discussion of this issue can be found here: Archimandrite Raphael (Karelin). . Chapter: Is hatha yoga compatible with Christianity.

Hello, I am very interested in how the Orthodox Church interprets madness? Is this a punishment? Vera

The 300-year-old agreements have been abandoned. The goal of the actions taken by Constantinople is to break the back of Orthodoxy and make Ukraine forever hostile to Russia. But this will not be decided by church officials, but with God's help by people on earth - Orthodox Christians of Ukrainian parishes.

Let us briefly recall what the decisions of the Synod of the Patriarchate of Constantinople that ended on Thursday, October 11, say.

1. Confirm the already made decision that the Ecumenical Patriarchate proceeds to grant autocephaly to the Church of Ukraine.

2. Restore the stauropegia of the Ecumenical Patriarch in Kiev.

3. Accept and consider petitions for an appeal by Filaret Denisenko and Makariy Maletich to cancel the anathema imposed on them by the Russian Orthodox Church. The above persons are "canonically restored to their hierarchical or priestly rank, and their followers restored to communion with the Church."

4. Cancel the legal obligation of the Synodal Letter of 1686, which granted the Moscow Patriarch the right to appoint the Metropolitan of Kiev.

5. Appeal to all parties involved to avoid the appropriation of churches, monasteries and other objects, as well as any other act of violence and retribution, "so that the peace and love of Christ may prevail."

Thus, autocephaly was not given,. It is precisely to determine its subject that the anathema was removed from the schismatics so that they are there in Ukraine, including Onufry, the patriarch of the UOC of the Moscow Patriarchate,. But it’s not a fact that there will be a tomos in this case, because for this, stavropegy has been restored, that is, the direct subordination of specific temples (and not territories) to Bartholomew. Obviously, if the Ukrainian clergy do not come to an agreement, then all their assets, including financial ones, will de facto go to Bartholomew (de jure, they have already, as it were, gone).

Last year's Religious procession of the Ukrainian Church of the Moscow Patriarchate showed Poroshenko and his masters that without the elimination of the Orthodox force, its transfer to its subordination, it would not be possible to build a nationalist state, which, in their idea, should forever become hostile to Russia. The plan began to be implemented. Let's hope that with God's help we will be able to fight back.

How to be a Christian in the most ordinary everyday situations? This time we have selected questions from our mail about a person's attitude to himself and to his neighbors and asked them to the Metropolitan of Saratov and Volsky Longin.

“Vladyka, communication with other people is important for any person. We can say that in communication - both with people close to us and with people who are not very close and pleasant - we learn Christianity in practice. There is a question in the mail of our column “A Question to a Priest” that is quite typical for many of those who are just entering the Church or are still “looking closely” at it. The question is this: “The Gospel says that you need to love your neighbor as yourself. And elsewhere, that one must deny oneself. So is it necessary to love yourself and how to do it? Taking care of your health, good rest, and various pleasures is self-love? After all, only a person who is satisfied with life and himself can bring good to others, and an angry and twitchy one brings only trouble. Maria".

– A very good question indeed, in the sense that it, like a drop of water, reflects the worldview of modern man, who is not yet close to the Church and Christianity. Yes, the Scripture says: love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:39). This idea is also revealed in other gospel words: in everything you want people to do to you, do the same to them (Matt. 7:12). These words are the golden rule of human morality. For a Christian, this is the main principle of his relationship with other people. But in another place the Lord Jesus Christ says: if anyone wants to follow Me, deny himself, and take up your cross, and follow Me (Matt. 16:24). Here we are talking about something completely different - about the following of a person after God, the hierarchy of values ​​\u200b\u200bis affirmed in the life of a Christian.

Self love is a natural human feeling. Therefore, the Lord also speaks about love for neighbors simply and clearly, so that everyone can understand: just as you love yourself, so love the person who is nearby. Do you want prosperity? Wish well-being to another person. Do you want wealth and happiness? Wish them to another and help him to achieve this. Here we are talking about ordinary earthly things.

But the one who wants to literally follow the Lord must deny himself, that is, stop putting his own interests in the first place, push them aside, take up his cross (everything that is prepared for a person in this life - both good and unpleasant ) and patiently follow Christ. Therefore, the two gospel passages quoted in the question are talking about different things.

Taking care of your health, good rest, various pleasures - maybe this is not so much self-love as self-love. There is a difference between these concepts. I do not want to say that these things are shameful, sinful, unnecessary - no, of course not. And you need to take care of the rest, and about health. Concerning pleasures, one must treat with reason. Yes, there are pleasures that are not reprehensible, but it often happens that an abundance of various pleasures simply erases everything human in a person. In such self-care, there is only a part of self-love, and an insignificant, simple one at that. For a Christian, self-love is a striving for salvation, for life with God, striving for higher ideals. Not just to eat well, drink well, sleep and have fun, but to become a real person. One Soviet author wrote a book that was very famous in his time, which contains words that it is useful for a Christian to remember: “One must live in such a way that later it would not be excruciatingly painful for the aimlessly lived years.” In a person there should be a desire for the highest, for what after his death will remain in eternity. This is true self love.

From my point of view, the statement that only a person who is satisfied with himself can bring good to others sounds absolutely monstrous. This is absolutely false. A person who is satisfied with himself and his life is a terrible creature that is better to bypass a kilometer. In order to understand this, it is enough to read classical literature, where all self-satisfied people are anti-heroes.

If a person is angry and twitchy - yes, these are really bad qualities, and they say that he is not used to and has never even tried to learn to endure any trials in his life with patience. After all, there is no problem-free life, otherwise rich and famous people would not have hung themselves and shot themselves, they would not have left their wealth in such a terrible way. The human soul is an abyss. It cannot be filled with all the riches and pleasures of the world, because it was created by God and for God, and only in God can it rest.

A truly accomplished person is one who has learned with gratitude to God and with patience to overcome everything difficult and unpleasant, who lives with hope in God, with love for Him and for the people around him. You really want to be with such a person.

- And what if a person initially has a difficult character? We have the following question: “Tell me, please, why does God give one person a humble, kind, meek character from birth, and another, on the contrary, proud, angry, irritable? It turns out that it is easier for kind people to be virtuous, it is easier to save themselves. And their earthly life develops more successfully than those who have a difficult character. And this happens, for example, due to the fact that in their family at one time they did not receive love and proper education. Why such injustice? Or am I doing something wrong?

- Yes, dear author of the question, both right and wrong. All people are different in nature, but I do not agree that they are born with such sharp differences. A lot depends on upbringing, on what a person received in the family. Let me remind you that there is a wonderful example in the book of Abba Dorotheus "Emotional Teachings", in the chapter "On not judging your neighbor". Two girls were sold at the slave market. A pious woman bought one, made her a member of her family, raised her to be virtuous. And the harlot bought another and raised accordingly. And Abba Dorotheos asks: when these girls grow up, if they sin with the same sin, will the Lord judge them with the same judgment? Of course not. This must be kept in mind. The Lord will evaluate the actions of a person, taking into account the circumstances of life in which he was brought up.

In general, this is a difficult question, one of those that have always come to people's minds (they are also called "damned"). Recall that to such questions of St. Anthony the Great (“Lord, why do some people live long and others short? Why do the good suffer, and the evil prosper? ..”) God answered: “Anthony, then the fate of God, and you listen and you will be saved." There are things that we will receive an answer to in eternity. But we ourselves need to improve ourselves - try to be kind, never judge anyone. If you see that something did not work out for you in your youth, in your youth, you need to re-educate yourself. It is difficult, but, with God's help, it is possible. Strictly speaking, Christianity is a long, until death, the process of educating a person of himself.

– By tradition, we have a lot of questions about sin, which almost all of us have to repent of at every confession. “There is always something: and in a conversation with loved ones you learn something about someone against your will, and you yourself share if something unpleasant happened at work,” our reader notices and asks: how to distinguish condemnation from statements of fact and how to “swallow” the unpleasant things that other people say about you or do about you?

- What we call here a statement of fact is most likely also a condemnation. We cannot turn a blind eye to some obvious injustice or wrongness. They need to be recognized, but it is not at all necessary to hear about it from others or tell someone yourself. In this case, this is a condemnation of the purest water, and no other definitions for this phenomenon exist.

In order not to judge others, a person must be very honest and attentive to himself. When he is aware of his own state - and it is very unimportant for all of us - then it will not occur to him to condemn those around him. You need to constantly make an effort not to judge, this is the main thing. Then something will start to happen. In fact, everything that concerns the spiritual life requires constant effort: the Kingdom of Heaven is taken by force, and those who use force take it by force (Matt. 11, 12).

As for how to "swallow the unpleasant" - skill is also needed here. But what? Again, Abba Dorotheus has a good example. He talks about one monk who was constantly scolded, and he seemed to take it quite calmly. Surprised by such dispensation, Abba Dorotheos asked: Brother, tell me, how did you achieve dispassion? He replied contemptuously: “Should I pay attention to their shortcomings or accept insults from them as from people? These are barking dogs." And Abba Dorotheos remarks here with mournful irony: “This brother has found the way…”. Under no circumstances should this path be taken. You need to be able to set yourself up to see your shortcomings. See, we're back to it again. Then nothing that other people say about us will seem completely wrong to us. “I accept what is worthy according to my deeds” - this is a normal attitude.

You need to cultivate humility. According to one of the Optina elders, humility does not get angry with anyone and does not anger anyone (this is very often forgotten!). Not to be angry with anyone is the first stage, very difficult, it can take a person years. The second is not to anger anyone ... Then you just grab your head and say: "We need one more life in order to achieve this." But you have to try.

How can you learn to get along with people? “How to learn a sense of tact and diplomacy? Because of this, sometimes I push people away and cannot build harmonious relationships. Are there spiritual methods for this?” our reader asks.

- You see, what's the matter: there are no "spiritual methods" in order to achieve some positive results in self-education. A person must live a Christian life in all its fullness - strive for God, try to fulfill the commandments of God, be attentive to oneself and to others. And if, thanks to this, he is “reformatted” into an internally collected, attentive to his own movements of the soul, to actions, to words, then he also acquires the ability to improve his relations with people. This is not tact and diplomacy - in the spiritual life it is called differently. Then a person becomes both a helper and a pleasant companion, in general, those who can be relied upon in life. A Christian is an integral person in whom it is impossible to single out any individual virtues. Therefore, you need to educate a Christian in yourself, review your life, completely reconfigure it in accordance with the Gospel - then everything will work out. Otherwise, self-training. Of course, with an effort of will, you can force yourself to be diplomatic or just learn good manners. But, you see, when there is no religious motivation and real internal restructuring, all this is very unreliable and fragile. Therefore, I think you just need to change your whole life.

Prepared by Natalia Gorenok

1. Telling people “I will pray for you” and not doing it.

The accusation is well founded. I don't think anyone hasn't sinned with this from time to time. And since most of us don't "deliberately" forget this, the best thing we can do is immediately (when promised) set aside time in our schedule to pray for certain people. Are we really so busy that we can't stop for a moment and pray for someone's need? We must take care to really fulfill our duties as Christians and to constantly see to it. Our prayer can be a turning point in another person's life, leading him to know God's love. Don't let your "busyness" deprive you of the opportunity to bring the life of Christ to others with your prayers.

2. Attend church every Sunday and ignore God's voice on other days of the week.

Ouch! It stuck a little, didn't it? Many of us have made God just one of the items in our weekly schedule, and it has become a habit. The truth is that our whole life should revolve around God. God deserves to be number one on our list of priorities. Any other attitude towards Him destroys the very foundation of the Christian faith. Analyze how and on what you spend your time, money, effort. If you want to see changes in your life, then you should give God the most honorable place in your heart. Stop referring to God as the “last bench” on the field.

3. Constantly asking God for “ours” and rejecting what He has already given us.

Too many of us treat God like our “personal genie.” Prayer is given to us as an open access to God to communicate with Him, but the bitter reality is that too many of us use it as a bank or fast food restaurants. It is not for us to decide and tell God what to give us. We must trust His plans, believe His promises. I won't talk about how often God sent me answers and I didn't accept them just because they "didn't look" the way I imagined them. Each time, consciously ignoring God's answers (those that we do not like), we seem to say to Him: "I don't trust your plans".

4. Excessive attempts to fit into the culture, which distorts the message of Jesus.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be modern, but we must understand that it is very easy to become "culturally appropriate" to completely distort the message of Christ. We hope in vain to change this world if we are no different from it. I strongly believe that Jesus did not come to abolish, but to enlighten the culture, but that does not mean that we should dilute His message to make it easier for people to swallow.

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5. Telling people that "God will never send anything they can't handle."

Why shouldn't we teach this to people? Just because... it's a lie. Such an opinion is a complete distortion of what is written in 1 Cor. 10:13 because this verse is talking about temptations—but even that verse says we need God in times of great trial. The reality is that God can send just such difficulties with which we cannot cope on our own and we will be forced to seek help from Him. Does it shock you? Understand that everything in your life will not always happen in accordance with your plans, opinions and hopes. Sometimes life gives us such unpleasant surprises that in order to get through this black streak, we just need to rely on God, on His comfort, peace, presence. God did not create us for a life “independent of Him”.

the God is love and the source of all virtues. The goal of a Christian's spiritual life is striving for God, striving to become like Him, the desire to communicate with Him, and reciprocal love for Him. Those. the task is to reorient from utilitarian, earthly things to the eternal God.

The initial condition for spiritual life is fulfillment of the moral law to a minimum “So in everything you want people to do to you, do to them the same way.”(), while its maximum degree is "Love your neighbor as yourself"(). Those. before climbing to the heights of the spiritual life, it is desirable to put things in order in the moral sphere. Begin by studying and fulfilling the 10 Old Testaments.

Spiritual birth is Sacrament of Baptism. If you are not yet, then it is better to do this after completing the courses (learning the basics of faith). Find a temple where there are such courses and they are the longest. If you are already baptized, but for some reason your parents and godparents neglected their promises to raise you in, then try to find such courses on your own.

Get a pectoral cross in the temple as a visible evidence of belonging to the Orthodox Church, confession of the Christian faith and a means of protection. Keep in mind that the simplest cross on a string is no different from a massive gold one on a thick chain, except for the price and appearance.

Confessor. Do not rush to look for a spiritual genius, a holy elder; as soon as you become a saint, God will certainly give it to you. For now, the one you choose is enough, to which you feel confidence. Do not try to run to the clergy with any question, do it only when you could not find it in books or on well-known Orthodox websites, or when you need personal spiritual advice.

Quite briefly, the goal of a Christian's life can be formulated as a desire for (holiness), based on.

learn, the process of spiritual growth, knowledge of God is endless and extends beyond the limits of our earthly life. I have accumulated vast invaluable experience in the practice of spiritual life, which is available to our study. He will teach spiritual reasoning and help to avoid many falls and mistakes.